Author Archives: moviejoltz

Flash Movie Review: Loving Pablo

IS A PERSON JUST BEING GOOD to you enough to have a relationship with them? I have always had a curiosity about the things that are important to a person seeking and being in a love relationship. One of the things that piqued my curiosity was seeing news reporters interviewing the love interest of a person who had recently committed a crime or was in an altercation. Hearing the girlfriend say her boyfriend has always been good to her after he had just been accused of bludgeoning a man to death was the oddest thing to me. Let us say it was true, that he was kind and respectful of her; is that all one needs to fall in love? There seems to be more similar examples currently than I can recall years ago. A husband is stunned when he finds out his wife has been embezzling money from her place of employment for years. Behind the husband and reporter, parked in the driveway of the couple’s house, was a brand new expensive car. I find it all bizarre; how can someone only focus on certain aspects of an individual and base their affection solely on those features? I know I cannot do it.      IN MY WORLD ACTIONS HAVE AS much importance as words; in other words, it is not just what a person says that will cement my feelings towards them. I think anyone can say anything and I have been in relationships where the person said things they knew would pull at my heart strings. And the words did; however, there were things they did that did not earn my trust. I had friends who had warned me, but you know how that goes; unless they are in your shoes, you feel your friends are not able to see the whole picture. It is funny because I have been in their place where I expressed my concerns about friends’ love interests. There was one person who was a user, who only cared about himself. Yes, he would do these sweet things for my friend that made her heart swell; but he had no empathy and was a cheapskate. If the opportunity came up where she asked me for my opinion I would tell her exactly what I thought. The one thing I would not do is tell her what she “should” do; I knew she would have to figure out what worked for her. Also, I remained respectful around him. My motto is, “I do not have to accept anything, but need to respect it.” And when it comes to this biographical crime film, no truer words have been spoken. If not, one could find themselves getting killed.      DESPITE BEING COLOMBIA’S MOST NOTORIOUS DRUG LORD there was something about Pablo Escobar, played by Javier Bardem (The Sea Inside, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales) that made journalist and anchorwoman Virginia Vallejo, played by Penelope Cruz (The Counselor, Vicky Cristina Barcelona), fall in love with him. It wasn’t long before everyone knew. This film festival winning action movie also starred Peter Sarsgaard (Jackie, The Magnificent Seven) as Shepherd, Julieth Restrepo (At the End of the Spectra, Moria) as Maria Victoria Henao and Oscar Jaenada (The Shallows, Cantinflas) as Santoro. It goes without saying that Javier and Penelope were a perfect match since they are married to each other. I enjoyed the two of them in this story and picked up a couple of things I did not know about Escobar. However, the script was too superficial; I would have preferred if the writers went deeper into the characters. Instead there were scenes of blood and violence which were expected, but I felt there had to be more to this story than what was shown.

 

2 stars

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Flash Movie Review: Bad Times at the El Royale

IS THERE ANYONE WHO DOES NOT wonder where those stains and marks come from in a hotel room? I for one cannot ignore them when I see them. This is why I am never 100% comfortable when I am staying at a hotel. On a trip to the southwest I stayed at a hotel that was one of the tallest buildings in the city. When I walked into my room everything looked fine. Just like most hotels I have stayed in; this one had a bed, 2 nightstands, an armoire, a desk, an easy chair and a floor lamp. When I walked into the bathroom I was immediately horrified because there appeared to be a blood-stained streak on the shower curtain. My mind was flooded with scenarios that could have caused blood to get splattered in the bathroom. I was not going to attempt to clean it, nor could I simply ignore it. If that was not enough, I decided to relieve my bladder before going downstairs to request a room change. When I went to flush the toilet, the water gurgled inside the bowl but never flushed down; it looked as if the water was simmering close to a boil. I wasn’t about to wonder what was causing the toilet not to flush. The room and in turn the hotel creeped me out.      ON ANOTHER TRIP I BOOKED A ROOM in this huge, old majestic hotel. I do not remember the year the building was constructed, but it was originally built as an apartment building. With terra cotta appointments on the façade and a lobby that looked like it came out of 1920’s detective story, I thought the hotel was cool looking. The elevators with jet black doors and silver trim creaked as they traveled up the floors, slightly unsteady like an elderly patient. When I walked into the room I was met by a wall that had worn-out flocked wallpaper. As soon as one entered the room they had to make an immediate right turn to go into the living space. It appeared the original apartments must have been carved up to form the hotel rooms; the room had odd shaped corners and the bathroom door nearly grazed the toilet bowl when it was being closed. There was something about the hotel that made me think about the original residences who must have resided here earlier. During my stay little things happened such as the lightbulb burning out and the water faucet groaning whenever it was turned on. I stayed there despite the odd sounds and my concerns for my safety and hygiene. But I will tell you this; I would rather stay in either of the hotels I mentioned than the one in this mystery thriller.      A GROUP OF STRANGERS CHECKED INTO the El Royale but not all of them would check out. This dramatic crime film starred Jeff Bridges (Hell or High Water, Kingsman: The Golden Circle) as Father Daniel Flynn, Cynthia Erivo (Widows, Mr. Selfridge-TV) as Darlene Sweet, Dakota Johnson (Fifty Shades of Grey franchise, A Bigger Splash) as Emily Summerspring, Jon Hamm (Baby Driver, Million Dollar Arm) as Laramie Seymour Sullivan and Chris Hemsworth (Thor franchise, 12 Strong) as Billy Lee. I enjoyed the cast and the diversity of the characters they portrayed. This picture had a great look to it with a smoldering script, which allowed every actor a chance in the spotlight. I also liked the way the pieces of the story fit together; however halfway through I started to get bored. It seemed as if scenes were written with less detail and emotion. Sometimes it appeared shocking twists were put in for the sake of shocking the viewer. For me this was not as much of a thriller as a slow burn and I had no desire to book a room at this hotel.

 

2 ¼ stars

Flash Movie Review: Goosebumps 2: Haunted Halloween

IT WAS A BIG LOGISTICAL OPERATION THAT I was responsible for, though at the time I had never heard of the word “logistical.” My job was to plan out the route my friends and I would take for Halloween. I considered how long we would be able to stay outside, so persuaded everyone to get an early start for trick or treating. Each of us was dressed up in a costume; I was a pirate. The key to our success I determined was having a home base that was in the middle of the square mileage I envisioned we could cover. It turned out that central location was my house. The area I mapped out was 16 blocks in width and 12 blocks in length. Living in the city, this meant within our territory we would be covering houses, apartment buildings and businesses. In other words, we would be taking in a lot of candy. I broke down the blocks into four quadrants. We would focus on the southeast one first then come to my house to empty our candy filled bags before tackling the southwest quadrant and so on. I thought it was a brilliant plan that would yield massive amounts of candy. As it turned out the plan worked perfectly where all of us had enough candy to last us for months; we were overjoyed.      FAST FORWARD A FEW YEARS AND for some unexplained reason my desire to go trick or treating waned. I was not alone for my friends felt the same way. At some undetermined point in time we each lost interest in getting dressed up and going door to door to get candy. We still hung out together, starting at a friend’s house where we now found ourselves on the giving end of Halloween. My friend would answer the front door and hand out candy to the trick or treaters who were perched on his front porch with outstretched arms, shopping bags dangling from their hands. That was us a few years back, but now we were the “adults” handing out candy. We grew up I guess. It is funny how that happened; after years waiting and planning for our Halloween trek through the neighborhood, we now had no desire. Looking at some of the kids’ costumes I recalled how I used to sit and pour over the store catalog, looking for the perfect outfit. After having been a pirate, a vampire and a superhero; I now looked at this holiday with boredom. Even this adventure comedy couldn’t change my feelings.     WHILE CLEANING OUT AN OLD ABANDONED house Sonny and Sam, played by Jeremy Ray Taylor (It, 42) and Caleel Harris (Boys in Blue-TV movie, Skyward-TV), found a secret room that contained a single book. The boys did not know there was a reason the book had a lock on it. This family fright film also starred Wendi McLendon-Covey (Bridesmaids, Blended) as Kathy, Madison Iseman (Beauty Mark, Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle) as Sarah and Chris Parnell (21 Jump Street, Labor Pains) as Walter. Based on author R.L. Stine’s horror series, this sequel had some fun special effects in a retro type of way. There was something about this picture that reminded me of those Saturday afternoon matinee films I used to go to that were low end productions. With a mixture of slapstick and corny humor I felt this film would only entertain the youngest of viewers; it was rated PG. There was some creativity used for several scenes but overall, I was bored through most of the story. Growing up I was not a fan of candy corn; never liked getting them in my Halloween bag. For me, this picture was a dose of candy corn for the holiday.

 

1 ¾ stars

 

Flash Movie Review: First Man

DURING MY SPACE EXPLORATIONS I DISCOVERED planets far from earth that were inhabited by peaceful beings. The inhabitants of one planet did not walk; they were able to float above the ground effortlessly. Everyone was dressed in a similar fashion with a long, flowing robe-like outer coating that refracted light to form a non-stop palette of colors. I considered their heads to be egg shaped with large dark eyes and no hair. Because they were a peaceful race, there were a couple of other species from other planets that wanted to conquer them. Due to this threat the peaceful ones, as I called them, had to build up their defenses. I was in charge of the space ships that in actuality were different writing pens I collected; however, they were able to shoot out death rays from the tips. The pocket clip part of the pen is where the captain and their crew flew the ship, so I addressed my warnings to that part of the pen. I could spend hours flying my pens through the house as they took on evil forces, defending their home planet. Sometimes I had to fly through space dust or debris which was the mist from a can of air freshener.      IT WAS NOT UNTIL MY HIGHER LEARNING days that I paid more attention to space. Oh and of course Star Trek and Star Wars pushed me into that direction. To this day I enjoy science fiction/fantasy movies and books. I feel a certain connection to them because they have always presented a different reality to the dark one I was experiencing at times. Within science fiction stories it seemed as if a planet was being threatened, all the inhabitants would come together to defeat the threat. There was something about having diverse beings coming together that I found attractive. At the time, I did not realize it was what I was wishing for in my reality. Feeling like an outsider or just different growing up, the idea of an all accepting society fascinated me. I think that is why when I was a kid fantasizing about space I always had planets filled with peaceful beings. Add in the story lines from Star Trek and I was sure there was a safe haven somewhere in space. It is funny that a few of my friends to this day can tell when I am spacing out and the reasons for it. None of my fantasies however had the type of intensity that I saw in this dramatic, biographical space film.      IN A RACE WITH THE SOVIET Union to achieve glory in space, the United States embarked on a radical idea that had never been done before. It would take a certain type of person to be a part of what could become an event of historical proportions. This film festival nominated movie starred Ryan Gosling (Blade Runner 2049, La La Land) as Neil Armstrong, Claire Foy (Breathe, Unsane) as Janet Armstrong, Jason Clarke (Everest, The Man with the Iron Heart) as Edward Higgins White, Kyle Chandler (Manchester by the Sea, Argo) as Deke Slayton and Pablo Schreiber (13 Hours, Den of Thieves) as Jim Lovell. The beauty of this film was the way the director allowed scenes to tell the story without dialog; some of the film shots were beautiful. Now add in the acting skills, especially form Ryan and Claire, and I for the most part was taken away by the story. There have been a variety of space films but for some reason I found the intensity of this one to be tangible. Everything felt authentic and real. Though my imagination made traveling to space an easy process, I got on board for this historical event, space story.

 

3 1/2 stars       

 

Flash Movie Review: The Old Man and the Gun

THOUGH SHE APPEARED TO BE AN OLDER woman, I would never ask her age. She had been taking my yoga class for several weeks, bringing her own yoga mat and a bottle of water. Maybe I am stereotyping; but she had long gray hair pulled back into a ponytail that trailed halfway down her back, looking like a former hippie. Every week while I lead the class into warming up poses I provide a little distraction by listing celebrity birthdays for the week. One of the reasons I do this is to break the ice with any new participants who have that “new kid on the block” mentality, coming to class for the 1st time. I will ask the class if they know so-and-so, wait if anyone guesses what the celebrity did to make he/she famous, then reveal their age. So, this one week after I went through my list of celebrity birthdays, the older woman piped up it was also her birthday. I and the rest of the class wished her well. She then said she was happy to say she was 82 years old. I knew she was an older individual but honestly, I would never have guessed that was her age. She told us she loves yoga and has been doing it for decades; what an inspiration.      I WAS JUST AS FORTUNATE IN the work world to have met people like that woman in my yoga class. They loved their job, so they stayed employed way past their retirement age. At one of the companies I worked at, the owner came to work every day. He was always busy and kept this up way into his 90’s. There certainly is some truth in finding something you love or are passionate about to feel successful. I had a relative who would always say they were not going to work, they were going to play because they enjoyed what they did at their job. You know how some people are married to their work; where all they think and talk about is their job? Well they do not necessarily love what they do; they have formed an identity for themselves based on their occupation. The individuals I have referred to each have their identity in tack; they just want to continue what they do because they love it. I feel this way about doing my movie reviews and hope I can continue doing them for a long time because they bring me such joy. The same thing can be said about the main character in today’s comedic, crime drama.      FORREST TUCKER, PLAYED BY ROBERT REDFORD (The Natural, Truth); was good at what he did, besides getting immense joy out of it. The only downside was the consequences would be steep if he had a misstep. With Casey Affleck (A Ghost Story, The Finest Hours) as John Hurt, Sissy Spacek (The Help, Coal Miner’s Daughter) as Jewel, Danny Glover (Proud Mary, Back in the Day) as Teddy and Tom Waits (Seven Psychopaths, Down by Law) as Waller; this film festival nominee was based on a true story and what a story! Rumor has it this will be Robert’s last acting role. If it is he at least can end his chapter on a high note with this role. It was such a treat to watch him and Sissy, two seasoned actors, play off each other. The story started out slow for me but continued building itself up to a point where I was enjoying watching the mixture of emotions that took place on screen. It was obvious Robert was having a good time doing this character since it came across fully. I must give everyone who worked on this film credit; this will sound cheesy but if there was any labor involved in the making of this picture it was a labor of love.

 

3 stars  

Flash Movie Review: Monsters and Men

THIS HAPPENED A LONG TIME AGO, but I had a relative who was caught in the middle of a riot. He was a hands-on business owner, working at his store nearly seven days a week. I cannot remember the details if he knew there was going to be some type of trouble in the neighborhood or he simply got caught in the middle of the protesters, but he was working at the time the riots broke out. The protesters were throwing debris at storefront windows, overturning vehicles and setting fire to trash piles. He was afraid his store was going to get looted or worse, destroyed because he stocked alcoholic products. The store meant everything to him since it was his livelihood and the only thing he knew how to do. He made up his mind he would lock and barricade the doors, staying in the place until things calmed down. His family was distraught with the news when he called them; pleading with him to get out, but he refused. As far as he could see there was no one coming to calm the crowds down and he could not ask any of his employees to put themselves in danger by staying with him. He did not leave the store for three days.      ALL DURING THAT TIME THE ENTIRE family feared for his life. As far as any of us were concerned the people rioting were all bad and our relative was an innocent victim. I was too young to understand the reasons behind the crowds taking to the streets and damaging property. Looking back at that incident I realize two things: there had to be some legitimate reasons why people were angry and secondly, there were some individuals who saw an opportunity to wreak havoc in the neighborhood. When a violent act or tragedy takes place, people witnessing it may only see things at face value. They may not be interested with someone else’s concerns. Maybe that is part of the problem; it certainly seems more so these days from what I have seen and heard on the news. This may sound trite, but I find it so true; “You don’t know someone until you walk in their shoes.” Or what is that other saying that goes, “There are two sides to every story and the truth usually lies somewhere in the middle.” With more and more people responding to disagreements/conflicts with anger, thinking the louder they shout the more they will be heard, it is no wonder the world seems more like a scary place. This dramatic, film festival winner reminded me there is more to a story than what one sees for themselves.      THE KILLING OF A BLACK MAN by a Brooklyn police officer affected more than those who knew the two men. Starring Anthony Ramos (A Star is Born, White Girl) as Manny, John David Washington (BlacKkKlansman, Love Beats Rhymes) as Dennis, Kelvin Harrison Jr (The Birth of a Nation, It Comes at Night) as Zyric, Jasmine Cephas Jones (Blindspotting, Mistress America) as Marisol and Giuseppe Ardizzone (Boardwalk Empire-TV, Gotham-TV) as Officer Jim Gambini; I found the story gripping throughout the movie. This was writer and director Reinaldo Marcus Green’s first full length feature film and I found his script and direction new and fresh, considering the subject matter has been done before and is a current issue in society. I found the acting to be this raw realness that added to the tension I felt throughout the picture. This movie has the ability to allow the viewer to look at the bigger picture, pushing the boundaries beyond face value. Living near a city where violence occurs on a weekly basis, this story could have easily taken place here.

 

3 ½ stars

Flash Movie Review: Venom

IN SOME CULTURES, THE TERM TWO-SPIRIT is used to describe individuals who participate in a traditional third-gender ceremonial role in some of their customs. Before I learned this definition, I used it in the same way I used Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde to describe a person I perceived to be two-faced or moody. The person that comes to mind first when I think about this type of duality is a former boss of mine, when I worked in retail. To the shoppers that came into our store he was a charming, jovial gentleman. He would spend as much time as needed to make a sale, all the while complimenting more female customers than male. I did stock for the store, so was out in front numerous times to add product to the shelves. Without even looking at him I could tell what hand gestures he was using simply by the tone in his voice; it was this sickly-sweet drawl that went to a higher register. This is what I saw out front; but as soon as he walked into the back warehouse, he was a ranting mean man. It was nothing for him to call one of his employees stupid or dumb. If he did not like the way you were packing a box for shipment, he would yell and push you aside and ask someone else to take over. If only the people in the store could have seen him.      HE WAS ONLY ONE OUT OF a slew of people I have encountered in my life who showed two opposite sides to themselves. It is funny; since I believe we are born with both good and evil inside of us, you would think I would be immune to these contrasts in behavior. But you would be wrong because I feel humans have free choice to decide if they want to be good or bad. There are some individuals who thrive on negativity and have no issue displaying it, even if it comes out in a mean-spirited way. I do not have to look any further than my high school years. It was there that I can honestly say I saw some evil people. The entire time I was exposed to that craziness I kept wondering why those individuals chose to be that way, to be mean and hurtful. At the time I wasn’t aware abusers usually have been the victim to an abuser; not that it would have made anything better for me. What I would like to know is how people who have this good vs evil turmoil inside come to terms with it. This was one of the things I thought about as I sat and watched this action, science fiction film.      HIS LIFE GOING IN A DOWNWARD spiral Eddie Brock, played by Tom Hardy (Child 44, Mad Max: Fury Road), was willing to take a chance by sneaking into a top-secret laboratory. It was there he picked up something nasty. This horror movie also starred Michelle Williams (I Feel Pretty, The Greatest Showman) as Anne Weying, Riz Ahmed (Four Lions, Nightcrawler) as Carlton Drake, Jenny Slate (Gifted, Obvious Child) as Dr. Dora Skirth and Scott Haze (Midnight Special, Thank You for Your Service) as Security Chief Roland Treece. Not being familiar with this comic book character I had no idea what to expect from this story. Tom was excellent in the role, giving it his all; however, the script did not know whether to be a comedy, a horror or an action movie. It felt like the writers were trying to create something like Deadpool, but this was not done as well. I thought the story jumped around too much and I disliked the change of heart in one of the characters. Too bad the story and script were not more concise because the action scenes were exciting and some of the humor scored. How ironic to have a conflicted character playing in a conflicted story in a conflicted movie. There was an extra scene in the middle of the credits besides a trailer for a new animated Spider-Man movie.

 

2 stars   

Flash Movie Review: A Star is Born

I AM MORE OF A “don’t fix it if it isn’t broken” type of guy. As long as the item is meeting my expectations/needs, then I am fine with it. If you recall in one of my recent reviews I said, “Just because something is new does not make it better.” This is true to me based on the multiple examples I have experienced while buying replacement items. When my refrigerator finally stopped working I had to buy a new one. The salesperson had all these reasons why the newer refrigerators were so much better than mine. I originally asked if mine was fixable which led the salesperson to go into their sales pitch for the newer models. Granted, the ones I looked at were nicer looking, brighter inside and had a variety of shelf configurations I could adjust depending on what I needed to store inside. After I came to the realization that the cost to fix my old fridge would be better spent on buying a new one, I chose one similar to what I had and had it delivered. Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with my new refrigerator; but for some reason it does not seem I can fit as much food into it as my old one did.      MY PHILOSOPHY CAN BE EASILY APPLIED to movie remakes. If you look back at the reviews I did of movies that were remakes, you will not find many that were favorable. Just last week the film Little Women I reviewed was an updated version; it was one of the worst remakes I had seen in a long time. For the life of me I could not understand how the studio looked at that remake and thought they made a good picture. It makes me wonder where are the writers who have an original idea for a story? Honestly, I do not fully understand what the reasoning is behind the decision to do a remake of an established movie. Remember, don’t fix it if it isn’t broken; why would a studio want to take a well-known, classic film and do a remake of it? If the bar is already set up high, what are the studio’s chances of having a success? Maybe it is an economic decision, where if the 1st movie was successful then the new one has a built-in fan base. I do not have the answers, but I must tell you everything I just said about remade movies does not apply to this romantic, musical drama.      HAVING BEEN TOLD SHE WAS NEVER good enough Ally, played by Lady Gaga (Machete Kills, American Horror Story-TV), had no reason to believe famous music celebrity Jackson Maine’s, played by Bradley Cooper (American Sniper, Silver Linings Playbook) comments about her. There was only one way to show her. With Sam Elliott (The Hero, I’ll See You in my Dreams) as Bobby, Andrew Dice Clay (Blue Jasmine, Pretty in Pink) as Lorenzo and Anthony Ramos (Mobsters and Men, Patti Cakes) as Ramon; I was stunned with this being Bradley’s 1st stint as a writer and director. His direction was simple and pure which was a beautiful compliment to Lady Gaga’s expressive face. Acting was in top form from everyone, but I do have to say I forgot Bradley was playing Jackson Maine; he was that believable. Doing all the singing live was a brilliant decision because it added a vibrancy to the scenes that truly made them stand out. Now there were a few slow spots for me, but they were just a minor distraction that I did not mind much. This is the 4th time this story has been done in movie form and I believe this not only can stand on its own, but it shines the brightest.

 

3 ½ stars     

Flash Movie Review: Little Women

ON MY DAILY COMMUTE I TRAVEL through a variety of different neighborhoods and towns. It is pretty easy to tell which ones are more affluent and that surprises me. I do not understand the government workings that play into a place being more desirable than another one. From what I remember in my sociology courses less desirable locations are by expressways, railroad tracks and overhead electrical power lines. However, that does not explain the big picture to me about a town’s sociological and economic makeup. As I drive through these places I keep an eye open for any architectural treasure since it is one of my hobbies or you could say, passions. I enjoy watching construction sites, trying to figure out what is being created. When there has been an economic down turn, more buildings tend to be built in a no-frills style; at least that is my observation. When times are better, there seems to be more of a creative flair involved in the building of a house or commercial building. Though I understand it is a money thing, I am sad when an older structure that has charm or a style from a different era gets torn down to make way for something modern. Just because something is new does not mean it is better.      A PARTICULAR STRUCTURE I AM FOND of is the bungalow. It is a sturdy and practical building in my opinion. One of the neighborhoods I go through has row upon row of bungalows. I am always fascinated in the way the owners do subtle or dramatic changes to make their home stand out from the others. The only change that I find offensive is when the owners slice the roof off their house and add a 2nd floor addition that does not stay in the style of the original structure. Where the original house was made of brick, the boxy addition will be made of aluminum siding in an unnatural color that does not even match the lower portion. It is akin to placing a cake stand on top of a cake, is the way I see it. Some of these remodeling jobs either look like a spacecraft landed on top of the house or someone placed a package on top because it was too heavy to carry. They look ghastly to me. I am at least encouraged that recently one of the areas has formed a building committee exclusive to the preservation of their bungalows. Hopefully this will prevent these mashups of modern forms being plopped down on classic architecture; as I said before new does not equal better. And no truer words have been spoken to describe this latest update of Louisa May Alcott’s classic novel.     THE BOND BETWEEN FOUR SISTERS GETS tested as each one grows up and searches for her dream. This dramatic family film starred Lea Thompson (Back to the Future franchise, Some Kind of Wonderful) as Marmee, Sarah Davenport (The Hatred, Dusk) as Jo, Melanie Stone (Riot, Miracle Maker) as Meg, Ian Bohen (Teen Wolf-TV, Wyatt Earp) as Freddy and Lucas Grabeel (Switched at Birth-TV, Smallville-TV) as Laurie. I was surprised by how much I disliked this version of the story. The script was unappealing to the point I felt the sisters were simply caricatures of a previous movie, who only knew how to whine. Most of them did not seem real for the current setting they were placed in. There was little drama involved which only added to the dullness that washed over the script. You can call this a retelling, an update, a modern version; but if you cannot keep the viewer interested in the story, then what is the point of doing it in the first place?

 

1 ½ stars

Flash Movie Review: Hell Fest

BEFORE I TELL YOU ABOUT THE different tricks I was made aware of, I want to say in no uncertain terms I never did any of them nor would I condone such things. I do not want someone to read this and think one of the tricks would be a great thing to do; they are definitely not. With the holiday Halloween fast approaching I am reminded of the outrageous stunts a few students did when I was in school. One boy would take dog poop (I never knew if he even owned a dog), wrap it in newspaper, put it in front of a person’s front door, light it on fire, ring their doorbell, then run somewhere nearby to hide. When the person opened the door, the first thing they would do is stomp on the newspaper to get the flame out. I think you know what happened next; I do not have to elaborate any further, do I? Another student used to bake chocolate chip cookies to pass out to the trick or treaters; but instead of using chocolate chips, they would use brown colored laxatives that they cut up to look like chocolate chips. These examples are only a couple out of the ones I had heard about in school.      THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT HALLOWEEN THAT brings out the worst in people; I believe it. I had an apartment down in the city and every year I would stay indoors for this holiday because people would get crazy. I have wondered if there is some psychological thing about dressing up in a costume and taking on the persona of that character. It just seems as if people feel they can act out in ways they normally would not do. There was this one time I remember walking down a crowded street where it seemed as if everyone was in costume. One guy was dressed as Harpo Marx, the one with curly hair who never spoke but used a horn. He was going up behind people and scaring them with his horn; blasting it just before he would poke them in the buttocks with it. No one was safe since he was doing it to both men and women. I was surprised no one punched him. Seeing stuff like this was the reason why I decided to always stay home on this holiday; I do not want to deal with people acting out. Speaking of Halloween bringing out the worst in people, it evidently applies to movies because this film would be a good example of it.      WHEN A TRAVELING FRIGHT SHOW OPENS in town, a serial killer finds the perfect place to feed his needs. Everyone attending will think he is part of the show. This horror picture starred Bex Taylor-Klaus (The Last Witch Hunter, Scream: The TV Series) as Taylor, Reign Edwards (The Bold and the Beautiful-TV, MacGyver-TV) as Brooke, Amy Forsyth (Beautiful Boy, The Path-TV) as Natalie, Courtney Dietz (Vampire Academy-TV, The Gifted-TV) as Britney and Christian James (Dollface, Freefall-TV) as Quinn. Because I was told it is always better to start out saying something positive before a negative, I will say I enjoyed the last scene of this movie. Up until that time I was bored senseless. The acting was pitiful, the script was void of reason, there was nothing that I had not seen done better before; I felt the writers only used an outline as a script without doing anything creative. Every scene was predictable, so there was never a point where I got surprised. How many times do I need to see an axe being swung into a chest or a syringe stuck into an eyeball? If this is the caliber of movies coming out for Halloween I vote we fast forward to Thanksgiving.

 

1 ½ stars    

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