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Flash Movie Review: R.I.P.D.
It is not healthy for me to ignore my cravings. If it involves a particular food, I know if I do not satisfy my yearning, I will only wind up eating other things that will not be gratifying to me. What would make the situation worse is if I could not find the right item; I am sure this has happened to many of you. That urge, let us say, for a chocolate chip cookie; where your mind races to figure out the fastest way you can get one of those decadent, lovely circular mounds of soft moist dough that have accepted the requests from those deep rich chocolate chips to come settle down and plant roots on their pliable land–aahhhh. Imagine how it feels when you finally find a place that sells these cookies, buy one and on your first bite your taste buds are assaulted by a dry, unsweetened, hard pice of crumbling sawdust. You were taken in by a horrible imposter. Well, that is the same feeling I had watching this poor excuse for a science fiction/fantasy film. Recently slain police officer Nick, played by Ryan Reynolds (Safe House, Just Friends) found himself sitting in front of Proctor, played by Mary-Louise Parker (Red franchise, Solitary Man), the Unhuman Resources Manager for the Rest In Peace Department. Being given the option to go back to Earth, Nick agreed to join the force so he could find his killer. Accompanying him was veteran officer Roy, played by Jeff Bridges (True Grit, Crazy Heart). The story was a cut and paste job that took parts from Men in Black, Ghost and Ghost Busters. Unfortunately the writers did nothing to enhance or update the stories; so, I am at a loss to understand why they bothered with this movie. There was such a great opportunity to inject humor into this film; if only the writers had played up the human forms of NIck and Roy. Those alive would see Roy as a young, voluptuous blonde-haired woman and Nick as an elderly Asian man. It would have been funny to see more of these two characters in the crazy stunts that happened to them. The special effects were fine and I was so surprised to see Kevin Bacon (Mystic River, Sleepers) in the movie as Hayes. He was not in any of the trailers I had seen. Maybe the whole purpose of the film was so Jeff and Ryan could be added into the trail of seven degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon. After sitting through this film I came home and popped a DVD in of a good science fiction movie to watch and satisfy my craving.
1 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The To Do List
It felt as if I was receiving the winning lottery ticket when I was handed my high school diploma. I saw it as my opportunity to become someone different. You see, I was tired of being a punching bag and a punch line in high school. One of the reasons why I chose the particular university I attended was, as far as I knew, no one from my high school had applied there. The summer prior to attending the fall semester, I let my hair grow out to its natural curly state, began an exercise and diet program and most importantly, found student housing off campus. My studio apartment was on a floor that had mostly graduate students. Being the youngest and newest on the floor, the older students not only helped me navigate my way through the university system, but looked out for me. It was a whole different world for me, where I was finally able to be myself and not be judged. Having always felt that peer pressure was a highly infectious disease; I immediately understood where valedictorian Brandy Klark, played by Aubrey Plaza (Safety Not Guaranteed, Damsels in Distress) was coming from in this story. Determined not to still be a virgin by the time she started college, Brandy made a to do list of all the activities she felt she needed to achieve her goal. This comedy was filled with a multitude of strong, crude, graphic language and scenes. I did not have an issue with it, understanding the attraction to this film was having the story being told from a woman’s point of view. To verify my reactions, I imagined scenes where the female characters were male and came to the same conclusion: I did not find this movie funny. There were pockets of humor here and there, but overall I felt the movie was on overkill. Brandy’s relationship to her older sister Amber, played by Rachel Bilson (Jumper, Hart of Dixie-TV), was similar to other sister relationships done before. I felt more humor could have been mined from Brandy’s parents Judge and Mrs. Klark, played by Clark Gregg (The Avengers, 500 Days of Summer) and Connie Britton (Conception, Friday Night Lights-TV). As for Bill Hader (Superbad, Saturday Night Live-TV) playing pool manager Willy, his character was no different then the characters he did before on television. I did find the crisp pacing led to tight, steady scenes. If only the to do list in making this movie had been double checked.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Girl Most Likely
Once one gets past the awkwardness of puberty and the teen years, is there any reason to be embarrassed for something you had no control over? I am not talking about your hair accidentally being dyed a color not found in nature or tripping over a crack in the sidewalk. Instead I am referring to things like your birthplace, parents or current residence. I find it perplexing when someone is embarrassed to have visitors over to their perceived small, or some other negative adjective, apartment, because the guests live in a swanky or trendy place. Another example would be being ashamed of a parent’s lack of education. Maybe some of these comparisons could be considered a form of envy which I find distasteful. I had the same type of feeling for this comedy film. Kristen Wiig (Bridesmaids, Saturday Night Live-TV) played aspiring playwright Imogene. Struggling to become successful in New York City, she found herself in a predicament that required her to move back in with her mother Zelda, played by Annette Bening (Ruby Sparks, Running With Scissors). Things would not be the same due to two strangers Lee and George, played by Darren Criss (Glee-TV) and Matt Dillon (Crash, Wild Things), living in her mother’s house now. I have to tell you right from the start; this movie was not a comedy, it was a tragedy. This is not a compliment. To create a balance of drama and comedy, it takes work with a little finesse. The story was atrocious; none of the characters were likable. For the duration of this film I found maybe two or three things that were slightly amusing. One of them had Darren Criss’s character singing. Outside of that I have to say this film was icky. In an instance such as this; it would be totally understandable if the actors were embarrassed about their finished product, I know I was for them.
1 1/2 stars
Flash Movie Review: Red 2
There is an easy camaraderie created when a group of people have a singular purpose. Whether one is an employee, volunteer or teammate; when personalities blend together a relationship is formed of shared experiences. When I have done volunteer work I notice there tends to be a quick connection made between all the volunteers. The same happens when new fitness instructors come on board at the health clubs, where I teach. An added benefit to these types of connections is the ability to have fun. Yes, even at one’s place of employment there can be times of fun when everyone is supportive of their fellow employees. Well okay, let us say at least bearable. This sense of fun is what I appreciated most about this action comedy. It was obvious the actors were enjoying both their roles and each other in this sequel. Joining Bruce Willis (Looper, Moonrise Kingdom) as Frank, John Malkovich (Burn After Reading, Dangerous Liaisons) as Marvin, Helen Mirren (The Debt, Hitchcock) as Victoria and Mary-Louise Parker (R.I.P.D., Weeds-TV) as Sarah were Catherine Zeta-Jones (Chicago, The Terminal) as Russian agent Katja and Anthony Hopkins (Thor, Hitchcock) as mad scientist Bailey. The story was far-fetched about Frank and the team trying to retrieve a megaton explosive device that was smuggled into Moscow during the cold war. Being a fan of Helen, I got a kick out of her role being more physical this time. The script was uneven where some lines were humorous while others fell flat. Bruce has been doing the same type of character for so long, he tended to be a bit cartoonish for me. In the case of John; since I have seen him perform live on stage and know what he is capable of doing, I thought he was excellent in his role. Anthony was exceptionally good with his character. This was not the type of movie where one needed to think much; there was nothing deep about it. Honestly, I think the success of the first movie gave these actors the opportunity to hang out again and share some good times, while filming took place all over the world.
2 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Grown Ups 2
Someone, please hand me a breath mint because I still have a bad taste in my mouth from this wretched film. Usually a sequel will show some kind of growth for its characters, but not this one. Coincidently, I recently attended my high school reunion. Visiting with former classmates was real special. We shared memories and laughed at some of the crazy things we did while attending school. The thing that separated us from the characters in this movie is we grew up. The closest I found to a story line in this celluloid catastrophe was Lenny Feder, played by Adam Sandler (The Waterboy, Happy Gilmore), moved his family back to his hometown, where he grew up with his old friends Eric, Kurt and Marcus; played by Kevin James (Here Comes the Boom, Paul Blart: Mall Cop), Chris Rock (Head of State, Down to Earth) and David Spade (The Benchwarmers, Tommy Boy). The lack of a story made for a dull series of infantile jokes and gags; some that had no relevance to what the characters were doing. In fact, I found some of the jokes offensive. With Adam being credited as one of the writers, all I can tell you is the writing was lazy. It seemed as if the characters were thrown into the story just to give Adam’s friends a job. What I did not understand is why someone like Steve Buscemi (Rampart, Boardwalk Empire-TV) would agree to do a cameo as Wiley. I thought he was successful and making decent money. As for some of the other actors in cameo appearances, it was obvious they needed a paycheck. There was nothing I found redeeming about this film. I did not find anything funny about people with flatulence or indigestion. There are two reasons why I gave an extra 1/4 star to my rating of this so called comedy. The first has to do with the cast. Without naming names, this film is doing taxpayers a favor because it included several actors who would otherwise be collecting unemployment benefits. The second reason is for the complete shock I had that Rob Schneider (The Hot Chick, Deuce Bigalow franchise) was not part of the cast.
1 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Kevin Hart: Let Me Explain
There is an electrified energy felt when sitting with a group of like minded people who share a common interest. The size of the venue does not matter because everyone has the same purpose for coming together–to experience their favorite comedian or musician in the flesh. I sometimes can get that feeling in a movie theater, but it is only if everyone is into the movie. Live music or comedy acts are different because they start out by drawing people who enjoy that type of music or brand of comedy. There is nothing quite like the feeling of sharing laughter with a multitude of people. The laughter feeds on itself, carrying some people to a total release. Music concerts do the same thing; but instead of laughing, people can be transported to a world of magical musical notes and blooming colors floating in the air. Unfortunately not everyone can experience such things due to financial circumstances. For that reason I believe filmed concerts are a valid way for people to experience their favorite artists. With that being said; in reviewing this film I only knew Kevin Hart (Think Like a Man, The Five-Year Engagement) as an actor, not a comedian. I have never seen his act or comedy specials on television; so, I feel I may be at a disadvantage to write about this concert movie filmed at Madison Square Garden. The movie was only 75 minutes long, with the first 15 of it being a weak lead in to the concert. As for the concert I was surprised Kevin’s shows were sold out for such a large arena. So evidently there are people who like his humor. His stories and jokes focused on a more personal level; talking about his kids, divorce and relationships. I found them amusing but not really funny. The use of strong language got old for me; I feel comedians use profanity just for the shock value. There is not much more I can say about this comedy film except the patrons around me were all laughing loudly. If you like Kevin’s style of humor you will like the movie. On the other hand, you may want to see it anyway because a movie ticket is a whole lot cheaper to buy than a concert ticket. Strong language used throughout the movie.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: I’m So Excited
There is a sort of beauty and curse that I consider airplanes flying elevators. The doors open, you walk in, the doors close and when they open the next time, you are in a different place. I enjoy that aspect of flying. Being confined in a small space with strangers is the part I do not like. Because I am always having to talk both at the office and in my classes, when I get on a plane I want to zone out and relax. Small talk is not something that comes easy to me. I have been known to pretend I do not understand English, to avoid conversations with the people sitting near me. All of that would change if I was stuck on a flight like the one in this comedy. When a plane had a mechanical failure with its landing gear, the passengers and crew were stuck circling their destination until a solution could be found. Left to their own devices; the crew did whatever they could to get through the crisis, as the passengers’ anxiety continued to rise. From the imaginative writer and director Pedro Almodovar (The Skin I Live In, Bad Education) this was lighter fare compared to his other recent films. Javier Camara (Talk to Her, Bad Education), Carlos Areces (The Last Circus, Game of Werewolves) and Raul Arevalo (Even The Rain, Dark Blue Almost Black) played the outrageous flight attendants Joserra, Fajas and Ulloa. The dialog came fast and sharp as each character’s story played out. I found some scenes amusing; others a bit witty, but none that were worthy of a belly laugh. Out of several scenes that had a sexual nature, there was one in particular where I wondered if it would have caused controversy if the roles of the female and male passengers were switched. If the movie was meant to be a satire or have some political agenda it was lost on me. I found the film to be light fluff overall. However, it did make me think flights could be fun if the airlines starting booking entertainment acts on them. Spanish with English subtitles.
2 1/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Unfinished Song
There are times when it is better to be the patient than the doctor. When you see the one you love in discomfort or pain from an illness, it can break one’s heart. I was in a long term relationship where at one point they were sick for 2 consecutive months. The doctors could not find the cause of the sickness; my heart would crack a little further each time I looked into their eyes. Gratefully, things turned out fine; but I know how hard it could have been if it was something that turned fatal. Everyone handles sickness and death differently. The beauty of this touching film festival winner was watching Vanessa Redgrave (Letters to Juliet, Coriolanus) and Terrence Stamp (Wanted, Yes Man) play long time married couple Marion and Arthur Harris. In a previous review I talked about the attraction of opposites. This couple perfectly showed how two strikingly different individuals built a loving and supportive life together. Marian was the bubbly, outgoing joyful one; while Arthur was the dark, brooding sourpuss. The story showed how two people handled the intrusion of illness into their lives. Though there were no surprises with the story; the acting from Vanessa and Terrence was something to behold. More drama than comedy, I was surprised with the turn of events in this musical movie. Regarding Gemma Arterton (Hansel & Gretal: Witch Hunters, Quantum of Solace), this was a different type of role for her as she played choir director Elizabeth. I actually found her character to be undeveloped; there was not enough information to understand what motivated her. A puzzling side note has to do with the audience sitting around me. I was the youngest person in the theater; the majority of patrons were senior citizens, several being assisted by walkers. I have no explanation for it. The story may not have been special, but watching Marion and Arthur brought tears to my eyes. To have someone special in your life is truly a gift; I just wish it could last forever.
2 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Way, Way Back
My tongue instinctively brushed the surface of my teeth looking for my braces that were made from the shiniest metal on the planet. I had to check my face to see if any angry pimples were about to burst out from under my skin. Then there was the vision of me seeing the first wave of facial hair spreading across my face like a brewing storm, warning me of the impending turmoil of adolescence that was coming over me. All of those awkward and confused moments swirled up from my pooled memories while I sat and watched this wonderful, coming of age film. Liam James (Fred Claus, 2012) was perfect playing the 14 year old character Duncan. A simple look from him easily conveyed those embarrassing emotions we all felt at one time or another during our adolescent years. Duncan was stuck going with his mother Pam, played by Toni Collette (Little Miss Sunshine, United States of Tara-TV) and her overbearing boyfriend Trent, played by Steve Carell (Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, Get Smart) to Trent’s summer home during summer vacation. Uncomfortable with his surroundings, Duncan found refuge at a run down water park managed by the kid like Owen, played by Sam Rockwell (Moon, Seven Psychopaths) and his wife Caitlin, played by Maya Rudolph (Grown Ups, Bridesmaids). This was one of the best performances I have seen from Sam; his character was crazy and memorable. I loved the unexpectedness of this poignant film. Everyone’s acting was so strong and realistic; Allison Janney (Juno, Liberal Arts) was hilarious as Trent’s alcoholic neighbor Betty. The script offered up such ideal lines, I actually felt a bond forming between me and several of the characters. After experiencing many memories from my youth during this film, a shadow of my adolescence remained behind as I walked out of the theater.
3 1 /3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Despicable Me 2
The magic of cartoons is their ability to turn something real into the unreal. They can take a current topic and provide a different spin on it or turn it into a satire. Cartoon characters can be beaten and hurt multiple times, yet still come back for more, while providing us with a good laugh. And then there is the use of color and design; everyday items can suddenly defy gravity and physics in their twisted, illogical shapes and hues. I was raised on the classic Looney Tunes cartoons from Warner Bros. The foundation to any cartoon is a solid story and Looney Tunes was brilliant in their ability to play with a story. In this animated sequel I felt the story was disappointingly weak. Steve Carell (Hope Springs, Date Night) was back again, this time as Gru the family man to the three orphaned girls. Gone was Gru’s nastiness, though I thought Steve still did an excellent job voicing the character. New to the cast was Kristen Wiig (Bridesmaids, Friends with Kids) as agent Lucy and Benjamin Bratt (Miss Congeniality, Catwoman) as club owner Edwardo. The story this time had Gru being recruited by the Anti-Villain League to track down a new super criminal. On the plus side the Minions were back and offered some fun gags. However, the issue I had with this movie concerned the lazy writing. I mean come on, did we really need to try and mine humor out of flatulence? It was just an easy way to piece the story together. Where some of this year’s recent animated movies entertained both children and adults; I think younger kids would like this comedy more than adults. Another issue I had with the movie was its predictability. Cartoons should be able to offer at least a surprise or two for the viewer; I did not find anything close to being shocking. Instead of creating magic with Gru and the girls, it seemed the studio was looking to make a quick buck; some magic act.
2 1/2 stars
