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Flash Movie Review: The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones
All of us I am sure have encountered people who turned out to be someone totally different than who they claimed to be. It goes without saying that type of revelation has broken many hearts. I find these types of individuals to be learning lessons for us, no matter how painful it may have been to learn the lesson. But have you ever considered that these people may only be one definition of beings that affect our daily lives? Think about it; what if two elevators open up for you at the same time and in a split second you switch and take the one on the left instead of the right side. As you rise up to your designated floor; unbeknownst to you, the other elevator became stuck between floors, trapping its passengers for a couple of hours. How about that split decision you made to wait an extra 30 minutes for a ride home instead of walking through an unfamiliar area only to discover later a crime had been committed along the route you would have taken. These things could be attributed to our intuition, internal voices or maybe from some being watching over us. I believe anything is possible and that concept is what attracted me to this action, fantasy film. Lily Collins (The Blind Side; Mirror, Mirror) played Clary Fray, who lived with her artist mother Jocelyn, played by Lena Headey (Dredd, Game of Thrones-TV). When Clary began to doodle the same odd symbol over and over, it set into motion a discovery that was kept hidden by her parents, finally explaining the strange things she had been seeing. Jonathan Rhys Meyers (August Rush, Match Point) as Valentine, was the best character out of the cast for me. Lily was ok for the most part but I did not understand why she had to wear the outfit she was wearing through most of the movie. Based on the acclaimed book series by Cassandra Clare, I can appreciate the task of staying true to the story. I felt so many characters and things were being crammed into this adventure film that I never got a sense for any of them. It became a series of altercations that were nothing special. Jamie Campbell Bower (Twilight franchise, Winter in Wartime) as Jace did not have the physical presence to be a lead character as far as I was concerned. I liked the concept of the story but there was no life to this movie. If the people responsible for creating this film were basing their decisions on their inner voices, they were listening to the wrong ones.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters
There were two things that stoked my imagination when it came to mythology. One was the original movie of Jason and the Argonauts. Watching those fantastical creatures battle Jason was something that sparked endless imaginary battles in my head. I would use Jason as a decoy while I was the one who found the Golden Fleece. The other object that gave me a new appreciation for myths was the book Mythology by Edith Hamilton. Growing up it was required reading in school; everyone I knew had to read it. The idea that there were these beings living among us, who did not quite fit in, was something I could strongly identify with. If only I could have found a place like Camp Half-Blood that was featured in this fantasy film. Logan Lerman (The Perks of Being a Wallflower, The Number 23) once again reprised his role of Percy Jackson, the son of Poseidon. When the security system protecting the children of gods and goddesses staying at Camp Half-Blood was neutralized, Percy and his friends decided to go out on a mission to seek the one item that could restore and protect their home from evil forces–the Golden Fleece. I thought the concept of this story was a good idea; setting it in current times with typical teenagers who had special gifts. Logan, as he has done in his past films, came across as a likable character; one you did not want to see get into harm’s way. Others in the cast such as Alexandra Daddario (Hall Pass, Texas Chainsaw 3D) as Annabeth, Douglas Smith (Blast From the Past, Antiviral) as Tyson and Jake Abel (I Am Number Four, The Lovely Bones) as Luke were nothing memorable. The special effects could have been better I thought. Ultimately for a story that had multiple opportunities to amaze and surprise me fell flat. I have a feeling the book this adventure film was based on would have been a better choice to spark my imagination, just like when I was kid.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Smurfs 2
Sequels are unusual due to the fact they suffer from a personality disorder. When they are done well, the movie viewer is able to take fresh fond memories and store them with the seasoned ones that are already up in a cupboard of their mind. I feel a closer connection to the characters after I see a good sequel; for example, Ironman or Before Midnight. In a way it feels as if I caught up with an old friend. There are some movies that should never have a sequel because the original movie was classic, such as Sleeping Beauty, Pinnochio or Lawrence of Arabia. It would be upsetting to see a sequel that soiled the pristine features of an iconic film. Out of all the sequels there is a certain group that I consider the most offensive. These are the ones that were made as an afterthought because the movie studio was surprised with the large revenue generated from the first film. To me the movie sequels in this group are only there because of greed. Case in point is this movie. First of all, are Smurfs even relevant these days? I do not know anyone whose children have some kind of Smurf branded item. In this sequel the evil wizard Gargamel, played by Hank Azaria (Godzilla, Love & Other Drugs), has created two mischievous creatures called the Naughties. The one thing missing to complete them for his evil plan was in a secret formula. The only way he could get his hands on it was to kidnap Smurfette, voiced by Katy Perry. The Smurfs would need their human friends Patrick and Grace Winslow, played by Neal Patrick Harris (Undercover Brother, How I Met Your Mother-TV) and Jayma Mays (Red Eye, Glee-TV), to foil Gargamel’s plan. The story was made up of a series of one-liners and sight gags. There was no character development which attributed to the blase acting. Hank was the only actor that looked like he was trying to act and make the best of the pathetic script. In regards to Brendan Gleeson (Safe House, Gangs of New York) as Patrick’s stepdad Victor, I was simply embarrassed for him. I can only assume Neal was under contract because with his string of hosting successes there would be no reason to sully that with this poor sequel. The best parts of this comedy movie were the animation and outdoor scenes of Paris; the worst part was everything else. On a sad note it was touching to see the dedication to Jonathan Winters who voiced Papa Smurf. The sadness was because this film had to be his final performance. If you plan on seeing the film, then stay through to the end of the credits.
1 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: R.I.P.D.
It is not healthy for me to ignore my cravings. If it involves a particular food, I know if I do not satisfy my yearning, I will only wind up eating other things that will not be gratifying to me. What would make the situation worse is if I could not find the right item; I am sure this has happened to many of you. That urge, let us say, for a chocolate chip cookie; where your mind races to figure out the fastest way you can get one of those decadent, lovely circular mounds of soft moist dough that have accepted the requests from those deep rich chocolate chips to come settle down and plant roots on their pliable land–aahhhh. Imagine how it feels when you finally find a place that sells these cookies, buy one and on your first bite your taste buds are assaulted by a dry, unsweetened, hard pice of crumbling sawdust. You were taken in by a horrible imposter. Well, that is the same feeling I had watching this poor excuse for a science fiction/fantasy film. Recently slain police officer Nick, played by Ryan Reynolds (Safe House, Just Friends) found himself sitting in front of Proctor, played by Mary-Louise Parker (Red franchise, Solitary Man), the Unhuman Resources Manager for the Rest In Peace Department. Being given the option to go back to Earth, Nick agreed to join the force so he could find his killer. Accompanying him was veteran officer Roy, played by Jeff Bridges (True Grit, Crazy Heart). The story was a cut and paste job that took parts from Men in Black, Ghost and Ghost Busters. Unfortunately the writers did nothing to enhance or update the stories; so, I am at a loss to understand why they bothered with this movie. There was such a great opportunity to inject humor into this film; if only the writers had played up the human forms of NIck and Roy. Those alive would see Roy as a young, voluptuous blonde-haired woman and Nick as an elderly Asian man. It would have been funny to see more of these two characters in the crazy stunts that happened to them. The special effects were fine and I was so surprised to see Kevin Bacon (Mystic River, Sleepers) in the movie as Hayes. He was not in any of the trailers I had seen. Maybe the whole purpose of the film was so Jeff and Ryan could be added into the trail of seven degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon. After sitting through this film I came home and popped a DVD in of a good science fiction movie to watch and satisfy my craving.
1 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Wolverine
Longing for a lost love can be akin to waiting for an end of season plant to bloom again. It can no longer give you what you need. The memories of their scent that would linger after they left the room; the brilliance of their smile, that would burst upon their face; even the way they could calm you with just a look; all of these things can prevent one from moving on. At the time it is hard to realize those petals of memories, which return to the earth, will be the nourishment needed to make a new relationship grow. That sense of loss was apparent throughout this adventure film as movie viewers witnessed the internal struggles that plagued Logan/Wolverine, played by Hugh Jackman (The Prestige, Les Miserables). Flying to Japan to visit an old friend, Logan found himself thrown into the middle of a plot to wrestle control of the family fortune away from his friend. For someone not familiar with the character Wolverine, they may find themselves somewhat confused with several scenes in this action film. I will say Hugh poured himself into this role. The amount of time and work he put in to transform himself into his character was impressive. Because of his presence, I felt the director took more time filming the fight scenes; they stood out from the other parts of the movie. There was a flair to them that briefly reminded me of the classic Errol Flynn and Basil Rathbone sword fight in The Adventures of Robin Hood. The issue I had with this movie was the uneven story. I felt the love interest angle rang false and unnecessary. Newcomer Rila Fukushima as Yukio was an interesting character as Logan’s guide. I did not understand the role of Viper, played by Sventlana Khodchenkova (Tinker Tailer Soldier Spy, Mala Moskwa); her motivations were not clear to me. The main focus of this film was placed on the action and I will say it carried my interest through the parts of the movie I found confusing. A valiant effort was made to make this film the seed for a blooming sequel. Make sure you stay through the first set of credits. Several brief scenes contained blood in them.
2 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Turbo
Dreams are the fuel that propel us forward on our life’s journey. They instill a sense of hope that helps us traverse the choppy waters we may encounter along the way. I still can recall one of my earliest dreams of what I wanted to be when I grew up: a window washer. There was something about being on the outside, way up high, that appealed to me. Good thing I did not follow through since these days I am exactly opposite, preferring to be inside and close to the ground. Even though my dreams evolved, I have always been aware how they have pushed me forward in life. The same could be said for the main character in this animated film. Garden snail Turbo, voiced by Ryan Reynolds (Buried, The Proposal), dreamed he would one day race at the Indianapolis 500. No one would take his dream away from him; including his sensible brother Chet, voiced by Paul Giamatti (Win Win, The Last Station). When a freak accident gave Turbo the ability to move fast, he was not going to let anyone or anything stop him from achieving his dream. This adventure film had a diverse cast of actors to voice the many characters. For example, there was Michael Pena (End of Watch, Shooter) as Tito, Samuel L. Jackson (Django Unchained, Pulp Fiction) as Whiplash, Bill Hader (Men in Black 3, Saturday Night Live-TV) as Guy Gagne and Snoop Dog (Old School, Bruno) as Smooth Move. Though the animation was quite good, I found the story was lacking a couple of key elements. I did not find it exciting except for the beginning and ending parts. The characters were okay but really did not leave any impression on me. It felt as if the characters were created as a way to sell toys to kids. Compared to other animated films I have recently seen, this one just left me with a blah feeling. I think only young children would enjoy this movie. It was a shame the movie studio could not dream up a better story. Stay through the first set of credits.
2 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: World War Z
Evolution may not be working in our favor after all. So many times I have heard, the only thing that will still be around centuries from now will be insects–cockroaches in particular. With an increased threat coming from newly discovered super bacteria and aggressive diseases, one has to wonder how safe mankind will be on this planet. I have already taken precautions by not letting anyone use my pen or telephone and I avoid all salad bars and buffets. Now according to this movie there is an even bigger threat to all of us. In one of the better suspenseful openings I have seen in an action movie, I was swept up into the drama of this story. Brad Pitt (Killing Them Softly, Moneyball) played United Nations investigator Gerry Lane. About to take a road trip with his wife Karin, played by Mirelle Enos (Gangster Squad, The Killing-TV), and their two children; Gerry would have to abandon them when Assistant Secretary General Thierry Umutoni, played by Fana Mokoena (Hotel Rwanda, Safe House), requested Gerry’s help in tracking down the source of the zombie attack on Philadelphia. Brad was very good playing a stoic, older action figure persona in this adventure film. The other stand out for me was Daniella Kertesz (Loving Anna-TV, Ha-Emet Ha’Eroma-TV) as Segen, the soldier assigned to protect Gerry. In the beginning of the movie, I found the special effects incredible as this constant tidal wave of zombies came across the movie screen. The surprise was how the director kept up the tension and suspense without the need of blood and gore, to scare the audience. Unfortunately, a film cannot sustain itself without a solid story and here was the wink link. I never really understood what Gerry had done for the United Nations that led him to be their “go to” man. The world aspect of this story was great, but there was no depth; it started to become one chase scene after another, after another. I heard the book was quite different then this movie. Also, the ending had to be re-written and reshot. It appeared as a lead-in for a sequel. The use of scientific logic in this film was a brilliant idea…and a scary one at the same time. There were a couple of brief scenes with blood.
2 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Monsters University
An evil presence lived in my bedroom closet. I would only hear it at night when I was a little boy. It would make a creaking sound as if a giant’s foot was stepping out of the closet to eat me. One of my defenses was to hide under my blanket and be very still. The other was to make pretend spiders out of black construction paper and place them on the floor, in front of the closet door. They used to do a good job; so good, that I accidentally scared one of my brothers, when I left one of the spiders on the floor. As I grew up it dawned on me that what I was really afraid of was the unknown. It would have been a big help if this animated comedy had been around back then. A film that showed monsters going to school to learn how to scare humans was a wonderful idea. For those of us who saw Monsters, Inc this was the opportunity to visit with a younger Mike Wazowski and James P. Sullivan, voiced by Billy Crystal (Parental Guidance, Analyze This) and John Goodman (Argo, Flight). If you are not familiar with their story, it will not be a major factor in watching this film. A few sly references would be missed. However, the charm and originality of the previous movie was also missing. The story took a little part from the movies Carrie and The Hunger Games, minus the frightening parts. I believe young children will still enjoy this movie; though, I did notice the kids were noisier here than at other animated family films I have seen. Billy and John were perfect voicing their characters again, as was Steve Buscemi (Rampart, Broadwalk Empire-TV) as Randy. The addition of Helen Mirren (Red, Hitchcock) as Dean Hardscrabble was my favorite character. Though there was a little less magic and a little less fun in it for me, I still enjoyed finding out how monsters learned to be scary. Stay through the end of the credits.
2 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: This is the End
This may come as a surprise but it turns out celebrities do not walk on water, even though some of them think they do. Part of the problem is the public’s fascination with these bigger than life characters. I do not understand why people will buy merchandise simply because their favorite celebrity endorsed it. Now I know some of you must be thinking who am I to talk with me contributing to actors’ bank accounts by going to see their movies. All I can say is I watch movies for medicinal reasons; they are therapeutic for me. This does not mean I approve of celebrities acting out in public. As far as I am concerned; there is no difference between them and the rest of us, they have the same body functions as we do. If a celebrity should fall on hard times, there are some people who get a sense of satisfaction in seeing these stars brought down to human level. Now if you want to laugh at a celebrity’s predicament and not feel guilty about it, this is the movie to watch. Essentially playing themselves I admired all the actors who took part in this wickedly funny comedy. Even those who only had cameo roles helped to knock down this facade or fascination we might have about their public personas. During a party at James Franco’s (Oz the Great and Powerful, Spring Breakers) house, what was originally thought of as an earth tremor turned into something of catastrophic proportions. I was taken by surprise by how good the writing was for this part parody, part satire, crazy fantasy film. Too many stars to list, the major players were Seth Rogen (The Green Hornet, Pineapple Express), Jonah Hill (21 Jump Street, Superbad), Jay Baruchel (Tropic Thunder, Knocked Up), Craig Robinson (Peeples, The Office-TV) and Danny McBride (Up in the Air, Your Highness). I have to give a shout out to Michael Cera (Juno, Youth in Revolt) and Emma Watson (Harry Potter franchise, My Week with Marilyn) for their small hilarious roles. Though some of the jokes got tiresome, who knew the end could be so funny. Warning: Strong and crude language used throughout the film.
3 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Epic
The best part of the forest for me is the darkest place. Passing the wooden sentries, I look for the area where leaves have formed a confetti sky above me. In the quiet stillness, when the sun is at the right angle, a single ray of light will infiltrate the darkness. I love to see that single bright strand illuminate a tiny patch of ground; noticing almost microscopic sized, feathery objects floating briefly through the light. It is wonderful to witness; seeing the forest teaming with life. In this animated adventure, the forest was home to a magical world of creatures. Christoph Waltz (Django Unchained, Carnage) was flawless voicing the evil leader Mandrake. With the fate of the forest dangling in the balance, Mandrake was determined to overcome the forest’s protector Queen Tara, played beautifully by Beyonce Knowles (Dreamgirls, Cadillac Records). The basic story was about good and evil. What set this one apart from others was its creativity. First there was the imaginative and colorful characters of the forest. Next was the use of actors with distinctive voices like Colin Farrell (Total Recall, Seven Psychopaths) as Ronin and Amanda Seyfried (Mamma Mia, The Big Wedding) as Mary Katherine. I never thought in my lifetime I would hear Steven Tyler of Aerosmith voice a cartoon character as he did here, playing Nim Galuu. The movie was stunning to watch and had an engaging soundtrack, thanks to American composer Danny Elfman (Men in Black franchise, The Nightmare Before Christmas). While I was watching this film I was aware the children in the audience were sitting quietly, intently watching the screen. There was action, comedy, adventure and romance; something for everyone. The next time I walk through a forest, there will be no way I cannot think about the memorable creatures from this fantasy world.
3 stars
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