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Flash Movie Review: Replicas

THERE WAS A NEWS ARTICLE ABOUT a celebrity so grieve stricken about the loss of her beloved dog, that she had the dog cloned. The puppy looked exactly like a younger version of her deceased pet. It appeared the celebrity had her pet cloned just prior to the dog’s death. From the experiences I have been a part of with pet owners, all of them did not immediately find a replacement for their furry companion; they allowed themselves to grieve and get settled into new daily routines first. I understand the love we have for our pets and we hate to see them go, but it is part of the life cycle. Besides the aching pain that is felt, I have had a tough time with the inevitable change of routines. Coming home expecting a happy greeting gets replaced with still silence. For some their daily walks were their only exercise or time for reflective thought. Just recently I was talking with a friend about the difference about two kinds of death. The one where the person/animal suddenly dies is harder on the remaining loved ones in my opinion. When the person/animal has spent an extended amount of time suffering before they finally succumb; then it is easier on the ones left behind because there is the element of relief that they are no longer in pain.      WHO KNOWS BUT MAYBE THERE WILL come a time where anyone can clone their loved ones. Maybe the clones will be identical and start off right where the originals ended, but I have misgivings about it. For right now I have a fear that people’s loss of pain will drive medical companies to hurry something to market without knowing 100% that all will be fine. I get this image in my head of those gremlins from the movie that change into hideous, crazy things if they are fed water or given food past midnight. Can you imagine scientists cloning new life that will morph into creatures that cause death and destruction? I know love is a powerful force and the loss of love can be utterly debilitating for us; but that is the price one pays to be vulnerable and accept love into their life. Maybe because of all the movies I have seen or my vivid imagination, but right now there is something about cloning that frightens me. Long term we do not have enough information on what could happen. Due to my feelings I was hesitant to watch this mystery, crime film.      WHEN A DEADLY ACCIDENT ROBBED HIM of the most important thing in his life scientist Will Foster, played by Keanu Reeves (Point Break, Matrix franchise), willingly risked everything to gain back what he loved the most. The only issue was no one could know about it. With Thomas Middleditch (The Wolf of Wall Street, The Kings of Summer) as Ed, John Ortiz (Silver Linings Playbook, American Gangster) as Jones, Alice Eve (Before We Go, She’s Out of my League) as Mona and Emily Alyn Lind (J. Edgar, Revenge-TV) as Sophie; this science fiction movie was startling in how it was poorly done. I mean bottom of the food chain nonsense. First, the acting was appalling; Keanu was wooden or better yet, lifeless. The script offered nothing new or exciting for me; pretty much everything taking place seemed to be a given. I will say, I was surprised by one twist in the story; but by that time, I did not care what was going on because I wanted the picture to end so I could go home. For me, this entire movie could be used as an example of what could go wrong by cloning a story that was done before.

 

1 1/4 stars

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Flash Movie Review: Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie

THERE always seems to be at least one in a crowd. Whether it is in the classroom, the office or a group of friends; usually one person is the prankster or jokester. I did not have the courage to act out in the classroom; however, I discovered I was quite good in coming up with a plan and then letting someone else execute it. I think the statues of limitations have long expired so I am okay to mention one of my pranks, keeping in mind I am not boasting or full of pride about it. There was a strict teacher we had who made some of us kids’ lives miserable. Looking back now I would not use the word “miserable,” but to a 9 year old who did not know better, the teacher was labeled bad. I discovered if you removed the cylinder of ink from certain pens they could be used to shoot spitballs. But I took it a step further; if you roll one end of the empty pen in lip balm and blow hard on the other end, it would jettison the glob of balm. If it was aimed at the blackboard it would leave a greasy mark. The teacher came into the classroom one day and discovered he could not write on the blackboard due to all the grease spots.     THROUGH my early school years I actually did not do many pranks. I was never one to embarrass a classmate, like that student who glued another student’s schoolbook to their desk. The only time I would consider doing a prank against a student is if they hurt me. And even then I would have had to be 100% confident that the joke could never be traced back to me. I am not a mean spirited person, but I used to be a big fan of getting revenge. If I wanted to get back at someone I would have to do the prank myself, not even telling my friends. I was good at keeping a straight face even when my friends would ask if I was the one who did such and such prank. Little did I know I would have something in common with this animated, action comedy based on the bestselling children’s book series.     BEST friends George and Harold, voiced by Kevin Hart (The Wedding Ringer, Central Intelligence) and Thomas Middleditch (Kong: Skull Island, Silicon Valley-TV), were always coming up with pranks to upset the school principal Mr. Krupp, voiced by Ed Helms (The Hangover franchise, Vacation). The 2 boys thought they had created the ultimate prank when they hypnotized the principal into their comic book hero, Captain Underpants. The joke was on them though. I was not familiar with this story; based on the kids who were in the theater with me, I would say the books must be written for the 4-8 year old crowd. As a result the humor in the script was geared more to that age group. There was nothing done that I found to be laugh out loud material, more on an amusing level. Some of the animation was similar to the style of those Saturday morning cartoon shows; it was imaginative. What saved this film for me was how life lessons (which I assume are part of the books) were presented into the story. Even if the focus was on pranks, at least something positive was coming out of the events. I was just glad I no longer have to be part of any pranks.

 

2 ½ stars              

 

 

Flash Movie Review: The Bronze

There are some individuals who have been fortunate to extend beyond their 15 minutes of fame, though not always for the best reasons. I not only believe everyone should get their 15 minutes but I feel many people do not even realize they already used part of their time. A person who performs an act of kindness, such as giving up their seat in a crowded train car to someone else or helping an individual with directions to a particular spot, achieve a bit of that fame in someone’s eyes. Before I say what I am going to say next, I want to first state that I feel everyone has the right to work as long as they are able and have the desire. However, I have seen some people who may be better off if they had stopped at an earlier time, especially when it comes to celebrities. There have been film stars who wind up hawking a company’s products or go on the lecture circuit and I am okay with these career changes. But when I see a celebrity trying to maintain their past “glory” by turning themselves into a caricature of their former self just to make a dollar or stay in the public eye, I have to wonder if they really need the attention and money. Since I have been reviewing movies I have seen some actors, even Oscar nominated ones that were doing work that was absolutely beneath them. Did they really need the money? When I was an extra on a movie set there was an actor in the cast that some of us were surprised he agreed to be in the film; it was a silly role for him. He was such a jerk during the filming, one had to wonder if he always acted that way or was he upset that he had to do this type of work now. It is similar to the main character in this dramatic comedy.   TO receive an inheritance bronze medal winner Hope, played by Melissa Rauch (Are You Here, The Big Bang Theory-TV), had to coach an up and coming gymnast; a job she felt was beneath her. This film festival nominee had a story that was relatable to viewers; who hasn’t done work they did not like? I could say it for my experience with this picture because I had to sit through this movie listening to crude, offensive remarks in a ridiculous story. With Sebastian Stan (The Martian, Black Swan) as Lance and Gary Cole (In the Line of Fire, Pineapple Express) as Stan, I sat in my seat trying to figure out what attracted the movie studio to okay this film project. The humor was not funny to me except for maybe a couple of instances and if this truly wanted to be a satire I did not see it as such. This may have been partially a story about extending one’s fame but the outcome in my opinion deserves to take back some of that used time.

 

1 ½ stars

 

 

 

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