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Flash Movie Review: AXL

THE IDEA WAS TO SEE IF I was capable of handling a dog by myself. Granted I did not have a dog as a pet growing up; but I did not think there would be any issue in me taking care of my friend’s dog, except for the licking my face part. My friend was going out of town and asked me if I would take care of their dog while they were away. Of course, I said I would be thrilled to do it. This dog was their baby, who they had gotten when it was just a little puppy; so, I understood the magnitude of this request. Little did I know I was going to be tested first. Before the trip was to occur, my friend came over with a robotic dog; I am not kidding you. It was the kind of dog you had to do certain functions with otherwise it would go silent, which I interpreted to be dead. One had to pretend to feed and walk it besides setting time aside for play time. I cannot remember all the details, but I think somehow these activities would get recorded; the key was to keep the robotic dog alive. After two days of what I considered unreasonable, constant attention time; I removed the batteries and pretended the dog was sleeping under my dining room table.      DO NOT LET ANYONE KID YOU, but there is a difference between a real and robotic dog. The robot dog, though it was a cute idea and I am sure there are children who would have a great time with it, cannot replace the love and affection of a live dog. Coming home each day to someone who is so excited to see you is a beautiful thing. With their tail wagging 100 mph as they are running up to either lick you (again, not my thing) or get a belly rub, is a special moment in the day. I especially enjoyed during the winter months being able to sit on the couch with the warmth of a furry dog in my lap. It is funny I was just thinking if I had ever dated anyone who was not an animal lover and the answer is no. I am not saying they must have a pet, but I do not think I would be able to have a deep connection to someone who did not appreciate the love one experiences between a human and their pet. And though I did not experience it with that robotic dog, I would attempt it with the special animal in this adventure, science fiction film.      A COMPUTER GLITCH CAUSED THE government’s experimental, robotic dog to go missing. Programed to fight alongside the army’s soldiers, there was something about motorcycle rider Miles, played by Alex Neustaedter (Walking Out, Ithaca), that made the dog see things differently. With Becky G (Power Rangers, Empire-TV) as Sara, Thomas Jane (The Thin Red Line, The Mist) as Chuck Hill, Alex MacNicoll (The 5th Wave; McFarland, USA) as Sam and Ted McGinley (Pearl Harbor, Married with Children-TV) as Fontaine; this family picture took the idea of a boy and his dog and produced a lifeless story. I enjoyed watching the robotic dog who had more personality than most of the actors. The script was easily predictable that I could have sworn the writers just copied the blueprint from several previous films that had the same set-up. There simply was no excitement in this movie; I could not wait for it to finish and was disappointed seeing the film studio is hoping they can do a sequel. If it was up to me and this picture came with batteries, I would pull the batteries on this one and instead, pop in a DVD of Rin Tin Tin.

 

1 ½ stars        

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Flash Movie Review: CHIPS

STEP by step I listened to them explain how they mapped out their career. I was actually curious because the methodology I was hearing was foreign to me, compared to my career route. I find it particularly fascinating when an individual knows what they want to do at an early age. You see I had assumed most people went through a series of professions before settling on one. When I was a kid I wanted to be an astronaut, a singer, a window washer, a dancer and a veterinarian among other things. A friend of mine wanted to be a doctor since he was a young boy and that is what he became. It makes me wonder how much does outside influences play on steering a person to a particular job field. For example a farmer who has children; does growing up in the environment automatically mean a person will take on the occupation associated with it? On my daily route to work I pass a billboard advertisement for a dentist’s office that has a picture of the dentists who are a father and his son. I wonder if the son really wanted to be a dentist or maybe he wanted to be something else.     I want to be clear that I am not judging any of the possibilities I have mentioned; however, one area where I could be judgmental is when a person chooses an occupation for ulterior motives. There is an individual I know distantly who chose a career in sales so they could travel and “safely” carry on affairs without anyone knowing, including his wife. I know, I agree with you as you are thinking he is a despicable individual. To me a job should be something you enjoy doing or at least it serves as a greater purpose for something you want to achieve in your future. The two main characters in this comedy came to the job with their own agendas.     Frank “Ponch” Poncherello and Jon Baker, played by Michael Pena (The Martian, End of Watch) and Dax Shepard (The Judge, Parenthood-TV), had different reasons becoming motorcycle officers for the California Highway Patrol. They also had different ways of doing it which was a problem since they were put together as partners. This action crime film was written and directed by Dax, loosely based on the television show. With Jessica McNamee (The Vow, The Loved Ones) as Lindsey Taylor, Adam Brody (Life Partners, Mr. & Mrs. Smith) as Clay Allen and Ryan Hansen (Central Intelligence, Veronica Mars-TV) as Brian Grieves; for the life of me I truly would like to know how the cast felt about doing this movie. Except for the chase scenes and cool looking motorcycles, there was nothing I enjoyed about this film. The script for the most part was written at an elementary school level; what was supposed to be humor I found offensive. I do not know how popular the TV show was when it aired; but I can only assume, based on what I saw in this awful movie, Jon and Ponch were “characters” and there would have been exciting action. That was not the case in this movie. If I were you I would keep driving and not get off the highway to see this picture.

 

1 ½ stars    

 

 

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