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Flash Movie Review: They/Them

I WOULD LIKE YOU TO READ the following comments and tell me what they all have in common: “You would look better if you cut your hair.” “If you would lose some weight, you would look nicer.” “Why don’t you go into accounting; you are so good with numbers?” “I think you should play football; it will do you good.” Now that you have read them, what do you think is the answer? If you said, all the statements were offering unsolicited advice you would be correct. If you also said the statements were seeking to make a change in the individual, that would be a correct answer as well. For me, there is a difference between offering advice when asked compared to telling a person what you think they should do. No one has the right to try and change a person except for a psychiatrist and that is only if the person is seeking the means for a change in their life. One of the things I believe in is every person was put on this planet to experience or be happy. If they are not happy, then they need to find the means to experience happiness for themselves, whatever happiness means to them. When I first started to lose weight, I was doing it because I was not happy with my size. Clothes never fit correctly, were hard to find in my size and I tired quickly which made me unhappy. Despite the name calling and hearing the comments from “good intentioned” people; my weight loss only happened when I decided I wanted to make a change.      I HAD A FRIEND IN SCHOOL who was the butt of jokes and nasty comments because he was perceived as different by several students. He was super smart, with interests that were different from the other students. Having no interest in sports, besides not being athletically inclined, he was fascinated with art and fashion. It was never a surprise for me to see him walking down the hallway in clothing one would find in a fashion magazine. Where I preferred plain home style cooking, he always wanted to try some exotic, foreign food. Despite the ridicule and taunting he received, he did not change what he did. I admired his determination not to change himself just so he could fit in. He would tell me if the bullies cannot appreciate his passion, then it is their issue not his. I thought of him and others who would not change themselves because someone wanted them to be different, as I watched this mystery, horror thriller.      THE METHODS AND TECHNIQUES BEING USED at an LGBTQ+ conversion camp was becoming increasingly more uncomfortable for a group of teenage campers. And that was taking place before a dead body showed up. With Kevin Bacon (The Woodsman, My One and Only) as Owen, Theo Germaine (Work in Progress-TV, The Politician-TV) as Jordan, Anna Chlumsky (My Girl franchise, Veep-TV) as Molly, Carrie Preston (The Good Wife-TV, True Blood-TV) as Cora and Quei Tann (Dear White People-TV, Bruh-TV) as Alexandra; the idea behind this story intrigued me enough to decide to watch it. The cast was good, and the entire flavor of this film felt like a flashback to the stalker movies from the 70’s and 80’s. Unfortunately, the script was a poor patchwork of what felt like “woke” marketing topics. I was bored through parts of this picture; it lacked the suspense and horror one needs to make a story intense. At times, it felt like there were two story lines that could have gone their separate ways in their own movie. Credit must be given to the producers for approving this story to film; however, I do not feel the writing did it any justice. Characters were stereotypical and the scenes were predictable most of the time. Now, I am not telling the writers to make changes; however, maybe another rewrite would have helped this film. There were several scenes with blood and violence.   

1 ½ stars  

Flash Movie Review: Morbius

I HAVE BEEN TOLD I HAVE a suspicious nature and to tell you the truth, I do not totally disagree with it. When I meet someone for the first time, I am polite and cordial as we exchange questions and comments; however, there is a part of me that is assessing the person, both in what they say and their mannerisms. I remember a company I worked for where on my first day, this employee came up and introduced himself to me. He asked me some benign questions at first, but then there seemed to be a couple of questions thrown in that were a little more personal. I answered them despite being wary of his purpose for such questions. As the weeks went by, we wound up having a decent work relationship. However, I still had my radar out trying to figure him out. I was always careful to maintain a professional attitude while settling into my place within the company. It was not too long before I started seeing some of this employee’s actions in an unfavorable light. He would leave early some days, others come in late; it seemed as if he was creating his own schedule. There were even some days where he just did not show up. For the fact he was in upper management, I did not question his actions; I just was getting a bad feeling about his motives. As it turned out, he was transitioning to a competitor and taking trade secrets with him. I was right to keep my distance because those employees who were closer to him had to be interviewed by upper management which led to this employee being terminated.      MY RADAR HAS SERVED ME WELL in life. A friend of mine was dating a man I did not trust. There was something about him that set off my radar. Maybe it was the way he bragged about his personal possessions or his inflated ego; I just knew something was off about him. All of us would get together for dinner or a movie and each time around him my guard was up. Because I had such a close relationship with my friend, I shared my concerns with her; not in a confrontational way but expressing how I felt around him. She appreciated it but I do not know if it made a difference in how she felt about this guy. As it turned out several months later, he asked to borrow some money from her. Once she was satisfied with the answers she got to her questions, she lent him the funds. I was surprised but could not say anything, nor did I have to because she never heard from him again. There are some people you get a vibe from that you cannot trust them. This is how I felt about the main character in this action horror movie.      AFTER EXPERIMENTING ON HIMSELF with a new treatment for his disease, a biochemist develops a side effect that could be lethal, but to who? With Jared Leto (House of Gucci, Suicide Squad) as Dr. Michael Morbius, Matt Smith (Last Night in Soho, The Forgiven) as Milo, Adria Arjona (Life of the Party, Pacific Rim: Uprising) as Martine Bancroft, Jared Harris (Poltergeist, The Crown-TV) as Dr. Emil Nicholas and Tyrese Gibson (Fast & Furious franchise, Black and Blue) as Agent Simon Stroud; this adventure movie was a confusing mess to me. I could not tell if the character Morbius was a good or bad character, which led me to a level of boredom. The special effects were poorly done, and the fight scenes were hyper fast with intermittent slow-motion movement, in other words not appealing or exciting. Any attempts at humor fell flat in the poorly constructed script. Throughout the picture, I never made a connection to any of the characters. Maybe it was due to the acting which was only adequate; but I was bored through most of the film. Sadly, the movie studio must be hoping for a sequel because there were 2 extra scenes during the credits.      

1 ½ stars 

Flash Movie Review: Annette

THERE IS A FINE LINE BETWEEN the feelings of annoyance and hatred. I cannot say it is a rock-solid line in my world. My grocery store stopped carrying my brand of bagged spinach, so they could sell their in-house store brand. I was annoyed but bought their bag anyway. Honestly, I cannot tell the difference except their brand has more loose stems in the bag than my brand. Well now for the past 3 weeks, I open the bag and find partially decomposed pieces. I double checked but knew the bag’s expiration date had not passed. The first time this happened, I was annoyed. The same the 2nd time it happened. But now, I hate their bagged spinach and plan on going to a different grocery store just to get bagged spinach that doesn’t look like slime after you open the bag for the first time. Currently, I am getting annoyed with this store’s fresh broccoli. I do not know what is happening but the last couple of times I have brought it home and washed it, within a couple of days the florets turn dark and mushy. I have been buying broccoli for years and have never had an issue up until now. If this keeps up, I will stop buying the store’s broccoli as well. I am telling you, if they keep annoying me with food that quickly goes bad, I may decide the heck with them and buy all my groceries from a different store.      SO MANY PEOPLE ARE QUICK TO JUDGE something or someone and decide they do not like it. I am guilty of this when it especially comes to food. If it doesn’t look good to me, I will not eat it. I am a texture eater; if a food dish looks like it is gelatinous, I cannot stomach even looking at it. Have you ever had food in a sauce that you saved for the next day and the sauce turned into something like an aspic? It has happened to me with some Asian dishes. It is more than an annoyance for me when I open the storage container and see pieces of food suspended in a murky jelly like substance. Do I actually hate it? I know I hate when it happens but maybe I can say I do not like the look of it, though my feelings are close to hating the stuff. Hate is a word I try not to randomly throw around on what essentially are innocuous things. I do not hate public transportation, but I hate running for a bus or train that pulls away as I am getting up to it. For the first time this year, I experienced the strongest feelings that bordered on hatred for a movie.      A COMEDIAN’S AND OPERA SINGER’S RELATIONSHIP is all being viewed in the public’s eye. As the two get more serious, so does the pressure. With Adam Driver (Marriage Story, The Report) as Henry McHenry, Marion Cotilard (Angel Face, The Immigrant) as Ann Defrasnoux, Simon Helberg (Florence Foster Jenkins, Old School) as The Accompanist, relative newcomer Devyn McDowell as Annette in prison and Natalia Lafourcade (Amar no es querer, El cielo en tu mirada) as Special Guest/The Police; this dramatic musical romance tested my limits on keeping me engaged. Visually I did not mind the scenes; however, I thought almost every musical number was awful. Listening to Adam sing through the film was rough. Maybe there is some secret symbolism in the story; but with my focus being on the entertainment factor, I thought the script was a poor piece of a story that has been told time and time again. The irony here is I liked the acting; but there was nothing in this picture that I found enjoyable. To me, it was pretentious as it attempted to be “artsy.” And at 2 hours and 21 minutes, it was a long and painful waste of time.

1 ½ stars 

Flash Movie Review: The New Mutants

IT HAS BEEN A LITTLE OVER one year when we first heard about this new virus spreading around the world. Everywhere I looked there was news about people getting sick and being hospitalized due to this unknown virus. Without the knowledge, all these recommendations were coming out on how to protect oneself: such as avoid touching the face, eyes, mouth, physical human contact and common surfaces. Up until this point, I was going to the movie theaters on a weekly basis. With all this information and warnings coming out, I started questioning whether it was safe to continue going to the movie theaters. Less and less people were there each week. Since it was the tail end of winter, I felt I could stay safe wearing a mask and my winter gloves. It certainly was weird to walk into a theater and see no one at the concession stands. The self-serve beverage machines all had big yellow X’s taped across them and there were no employees behind the candy counter. My ticket was on my phone; so, when I got near the ticket taker, I extended my arm out all the way to avoid getting any closer to him. Funny, he did the same thing with his barcode reader pointed towards me.      I WAS THE ONLY PERSON WHEN I walked into the movie auditorium. Not sure what to expect, I picked a seat on the aisle all the way back; so, I could avoid having people walking past me. It turned out, I did not have to worry because only 2 other people showed up, taking seats at the bottom row on the opposite side of the theater. I thought about removing my mask but decided to play it safe by keeping it on. There were ceiling fans slowing turning above, but I had no idea what the air quality was like in the theater. In an odd sort of way, I enjoyed having few people sitting in the theater with me. I did not have to be annoyed with the talking, texting and milling about of people that I typically experienced in the past. For two weeks I continued my schedule of going to the theater, despite the COVID news becoming more ominous. There was talk that our governor was going to order our state to be shut down. I wondered what I would do without a first run movie to review, from the theater. The last week before the shutdown was ordered, this film came out at the theaters. I debated with myself if it was a good idea to go since the news was getting worse; I decided to take a pass on this action, science fiction mystery and stayed home. It was a good call.     FINDING THEMSELVES IN A MEDICAL FACILITY, five young adults were the test subjects in a study to determine what was their special powers. The doctor running the study said it was to protect them, but something did not feel right about the place. With Maisie Williams (Then Came You, Game of Thrones-TV) as Rahne Sinclair, Anna Taylor-Joy (The Witch, The Queen’s Gambit-TV) as Illyana Rasputin, Charlie Heaton (Shut In, Stranger Things-TV) as Sam Guthrie, Alice Braga (Portrait of a Thief, Elysium) as Dr. Reyes and Blu Hunt (Another Life-TV, The Originals-TV) as Moonstar; this film festival nominee was the movie studio’s attempt to create an origin story about the X-Men.  This movie dragged on for a good portion of the time. Though I enjoyed seeing Maisie and Anna in a different type of role, the script was poorly written. I thought the few special effects were meager. In fact, there was blandness to this picture, both visually and mentally. I am glad I did not pay to see this, and have it become the last movie I saw in a theater before our lockdown.

1 ½ stars   

Flash Movie Review: Thunder Force

FRIENDSHIPS FORM ON THE COMMONALITIES SHARED between two people. I also feel included in the formation is the admiration one has for an attribute they see in the other person; an attribute that the person realizes they themselves lack. One of my oldest friends, who I met in elementary school, had a peaceful and soothing way of talking that attracted me immediately. I felt I was opposite because I tended to take things to the max, always quick to respond with full force whether the situation warranted it or not. There was another friendship that formed around the same time and it was their easy-going ways that intrigued me. Where I had to sit and ponder things, they were quick to respond with a “yes” or “sure” or “okay” to pretty much any request. That was so foreign that their behavior fascinated me and from there we became lifelong friends. So, you see this is why I think it not only takes things in common that connects two people, but the differences between them. I know a couple who on the surface look like they have nothing in common, they appear to be so opposite in their ways. Yet, if you spend quality time with them you would see how each one admires the differences because it allows the to see things through the other person’s eyes.      LIFE AT TIMES WILL CREATE THESE long periods of separation between friends. There was not any type of rift or disagreement that caused it, it simply happened based on changing responsibilities and priorities. I have a friend who lives out of state; our contact is infrequent, where months could go by before we communicate with one another. Yet, when we finally get to talk to each other, there seems to be no break in our connection. We can pick up right where we left off from the previous time. Sure, some of our beliefs have evolved into different paths but at the core we remain close to each other. The key to maintaining a friendship like this or any friendship for that matter is to avoid making any judgements. I used to have a friend who constantly judged me and was always telling me what I “should” do. The final nail that split us apart was when I introduced them to the person I was dating and within 5 minutes they were treating my date rudely. I decided right then and there we had too many differences and not enough commonality to keep our friendship going. If you want to see the evolution of a friendship, you can see it play out in this action, adventure comedy.      A CLASS REUNION WAS THE IMPETUS that pushed Lydia Berman, played by Melissa McCarthy (The Kitchen, Can You Ever Forgive Me?), to reach out to a childhood friend she had not been in contact with for many years. After so many years being apart, Lydia was not sure what she would say to her friend. With Octavia Spencer (The Witches, Ma) as Emily Stanton, Jason Bateman (Bad Words, Game Night) as The Crab, Bobby Cannavale (The Irishman, Blue Jasmine) as The King and Melissa Leo (Burn Country, Prisoners) as Allie; this film festival nominee had a major flaw, Melissa’s husband as the writer and director. The script was beyond predictable and filled with lazy jokes and poor dialog. It really was annoying to have two gifted actors, Melissa and Octavia, try and squeeze out sense to the poorly done script. Melissa McCarthy in my opinion has one of the best comedic timing abilities I have seen in an actor. Pairing her with Octavia was a great idea because they appear to be so different; I thought for sure the comedy would be flowing though this story with the two of them. Sadly, there was so little taking place in this movie, both excitement and comedy, that I was not engaged with it.                

1 ½ stars     

Flash Movie Review: Overnight Delivery

ANGER THAT WAS WHITE HOT CAME bursting out of my mouth. I had no filter set up to try and temper the words that were meant to strike hard and fast. The reservoir of anger stored in me was being tapped to intensify my reaction to the news that my trust had been broken. When I heard what they did, a wall of numbness briefly tried to take up residence around me; but that break in trust after our years together destroyed the numbness, which allowed my anger to come out with no restrictions. I could tell my words were striking with accuracy because the responses I was hearing from my statements were feeble and their posture was in the process of hunkering down. To give you an idea of how much force my anger had, imagine walking on a city street lined with commercial buildings on a frigid wintery day. As you turn the corner of the block, you get hit with such a force of icy wind that it makes you lose your footing on the snow-covered sidewalk; that is how strong my anger was coming out. I thought the two of us had a committed relationship; but evidently, I was wrong. There was nothing to stop me until I completely unleashed all the anger I had inside of me.      IT WAS SEVERAL HOURS LATER, AS I replayed all the events of the day, before I admitted I had said some hurtful and hateful things to them. I do not know about you; but when I am in the heat of anger, all my senses are focused on unleashing everything stored inside of me. I have very little awareness of sounds around me. All I feel is heat rising off my skin and my radar for sensing any presence around me goes offline. In my head, my words sounded evil to the point I started to cringe when I envisioned how they were reacting to my statements. It is such a primal reaction, this anger inside of me, that I tap into to enhance the energy inside of me to keep up with the intensity. When I finished taking inventory of all the things that I had said to them, I did not know if and how to either rectify or explain it. There was still the breaking of trust and the feelings of hurt and betrayal I was experiencing; I could not come up with a plan that would achieve positive results like the main character was hoping for in this romantic comedy.      AFTER SENDING OUT A HATEFUL PACKAGE TO his girlfriend who he thought was cheating on him, the regret he was experiencing forced Wyatt Trips, played by Paul Rudd (Ant-Man franchise, Role Models), to find a way he could intercept the package before it reached its destination. He would have to outsmart the delivery driver somehow. With Christine Taylor (The Craft, The Wedding Singer) as Kimberly Jasney, Reese Witherspoon (Home Again, Water for Elephants) as Ivy Miller, Sarah Silverman (Battle of the Sexes, The Book of Henry) as Turran and Richard Cody (Ivory Tower, Smiling Fish & Goat on Fire) as Raditch; this film was lucky to have Paul and Reese as main characters. Their acting skills helped the weak script limp along to its predictable conclusion. With such a competent cast, this movie would have been better if the writers had played to the actor’s strengths, besides providing scenes that would have surprised the viewer. Instead, there were many scenes that were easy to figure out before their conclusion. The only thing I can say about this picture is it probably will not produce a strong reaction, either way, for the person who is willing to watch it all the way to the end.

1 ¾ stars    

Flash Movie Review: Congo

DESPERATE, I TOLD MY FRIEND I did not want to stick my fingers in the bowling ball. Sure, it was dumb to say; but I did not want to go by myself to the charity event. My friend was involved with the charity and they were having an event at a bowling alley, having rented out the entire place. There was going to be food, a raffle, silent auction and some other things. The morning of the event my friend woke up sick. He called to tell me and insisted I still go though now I would not know a single person at the event. Our tickets were already paid for and he wanted me to go so I could tell him all about it, since he was on the committee for the event. I tried using a variety of excuses, even offering to drive all the way there just to scope out the place then leave; but he was not having any of it. Even the offer of bringing him dinner did not work. At some point I finally resigned to the fact that I had to go; but I told him to let me know if he started to feel better later in the day and If he wanted, I could come pick him up. Unfortunately, I wound up going to the bowling alley alone.      THE DRIVE WAS UNEVENTFUL EXCEPT FOR my build up of dread. Because I am not the best in making small talk, I prefer going with someone to these events, especially when there is an activity that I must participate in. I knew I was going to have to be on a bowling team with a bunch of strangers; my anxiety was weighing heavily on me. Walking into the bowling alley I was assaulted with loud, booming music over the loudspeakers. The check-in process was easy; I got my name tag, raffle tickets and lane assignment. I went to get bowling shoes before going to my alley. The shoes I was handed looked newer gratefully than some of the shoes I saw behind the counter. As I got to my lane, I saw my teammates were already there. There was no choice but to go up to them and introduce myself. It did not go as bad as I expected; they all seemed friendly and familiar with each other. When the MC of the event came out to welcome everyone, I was relieved for the ending of our small talk. The MC went through the list of things planned then ended by telling us to have a good time as all the lanes lit up for action. On my first throw of the ball, the wildest thing happened; I rolled a strike. My teammates yelled praises at me; I felt a slight sense of relief. It turned out for the next 4 frames I threw strikes. I could not believe it, but it was such a welcome surprise because all the players around me were being supportive and encouraging. It was crazy and only the beginning for an awesome night of fun, topped with me winning one of the raffle prizes. Here I was not looking forward to going and instead had a great time; it was such a surprise. The characters in this action, adventure mystery experienced something similar by getting surprised; but, with way different results.      AFTER HER FIANCE WENT MISSING DOCTOR Karen Ross, played by Laura Linney (You Can Count on Me, The Other Man) found an expedition that would take her to the Congo to look for him. Her travels would lead her to find something more. With Dylan Walsh (The Stepfather, The Lake House) as Dr. Peter Elliot, Ernie Hudson (Ghostbusters franchise, The Crow) as Captain Monroe Kelly, Tim Curry (The Hunt for Red October, The Rocky Horror Picture Show) as Herkermer Homolka and Grant Heslov (The Ides of March, Argo) as Richard; this film festival winner was based on the thrilling novel of the same name. Because computer graphics have gotten so much better, this movie looked so out of date. With the script jam packed with action as it tried to pour in as much from the novel as possible, the result was a cheesy mess. The highlight for me was seeing Laura Linney; she was able to command the scenes better than any of the other actors. I could see where the writers wanted to take the story, but sadly they failed. For those curious to see what special effects looked like before computer graphics, they may find this picture somewhat amusing. For the rest, they may be left groaning through most of the film.

1 ½ stars

Flash Movie Review: The Aspern Papers

WHEN I WAS A SMALL BOY, I was obsessed with pencil sharpeners. Though my obsession lasted a couple of years, I acquired a large collection of them within that time frame. I had several pencil sharpeners that were in the shape of airplanes and rocket ships; another group of them was made up of different animals. I would rotate bringing different sharpeners to school with me; as you might expect, I never had a dull pencil at my desk. There was a game I used to play with myself when sharpening a pencil. I would try to turn the pencil continuously to see if I could get one long shaving off of it. Yes, I was an intense child at times. One of my favorite pencil sharpeners was a flying saucer, the top half white and the bottom gray. The pencil hole was right in the center on the top, which allowed the pencil shavings to spin around the interior circumference of the round saucer. There was always a good chance I could get a long shaving with this pencil sharpener. At home, I would keep this sharpener in a desk drawer and whenever I needed it, I would take it out and hold it high in the air, pretending it was flying.      AS I GREW UP MY OBSESSION faded away and the pencil sharpeners were relegated to an old shoebox that resided up on a shelf in a closet. Through the years, I had other things that became my new obsession. In one of my recent reviews I talked about my thing for wristwatches; so, you see I have been visited by obsessions through my whole life. Whenever I have had conversations and talked about an obsession, I always say I prefer shaking hands with the obsession instead of trying to wrestle it. The thing I am grateful for (if there is something to be grateful about) is my obsessions never involved other people. They were always things that only had an affect on me, whether it was pencil sharpeners, wristwatches or dance music CDs. I had a friend who became obsessed with someone she met online. This altered her daily life to the point it put a strain on her friendships. She would cancel dates with friends so she could drive to finally meet this individual at a central location, only to receive a last minute text that he was called into work or some other excuse like that. Yet she would do the same thing over and over to the point some of her friends refused to make plans with her. I could see their point, but I tried to stay neutral; her obsession was preventing her from coming to terms with the reality of her situation. I could say the same thing about the main character in this dramatic movie.      WRITER AND CRITIC MORTON VINT, PLAYED by Jonathan Rhys Meyers (The 12th Man, The Tudors-TV), wanted to know everything he could about the famous poet Jeffrey Aspern, played by Jon Kortajarena (The Cliff, A Single Man). He would even pretend to be someone else if it meant getting more information about his favorite poet. With Vanessa Redgrave (Letters to Juliet, Howards End) as Juliana Bordereau, Joely Richardson (Event Horizon, Maggie) as Miss Tina and Lois Robbins (Girls Nite Out, One Life to Live-TV) as Mrs. Prest; the only reason to see this film would be to watch Vanessa and Joely working together. They were wonderful to watch as they powered their way through the weak script. I thought Jonathan’s character was not believable; he came across so odd to me that I found him uninteresting. The scenery and sets were pleasing but due to the direction and script I felt many opportunities were lost to add drama and back-story. It was sad to see Vanessa and Joely being wasted in this misfired picture. I only wished the writers would have been obsessed with telling a good story as much as Morton was obsessed with the poet Jeffrey Aspern.

 

1 ½ stars

Flash Movie Review: Harpoon

THERE IS A BLURRED BOUNDARY LINE when it comes to whether someone is being serious or simply kidding around. I had a friend who enjoyed crossing this line. He had a wicked sense of humor and was quick with the comeback. It was that humor that saved him many times from getting into a verbal fight with someone. Long ago I gave up asking him to try and tone down his remarks, explaining what he thought was funny may not translate to another person. If someone mentioned something about a new article of clothing they were wearing, he would always remark with a negative comment; something along the lines of, “Was it on the clearance rack?” or “Did you buy it to wear at a funeral?” He would then say, “only kidding” followed with complimenting them profusely which in my opinion always came across as being fake. There were times where I was near enough to witness his interaction with an individual and could see in the stranger’s face they thought he was rude. I learned over the years that just saying “I’m kidding” after an off-putting remark doesn’t always cut it. Especially if the person you are saying it to you does not even know you and your humor; it really turns into an uncomfortable situation.       NOW I BET YOU ARE ASKING yourself why am I friends with such an individual and trust me, I have asked myself the same question at times. Though we have history together, I learned many years ago not to react to his catty comments. After awhile of not getting a reaction out of me from his remarks, he stopped doing it to me. Believe it or not, he did have some good qualities I value in a friendship; so, I put up with his behavior. It would be nice if we could cut out the things we don’t like about a person, but that is not the case. The way I feel about unconditional love is the same way I feel about friendships; one has to accept the entire person or not. For example, I had a friend who constantly cancelled plans we made together. I would reach out to see if they wanted to get together for lunch or dinner and they would be all enthusiastic about it. Then, a day or two before we were to get together they would cancel on me. Once or twice I can understand; but after several times I switched things up and told them to let me know when they wanted to get together. I am still waiting for that invite. In my world, that person is more of an acquaintance to me then a friend. For the friends in this comedy horror, I would be fine if we were not even acquaintances.      STUCK OUT ON A YACHT IN THE middle of the ocean, it didn’t take long for three best friends to get sick of each other. With Munro Chambers (Turbo Kid, Godsend) as Jonah, Christopher Gray (Christmas All Over Again, The Mist-TV) as Richard, Emily Tyra (Code Black-TV, Flesh and Bones-TV) as Sasha and Brett Gelman (The Other Guys, Lemon) as the Narrator; this film festival winner had an intentional snarky edge to it. There were a couple of scenes that got my attention, but I am afraid that was it for me. Except for the twist in the story, I was bored through the majority of this movie. There was nothing noteworthy about the acting and at times, I felt some of the action was ridiculous. Several scenes had blood and violence in them, with one of them starting early in the story. It is not easy to pull off a comedic horror picture; I did not experience either of them in this movie. Maybe the writers were joking around but I felt like the joke was on me after I spent the time watching this movie.

 

1 ½ stars    

Flash Movie Review: War on Everyone

I AM NOT EXPERIENCING A FULL WITHDRAWAL, but I am certainly missing the comfort of being in a dark movie theater. The governor of my state issued a stay at home order the day I was watching a film in the theater.  There were 3 other people watching with me and each of us was spaced far from each other. At least the film was wonderful, so I ended my movie theater visits on a high note. Driving home and hearing the news, my first thought was, “How am I going to see movies to review?” As some of you know, I am a stickler for staying on a routine. If I can, I go to the theater and try to watch 2 or 3 films in a row; I figure if I am there I might as well see as many as I can to save time from going back and forth throughout the weekend.  I always have everything planned, from the time I need to arrive to where I would park to making sure I have all my seats on reserve. Now that my movie theater routine was put on hold, I spent the weekend trying to figure out how I could create a new routine that will allow me the opportunity to see movies and review them.     A WEEK HAS GONE BY AND I am settling into the new normal many of us are doing. I read some movie studios will stream their new releases for a fee; however, seeing that the amount they are asking is sometimes nearly 40% more than what I pay at the theater, I refuse to participate in that option. I used to have DVDs mailed to me, which offered me a variety of films I could review, but a while ago, I switched the option to online. Little did I realize the online option did not have nearly the amount of titles as the DVD option. It has taken me up to 20 minutes to find a movie to watch from the list I have kept the past couple of years. However, if it means I can review it then I deal with the inconveniences. The reason I am telling you all of this is because I want you to know there could be times I might be reviewing a film that I may have seen some ratings or words written about it before I can review it. Today’s movie choice is one in particular; until I found it I knew there was a chance I might not think highly of it. Yikes, little did I know it was going to be such a rough movie watching experience.      WHEN TWO CROOKED POLICE OFFICERS DECIDE TO go for a big score, they cross paths with someone who is as dangerous as them and who can play their game even better. This film festival winning movie starred Alexander Skarsgard (The Hummingbird Project, Big Little Lies-TV) as Terry Monroe, Michael Pena (End of Watch, Ant-Man franchise) as Bob Bolano, Theo James (Divergent franchise, London Fields) as Lord James Mangan, Tessa Thompson (Creed franchise, Dear White People) as Jackie Hollis and Caleb Landry Jones (Get Out; Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri) as Russell Birdwell. This cast was the reason why I was interested in seeing this action, crime comedy. I can only wonder if they were as surprised as I was with the finished product. The story was nothing special but was dragged further down by the script. I found the dialog crass and monotonous; repeating politically incorrect phrases does not make it any more funny. By the time we discovered the redemption part of the plot I did not really care one way or another. It was a shame because the scene involving it was one of the few I enjoyed. If watching films of this caliber is going to be my new routine, I may go out of my mind with boredom.

 

1½ stars  

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