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Flash Movie Review: The Man with the Iron Fists
Ladies and gentlemen for tonight’s main attraction; oh wait, that is not right. There were very few women in the audience for this blood fest. For the couple of women seated near me I am guessing they lost a bet; one seemed more interested in her fingernails than what was on the screen. I haven’t seen so much slicing and dicing since I had to wait in line at the neighborhood delicatessen during their cold cuts holiday sale. With Quentin Tarantino as a producer, one has to know there is going to be a spirited blood bath. It was 19th century China and Jungle Village was the home to several rival clans. When word got out that a shipment of gold was to be transported through the village; mysterious individuals, mobs and assassins plotted a way to steal the gold and seize power. Rza (Repo Men, American Gangster) wrote the screenplay, directed the movie and starred as the blacksmith who was forced to make elaborate weapons for rival gangs. Russell Crowe (Robin Hood, A Beautiful Mind) was the curious Jack Knife, a man who was as comfortable with his knife as he was with his opium. And to interject a shot of estrogen into this dominant men’s club, Lucy Liu (Kill Bill Vol. 1, Charlie’s Angels) was the lethal Madam Blossom, with her bevy of poisonous beauties. The action drove the majority of this story and that was a good thing. With only Russell and Lucy doing any acting worth noting, the other characters were left portraying poor caricatures. There was a comic book flavor to this kung fu film with unsophisticated humor and sight gags. I will say some of the fight scenes were decent, but it lacked the finesse of a true martial arts master. If one is looking to see people getting the crap beat out of them in a somewhat creative way, this would be a cheap choice. Scenes with graphic violence and blood, including the movie trailer.
2 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Unstoppable
I used to have a love/hate relationship with trains growing up. As a little kid I never wanted to sit by the windows when the train was above ground. I thought my weight would tip the train over, so I always tried to stay close to the center of the train car. Talk about having a poor self image as a little overweight child. Only when the train would go below ground would I finally relax, since I felt the dark tunnels we traveled would always keep us upright. At least that is how I rationalized it. These days when I travel to a new city I make a point of always using their public transportation; it makes me feel like an adventurer. Seeing a trailer for this action film, I thought I could easily roll with the story. I still get a kick out of the train rides at amusement parks, so this movie looked like it would be an exciting thrill ride. Inspired by true events, human error caused an unmanned freight train to leave the yard, with its cargo of toxic chemicals. With no air brakes the train would continue to pick up speed until it derailed, causing a life threatening disaster. If seasoned engineer Frank, played by Denzel Washington (The Great Debaters, American Gangster), along with young conductor Will, played by Chris Pine (Star Trek, People Like Us), had any chance to stop a tragedy from occurring, they would have to work together in a race against time. At the start I enjoyed the no nonsense approach the director took in setting up the basis of the story. I was curious to see how the action would be sustained, since in my mind a train seemed like it would have less exciting options than if the story was about a hijacked or crippled airplane. It was a false concern; the action kept a steady pace as the tension grew incrementally. The acting was nothing special to me. Denzel was doing his Denzel method, being on autopilot while Chris did not bring anything new to the table. I thought Rosario Dawson (Seven Pounds, Sin City) did a good job as Connie who worked at the train operating center. This film is fine for those who want to experience the thrill of an amusement park ride without waiting in line.
2 2/3 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Cowboys & Aliens
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but lasers will always hurt you. When I first heard about the mash up of cowboys and aliens I thought what a strange combination. Adding in the actors chosen for this film, I decided to check out and see if our latest James Bond actor could handle beings from outer space. Jake Loneran, played by Daniel Craig (Defiance, Casino Royale) woke up without his memory and a strange metal bracelet attached to his wrist. After wandering into the small town of Absolution, he was identified as a wanted man. Just as he was about to be hauled off to face justice, strange lights appeared in the sky that attacked the town. If people wanted to be saved they would have to stand behind Jake, who had the key to saving earth; he just did not know it. Daniel Craig did some things that reminded me of his James Bond character, but he was wooden in this performance. Harrison Ford (Air Force One, Extraordinary Measures), as feared landowner Woodrow Dolarhyde, was more like a mean Indiana Jones. The only reason Olivia Wilde (In Time, The Words) was cast as Ella Swenson was for the writers to inject a love interest angle into the story. Her story line made little sense to me. I was completely perplexed why Paul Dano (There Will be Blood, Ruby Sparks) would agree to play whining Percy Dolarhyde, Woodrow’s son. The story was silly rubbish; it was a disappointment. I liked the special effects and action but they were not enough to maintain my interest during the illogical parts. Daniel Craig better ditch the cowboy hat and go back to his stirred not shaken martini.
1 3/4 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Here Comes the Boom
What a rude awakening I got my first week as a high school freshman. The first time in physical ed class a ceiling tile fell, nearly hitting a student in the head. From that day forward I always kept one eye on the roof waiting for the next tile bomb to drop. Since my elementary school did not have a cafeteria, the first time I walked down the lunch room line I was surprised by how many food items did not look like they were part of nature. I do not recall any teachers who would do what the teachers did in this movie. If Kevin James (Grown Ups, The King of Queens-TV) was graded for playing teacher Scott Voss, he would get an above average for effort. He deserved credit for doing the physical training the role demanded. Scott would try to become a mixed martial arts fighter to raise money for classes being cut, due to a budget shortfall. If he could get a scheduled fight, he would get paid even if he lost. It was a win-win situation. The cast was an enjoyable bunch to watch. Kevin’s character was affable and down to earth. I do have to say it was odd seeing Henry Winkler (Click, Happy Days-TV) playing a submissive, wishy washy character as music teacher Marty Streb. Come on, he was the Fonz. The other surprise was seeing Salma Hayek (Frida, Once Upon a Time in Mexico) playing school nurse Bella Flores in this comedy. For what was required of her, she was fine in this role. The problem with this movie was the story was bloated and predictable. The multitude of sight gags did not always work, being dull and flat. More chuckles than laughs, this boom was more like a pop. A brief scene with blood.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: Taken 2
I was glad my dad taught me how to drive the year before I was scheduled to take driver’s ed in high school. Only one day practicing in a parking lot before we headed out onto the streets. When I finally took class I was the brakeman for the car. There was a poor girl in my group who kept sideswiping the safety cones. The instructor made her walk the driving course using one of the cones as a steering wheel. In this movie I would like to know how the daughter Kim, played by Maggie Grace (Lockout, The Jane Austen Book Club) was able to drive a stolen car better than Jason Statham in his Transporter movies. She had flunked the driver’s test twice prior. This was just one of the ridiculous events that took place in this low minded sequel. On a business trip to Istanbul Bryan Mills, played by Liam Neeson (The Grey, Schindler’s List), was surprised when his daughter and ex-wife Lenore, played by Famke Janssen (X-Men franchise, The Treatment), showed up to visit. Kim hoped the time together would rekindle her parents’ love for each other. However, she was not aware of the plan in place, hatched by the father of one of her kidnappers in the previous movie. Murad Krasniqi, played by Rade Serbedzija (Shooter, In the Land of Milk and Honey), wanted to take revenge on Bryan and his family for the death of his son. The movie was a disappointment due to the weak script and silly action scenes. There was nothing original here and I found it amazing that Liam’s character was able to kill so many people without even getting grazed by a single bullet. The saving grace was Liam doing what he did best and that was act. At his age to be considered an action hero is an accomplishment. I only wish he would be more selective in his movie choices, because after seeing this film I feel I was taken. Violent scenes with blood.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Dredd
Driving around the city, it has become more and more I wish I had the authority to be the judge, jury and executioner for the crazy drivers around me. The guy who was brushing his teeth and rinsing out with a can of soda while driving would get canned by me. Or the woman who was weaving out of her lane because she was putting on her makeup would be brushed off the road if I had a say. And do not get me started on the parent who was too busy talking on their cell phone at the grocery store to notice their child pulling items off the shelf and onto the floor. If I was in charge there would me more parking spaces and less traffic on the road. Not being a follower of Judge Dredd, I went into this movie with only a vague memory of the 1995 Sylvester Stallone film. Set in the future, citizens lived in huge mega towers that reached 200 floors. The police were known as judges since they had the authority to arrest, try and if need be instantly execute felons. Judge Dredd, played by Karl Urban (Star Trek, The Bourne Supremacy) was a top judge who was assigned a female rookie to train. Cassandra Anderson, played by Olivia Thirlby (Juno, No Strings Attached), was no ordinary judge; she possessed strong psychic abilities. Called to a brutal crime scene, the two became trapped in one of the mega towers, with a bounty placed on their heads by the evil drug lord Ma-Ma, played by Lena Headley (300, Game of Thrones-TV). With the odds stacked against them, the two judges would have to outwit and outlast the constant stream of thugs hell bent on killing them. Karl Urban took this role to heart, not once removing his helmet to give his face some screen time. Olivia did a fine job of acting in this tense film. The special effects were good, especially when showing the effects of the mind altering drug Slo-Mo. What lacked in this movie was sheer excitement; I never felt emotionally engaged with the action scenes. They came across as if they had been over rehearsed, casting a dullness onto the scenes. It seemed as if each scene was volleying between chasing or shooting. The elements were all in place for this to be a better movie; ironically it was the execution of it that softened the impact. Graphic violence with blood.
2 1/2 stars
Flash Movie Review: Looper
It felt like my brain was given an electrical pulse within the first few minutes of this intelligent, science fiction movie. Even those not into this genre, would absolutely enjoy the great story. There were several ways one could interpret the movie. For me, I pondered the concept that our past influences our future and whether fate is finite or can we alter it. From beginning to end, this movie kept my attention with its deft pacing and laser focused direction. Set in the future, time travel has been outlawed. However, large criminal organizations were using it to send people back 30 years where a looper (time traveling assassin) would be waiting to kill them. Joe, played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Premium Rush, The Dark Knight Rises), was a smart looper; saving half of his earnings with the intention of moving to France one day. His plans were put into jeopardy the day his next kill arrived and it was an older Joe, played by Bruce Willis (Moonrise Kingdom, Red). Hesitating for a moment, the older Joe escaped and set out to change his past; with the young Joe in pursuit and the mob hunting both of them. If this sounds confusing to you, please do not worry; it will make more sense as you watch the movie. The story was fresh and original with skilled acting propelling everything forward. Joseph Gordon-Levitt was eerily good, looking like a young Bruce Willis. Bruce was back with his macho swagger; one could only imagine he thrived playing a well developed character for a change. Another important aspect was the part of Sara, played beautifully by Emily Blunt (The Five-Year Engagement, Your Sister’s Sister). Remembering the audience’s applause at the end of the film and how the rest of my weekend was great, my past really had an effect on my present. I just hope this movie starts a trend of making more creative, original movies in my future. Brief scenes of blood and violence.
3 1/2 stars
Flash Movie Review: Robin Hood
I do not want to be biased here; but when I hear the words Robin Hood, I think of Errol Flynn. I cannot think of anyone else playing this role besides him. When I received this DVD I assumed the story would have a different spin on it, due to the director being Ridley Scott (Prometheus, Black Hawk Down). More than a spin, the movie was a prequel to the Robin Hood story most of us have seen before. Robin Longstride, played by Russell Crowe (A Beautiful Mind, Gladiator), was an archer in King Richard’s army. Upon Richard’s death, Robin returned to England, to bring the sword of deceased Sir Robert Loxley, played by Douglas Hodge (Vanity Fair, Mansfield Park), to his father Sir Walter Loxley, played by Max von Sydow (The Exorcist, Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close). Hearing the news of his son’s death, Sir Walter Loxley convinced Robin to become his son, which would protect his land holdings. In doing so, Robin had to step in and become the husband to the widow Marion Loxley, played by Cate Blanchett (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Notes on a Scandal). With the English monarchy being threatened by the French, Robin would have to do battle with Sir Robert Loxley’s killer. Are you confused yet? It took me a while to get a grasp of what was taking place in this odd movie. I found Russell Crowe a poor choice; he brought no emotion to the role. Cate, on the other hand, was her usual stellar self. The story made no sense. An entire town was to believe Robin was Sir Robert Loxley? Also, having a battle scene that looked like it was copied from Private Ryan was weird. Instead of robbing from other movies, why couldn’t they make a decent story for us poor viewers? Violent and bloody scenes.
2 1/4 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: End of Watch
Breathe, breathe, keep breathing was what I had to keep reminding myself to do through this intense, gritty movie. There were times I was on the edge of my seat from the tense scenes and the mockumentary style of filming interspersed throughout, without the head shaking dizziness. Los Angeles policemen Brian Taylor and Mike Zavala, played by Jake Gyllenhaal (Source Code, Love and Other Drugs) and Michael Pena (The Lincoln Lawyer, Crash) were more than partners, they were as close to being brothers as any two men could be. They were young, cocky hotshots working the toughest part of the city; who made some spectacular, newsworthy busts. Things were going great with Officer Taylor dating Janet, played by Anna Kendrick (Up in the Air, 50/50) and Officer Zavala expecting a baby with his wife Gabby, played by Natalie Martinez (Death Race, Magic City Memoirs), when they became targeted by a drug cartel. This movie was one of the best examples of the police film genre I have ever seen. The script was tight, with electrifying tension being cut with stress relief comedic lines. Jake and Michael had killer chemistry between each other, giving this film a true sense of the camaraderie between partners. The acting was incredible; both Michael and Jake went through extensive training for this film and it paid off. They were believable; handling all the police hardware in a fluid, realistic way. I never felt as if the story was copping out (sorry for the pun), there were no neat and tidy scenes included just to please the audience. The movie grabbed you by the throat and forced you to watch ever single frame without any apologies. End of story. Graphic violence and bloody scenes.
3 2/3 stars
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