MOST INDIVIDUALS CONSIDERED HIM THE LIFE of the party and I suppose to the untrained eye he was; however, there was something about him that did not set right with me. If I were asked to describe him in one word, I would have used the word “manic.” When he was “on” there was no off switch; he would remain the focus of attention for the entire night. Whether it was a couple of people or a large party, he was always set to put on a performance. I will say he could be quite funny at times, but sometimes people just wanted to chill out and not be forced to play his fall guy or enthusiastic audience member. I use the word enthusiastic because if you did not play along to his style of humor, he would be quick to pounce on you; of course, in a humorous way just to get more laughs out of the situation. Whenever we were at the same event, I always made sure I was off to the side, somewhere on the edge of his peripheral vision. I discovered if I was not in his direct line of fire, which mostly was everything in front of him, I could get by without being pulled into his show.      THE AMOUNT OF ENERGY HE WOULD expend during his performances was not natural; I was convinced there had to be something fueling him on, because rarely was there anyone who could do such a feat without artificial help. In a period of 2-3 years of his over the top personality, I noticed a change taking place in him. His complexion had drained into paleness and his weight loss had become noticeable. You might recall my philosophy of there being no accidents, there is a reason for everything? I was at the right place at the right time when I made a comment to a close friend of his about the physical differences I had noticed. It was as if I had the key to open up her feelings because she teared up as she told me how concerned she was about her friend. It turned out my suspicions were correct because she said she was certain he was addicted to a street drug. I did not take any pleasure in being right; a coat of sadness enclosed me as I tried to comfort her. She explained she was trying to convince him to seek out help but all he would do is promise her then continue on with his day. I felt sad for her and him, telling her she could not do it alone; it would take a major near-death experience or sudden change in the way people respond to his antics. To give you an idea of what it felt like being around him, I was getting the same feelings I used to experience back then as I watched the main character in this film festival winner.      BEING THE FRONT PERSON TO A PUNK rock band required a great deal of energy. Luckily for Becky, played by Elisabeth Moss (The Invisible Man, The Handmaid’s Tale), she had an unlimited amount of help from the things she would ingest. With Cara Delevingne (Paper Towns, Suicide Squad) as Crassy Cassie, Dan Stevens (The Guest, Beauty and the Beast) as “Dirtbag” Danny, Agyness Deyn (Clash of the Titans, Sunset Song) as Marielle Hell and Virginia Madsen (Dune, Burn Your Maps) as Ania Adamcyzk; this music drama’s prime focus was Elisabeth’s performance. She was eerily excellent in the role which only made me uncomfortable to watch what was happening to her through the story. The script did not do her any favors because I felt many scenes were repetitive. It was not until the last third of the movie where I felt fully engaged with what was taking place. Honestly, there really were not any surprises in this story; but, with Elisabeth’s convincing performance I could not look away from the train wreck that was taking place right before my eyes.

2 stars