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Flash Movie Review: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Deep in the recesses of your mind, unbeknownst to you, is a fond memory from your childhood. No matter what kind of early life was experienced, there usually is at least one thing you recall fondly. The trigger that ignites this memory could easily be one of the most innocuous things on the planet. When you encounter this catalyst the deeply embedded memory rises to the surface of your mind like a deep sea diving bell. This recently happened to me when I saw an old-fashioned candy called Dots in a 3 year old’s hand. The sweet treat has multicolored hard drops of candy stuck on a strip of paper that looks like it belongs in a cash register. One could remove each candy piece with their fingertips; but if one wanted to be real cool, they would use their teeth to peel the candy off the strip of paper. As soon as I saw that candy the memory of the candy store where I always bought those Dots appeared at the edges of my eyes. A tiny place planted on the corner of the block, the shop owner was oversized with arms that gave the warmest hugs. I had forgotten how safe and happy I was whenever I was in her store; the memory flooded me with a sense of calm, joyful peacefulness. JUST as I relived that memory so will many of you experience a past time in your life when you see this reboot of the warrior turtles. With New York City under siege by sinister forces, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were forced above ground in what would be the ultimate test for all of their past training. This action adventure had modern CGI technology working in its favor. The chases and fights were tight and big. Starring Megan Fox (Transformers franchise, Jennifer’s Body) as April O’Neil and Will Arnett (When in Rome, Arrested Development-TV) as Vernon Fenwick, this was where this comedy film quickly deteriorated. Besides being annoying the script was filled with lame jokes and references. The story was at a television cartoon level and though I did not necessarily have an issue with it, after a short time I felt the scenes lacked any real excitement. If it was not for the fight scenes I would have been even more bored than I already was with this movie. I feel once viewers who remember the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles see this film they will discover their memories were better than these updated characters. For those who did not follow the Ninja Turtles, they may find this was a picture that will soon be forgotten.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Fluffy Movie
Everybody has one in their family or in their circle of friends. There usually is one person; though there may be more, who is the funny one, the jokester. Depending on the structure of the group this person may be the one who does the most outrageous things or the most daring among the individuals. On the other hand it could be a less dramatic person who has a sly wit or satirical slant to their humor. To me these folks play an important part within the group. If one had a choice to feel happy or sad, the majority would choose happy I would think. From my experiences I have always been exposed to humor in almost every type of situation. Of course not during a tragic event; however, there would be traces that would eventually filter out during a time of sadness. A large portion of the humor I have heard within my family has been done through the telling of stories. There is nothing like listening to a person talk about an experience they had, who can put a funny twist on the events. It is a gift when a person not only can find the humor in a situation but spin it so that another person finds it relatable. GABRIEL Iglesias (A Haunted House 2, Magic Mike) is such a person and I had no idea he was a stand-up comedian; I only knew his face from a role he played in a movie. Directed by Manny Rodriguez (Soul Train Awards-TV, Jimmy Kimmel Live!-TV), this movie was the filmed version of Gabriel’s sold-out concert tour titled “Unity Through Laughter.” The advertisements for this comedy picture state there is “never before seen footage.” The first thing I have to say about this movie is about the title; I loved the use of the word Fluffy instead of the “F” word. Since I never utter that word I will spell it for you: F-A-T; such a disgusting word. Next, because this was my first time experiencing Gabriel doing his act, I found him to be an easy likable guy. His use of accents and the sound effects he made were quick and precise. I enjoyed both watching and listening to him as he spun his humorous tales. Though I did not find anything that made me laugh out loud, I did smile and chuckle numerous times. The part I really liked about his act was the fact he did not resort to strong language to amuse people; that takes talent these days in my opinion. Entertained through the entire movie, I was surprised by the vulnerability he showed from time to time. If your group of friends or family is missing a funny person, Gabriel would be a positive addition to it.
2 1/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Wish I Was Here
At some point nearly everyone has to cross the intersection of uncertainty. It may happen when you are about to become a responsible adult; for others, it could be when you come upon that mental juncture between what you do in life as opposed to what you want to do. There are so many variables on when we travel up to that crossroads during our lifetime. I have heard many people complain about their job and how it does not fulfill them; it simply is a means to earning an income. However, when they reach this intersection during their life they pause a moment to question if this is all their life will ever be. I am a firm believer in doing something you love which will nourish you. A previous job is what I credit for pushing me to explore and teach yoga. Back then my days lost color, faded into a monotone of gray colors. All I did was work, eat and sleep then repeat it all over the following day. I felt I was on a one speed treadmill with no off switch. It was during that time I realized I needed physical and mental stimulation; otherwise, I felt I was going to wither off the vine of life and be discarded in time. TIME seemed to be slipping away for struggling actor Aidan Bloom, played by Zach Braff (Oz the Great and Powerful, Scrubs-TV). Finding himself at a crossroads when his father Gabe, played by Mandy Patinkin (The Princess Bride, Chicago Hope-TV), took ill and could no longer help out financially, Aidan had to take a hard look at his life and how he would provide for his family. Directed and co-written by Zach, this comedic drama had some good elements. I thought the cast all worked well together, especially Kate Hudson (Almost Famous, Bride Wars) as Aidan’s wife Sarah, Joey King (Looper, The Crazies) as his daughter Grace and Josh Gad (Jobs, The Internship) as his brother Noah. There was an understated humor through several scenes, nothing out loud or outrageous. The multitude of story lines was the issue I had with this film. They cast a wide net, allowing many viewers the opportunity to find something relatable; however, it was way too much for me and congested the underlying story. I never found a strong connection to anything in the movie; I became uninterested and left with a blah feeling towards the whole picture. With all the movies I have seen I cannot imagine I have reached a crossroads in my reviewing. Nah, I still love what I am doing; I just wish some of the people who worked on this film felt the same way.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: And So it Goes
It takes real effort for a person to act mean. Because everyone has the potential for good and evil I believe, it comes down to making choices. For example the brother who invites all but one sibling to his son’s special event or the person in the elevator who sees you running towards them and does nothing to prevent the doors from closing just as you are about to reach them. These people were acting mean in my opinion. Now there are some individuals who look mean, display a tough exterior, but beneath it they are completely sweet. I have a friend who cuts an imposing figure. Well over 6 feet tall and bulky, the irises of his eyes are as black as his pupils. His pale complexion only intensifies the glare of his deep set eyes when he is looking at you. I have seen many strangers move out of his way when he is walking down the street. Once you are familiar to him, his piercing eyes look more like the button eyes on a stuffed teddy bear and his physical size diminishes into soft edges. I know meanness can be based on a person’s perception; but unless one has evidence, don’t you think most people determine if someone could be mean by the way they look? BEING mean was what realtor Oren Little, played by Michael Douglas (Last Vegas, Falling Down), thrived on when he had to deal with people. All he wanted to do was sell one last big property so he could retire. His plans were blown when the granddaughter he never knew he had Sarah, played by Sterling Jerins (The Conjuring, World War Z), was dumped at his front door. Not interested in the 9 year old girl Oren tried to push her off on his neighbor Leah, played by Diane Keaton (The Godfather franchise, Mad Money), so he could continue on his way. Just how mean could Oren remain towards the two females? This comedic drama was utterly predictable which was why I gave you more information about the movie than usual. I found it sad that Michael and Diane were both stuck with the script; it did not offer one single new thing. Directed by Rob Reiner (The Bucket List, When Harry Met Sally), there just was not much one could do to try and make this film pleasurable. The crowd in the theater who were all older had an equal mix of positive and negative comments as they were exiting at the end of the movie. I know the movie studio was not trying to be mean by boring me for the duration of this picture; however, they were not very nice to make a poorly written film.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Magic in the Moonlight
Early exposure to the art of magic gives us permission to draw outside the lines. When we see something that defies logic it opens us up to accepting additional possibilities to a situation. Some people may say this directly affects our minds, while others will say it definitely stirs our hearts; either way magic certainly can influence us. I can remember my first exposure to magic (not taking into account peek-a-boo) happened when I was nearly 3 years old. There was a relative who would always grab my nose then show it to me sticking out from their closed fingers. I would inhale as much air as my little lungs could hold, to try and get back my nose. It wasn’t long before I realized by relative’s thumb and not my nose was poking out between his clenched fingers. There was another relative however who really performed magic or at least I thought so. Anytime he was visiting he would come up to me and ask me what was sticking out of my ear. I would rub my ear but never found anything. He would reach down, touch my ear then show me the quarter he pulled out before handing it to me. I would always check my ears afterward to see if I could find any money in them, but never did. BELIEVE it or not magic played a central character in this dramatic comedy. Written and directed by Woody Allen (Sweet and Lowdown, Midnight in Paris), this romantic film was about a magician and a soothsayer. Colin Firth (The Railway Man, A Single Man) played Stanley, a man who pretended to be a Chinese magician. When not in costume Stanley was considered the expert in disproving psychics and fortune-tellers. Hearing news about a young, incredible soothsayer named Sophie, played by Emma Stone (Easy A, The Amazing Spider-Man franchise), Stanley set out to show the world she was a fake. Both the music and sets were beautiful in this movie that depicted a bygone era. I thought the acting was quite good, especially from Jackie Weaver (Silver Linings Playbook, Animal Kingdom) as Grace. There were 2 major issues I had with this picture. The first had to do with Colin and Emma; their characters did not come across as a believable couple. Yes they both acted well but I found the idea of them being in any type of relationship just odd. My other concern was the story itself. Though the concept was good, the execution came across a bit tired to me. It felt more like a rehash of Woody’s previous films. There were times I found this film dull. For a movie about magic, I really wished it would have magically taken me out of my theater seat and into its story.
2 1/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Sex Tape
More than likely it is not its intentions, but life’s daily requirements can put an added burden on living. It can be tough on one person; however, if there are more people involved it can be harder. I have seen and been a victim to the aftermath of a relationship that suffered under the weight of life’s pressures. Some people can lose motivation and become lethargic. They may become depressed, feeling as if they are running on a torturous racetrack without an exit ramp. No matter how in love two people are, there is always a big adjustment when they form a union and begin to share responsibilities. It is similar to living in a balloon where the two of you are working hard to keep it inflated with your dreams, aspirations and hopes; but the outside world keeps demanding too much time from you and with you being occupied, your balloon begins to show signs of soft loose wrinkles. I now know going into a relationship my hectic schedule presents an immediate challenge. My class time depletes the finite amount of free time I have available to socialize. This is why I feel it is extra important to communicate and make sure I setup down time where the two of us can come to a place where we can talk, share, express and experience life in a way that adds to our growth. ANNIE and Jay, played by Cameron Diaz (There’s Something about Mary, The Other Woman) and Jason Segel (This is 40, The Muppets), were at a similar place in their relationship in this comedy film. The energy they wanted to devote to each other was being used towards their jobs and children, leaving little time to be romantic. To help in that department, Annie and Jay came up with the idea to film themselves being romantic; but a screwup made their lovemaking public on the internet. The mortified couple would have to go to extreme measures if they wanted to keep their dignity. Here is an instance where the movie trailer tells it all. Though the setup to the movie was good, nothing else was offered but a series of stunts to garner a laugh. I chuckled at a couple of things, but I did not find anything different or original to make me laugh. Rob Lowe (The Invention of Lying, The West Wing-TV) as Hank was the most fun character out of the cast. If you feel this movie will offer you some relief from your daily grind then by all means go see it; personally, I would find a better diversion.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: Planes: Fire & Rescue
Without purpose life would be a continuous cycle of sleeping, eating, working and repeating it all over day after day. This procedure becomes automatic with the absence of thought, similar to being a robot. There is a price one pays when they fall into this mode. The synapses of their brain curl and wither like gnarled arthritic hands, losing movement as they become frozen in one pointless position. Purpose is what adds new colorful landscaped roads to the continual construction site of the mind. These roads can lead one to uncharted territories that spark and reveal a new concept or idea that adds fuel to one’s journey in life. One of the reasons why I decided to become a fitness instructor was due to how I was treated in phys ed classes. Not being athletically inclined, I yearned for a gym class where everyone would be treated equally; no one would be made to feel inadequate or be the butt of cruel jokes. I had a good pitching arm back then but no one looked beyond my physical girth. From that time I found a purpose that put me on my life’s path and continues to bring me unlimited joy as a fitness and yoga instructor. THIS animated adventure film offered a similar message. Dane Cook (Mr. Brooks, Dan in Real Life) voiced the character Dusty Crophopper, a world class champion racer. Discovering he had an engine problem that could end his racing career, Dusty decided to join the aerial firefighter squadron led by Blade Ranger, voiced by Ed Harris (A Beautiful Mind, The Abyss). The major challenge facing Dusty would be to see if his engine could withstand the extensive training required for the job. Visually, this movie was fun to watch with its sense of depth and variety of airplane models, but there was nothing I would consider groundbreaking. The majority of actors voicing the characters were fine in their roles, There were really no standouts except for Fred Willard (Ira & Abby, Anchorman franchise) as the Secretary of the Interior. Though this picture was listed as a comedy, the humor would only appease young children. I found the puns old and corny, not able to recall uttering a single chuckle. The biggest issue I had with this film was its lack of creativity. It was so formulaic and stereotypical that my overall feeling towards this movie was one of tiredness. I think this could have easily been released straight to DVD, there was a blandness to the whole thing. It was such a shame, because the message it was trying to convey was certainly a positive one that shined a light on a noble profession.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: A Long Way Down
No one has the right to tell you how you should feel is one of my strongest mantras. Among all the individuals within the circles of connections in my life, everyone knows there is no reason to cover-up, modify or hide one’s feelings. If someone is in a foul mood, so be it. I am not one to offer platitudes like “things will get better” or “it will be a brighter day soon.” When I am sad or depressed I certainly do not want someone around trying to cheer me up. I just want someone to be accepting and understand this is how I am feeling right at the moment. The phrase “misery loves company” comes to mind and there is some truth in it. I have noticed a stronger connection forms between 2 people when they are commiserating about similar circumstances. It is true for me when my friends and I are at a concert or on a trip, shared excitement only accentuates the experience. The same holds true during a somber or sad experience. It all comes down to the ability to relate to another being, to know there is someone else who is feeling the same way as you. COINCIDENTALLY, the four individuals in this comedic drama accidentally discovered they were each feeling the same way with the same idea. It was New Year’s Eve and expecting to be alone Martin, Maureen, Jess and JJ; played by Pierce Brosnan (Love is All You Need, The Ghost), Toni Collette (The Way Way Back, Little Miss Sunshine), Imogen Poots (Jane Eyre, That Awkward Moment) and Aaron Paul (Need for Speed, Breaking Bad-TV); all found themselves on the top of a high-rise building at the same time with plans to jump off the roof. Instead of ending their lives that night, they form an unusual pact to help support each other through their troubled times. Based on the novel by Nick Hornby (High Fidelity, About a Boy), believe it or not this film offered a few amusing moments. The subject may be morbid for some; but I found the script did a decent job of handling the subject matter, mixing doses of lightheartedness with darkness. Though the acting was this movie’s strongest feature, it could not help save this dramedy. I found the story jumped around too much, never allowing time to offer further explanation to the scenes. With things coming across piecemeal, the story never fully developed and fell flat. Not that I expect you to agree with me on every one of my movie reviews, but I feel comfortable there will be many who will feel the same way I do after they see this film.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Secondhand Lions
They say a picture paints 1,000 words and for the most part it can. However, there are some pictures/photographs that I feel would be a perfect accompaniment to an oral history. Family photos are one example that comes to mind. Whether they are from my family or friends, I have always been curious to hear the stories associated with the pictures. Some of those old sepia toned photos pasted onto hard cardboard, where the people are staring straight ahead with stern faces, can provide some interesting tales. Among my photographs I have sat and wondered what future generations would think about them. There is the photo of a dog’s head lying on a pillow with a blanket pulled up to his chin. They have no idea that in the middle of the night when I would get up to use the bathroom, our dog would jump up onto the bed into my spot and pull the covers up over himself. I would come back to bed and see him looking at me as if he were asking me, “What do you want?” That dog was such a character. BECAUSE I feel family stories are important and need to be shared; I thoroughly enjoyed what was being said in this film festival nominated movie. Taking place in Texas, Haley Joel Osment (The Sixth Sense, Pay it Forward) played Walter, a young boy whose mother Mae, played by Kyra Sedgwick (Gamer, The Closer-TV), planned to drop him off with his eccentric uncles so she could go to school out of state. Uncle Garth and Uncle Hub, played by Michael Caine (Children of Men, Sleuth) and Robert Duvall (The Godfather franchise, Crazy Heart) were 2 of the most unusual men, who told strange stories, Walter had ever seen in his life. This comedic drama had such a pleasant way of letting the stories unfold from scene to scene. There was a sense of homeyness and familiarity that many viewers could identify to their own families. Though some of the roles verged on being cartoon like, I thought the cast’s acting was incredibly good. Michael and Robert were perfect, giving even doses of abruptness and quiet sweetness out of their characters. With the story set in the 1960s, this family film had a different pace and simpleness where some individuals might have a hard time relating to it. I, on the other hand, found such a feeling of comfort and deepening between the characters in this picture that it made me yearn for those family get togethers where the older relatives would share their family histories with the younger generations.
2 2/3 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Begin Again
There are people who come into our lives to provide us with the glasses of confidence for us to see our true abilities. It can happen to any of us where the important things close to us cannot be seen. This movie review site is the perfect example. I had been content emailing friends and family my latest feelings about the movies I had seen. A few friends mentioned setting up a site where I would only need to type up one review of a movie and the site would forward it to those who signed up. One friend in particular was the catalyst for me to pull myself away from the fear of uncertainty and venture into the vulnerable world of the internet. He was a former talk show host out east, who was a gifted cook. His latest project was to create a blog where he could teach viewers how to cook. He had such an enthusiasm that was infectious regarding his blog that it spilled over onto me. With his encouragement and incredible positive attitude, I began the mental process of creating Moviejoltz. There are so many examples around us of individuals who have the ability to illuminate our seeds of hope; I could go on and on. INSTEAD I suggest you watch what took place in this comedic drama. Mark Ruffalo (The Avengers, Now You See Me) played Dan, a down on his luck music executive. Spiraling down into a world of alcoholism, one night Dan heard a voice in a nightclub that would change his life and the life of the singer/songwriter Greta, played by Keira Knightley (Anna Karenina, Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit). Written and directed by John Carney (Once, The Rafters) this musical movie had a certain charm and sweetness to it, even if it was somewhat predictable. The best part was the acting. Besides Mark and Keira, Hailee Steinfeld (True Grit, Ender’s Game) as Dan’s daughter Violet and musician Adam Levine (American Horror Story-TV) as Greta’s boyfriend Dave were excellent with their characters. I will admit there was a part of me that felt the director was trying to recapture the magic of his movie Once, however having the story set in New York City along with the gifted cast, I found myself being entertained by the story. An additional surprise was seeing Keira carrying a tune which only added to my enjoyment of the soundtrack. Being a firm believer that we each are handed a gift from everyone we meet, I found the way the characters connected in this film to be life affirming.
3 stars
moviejoltz 