Author Archives: moviejoltz
Flash Movie Review: Movie 43
It does not take long after perusing my reviews to notice movies mean a lot to me. Whether on a physical, emotional or cerebral level; there is some kind of connection made between me and the movie. From several of the comments left, there is an appreciation to the personal relationship that a film forms with me. That is one of the wonderful aspects of watching a movie. The way it can trigger a memory, make me think, cause me to burst out laughing; I love the way a movie can take me away so easily. This is why I am so thrilled to say there was absolutely no connection between me and this worthless, offensive comedy. To say I was stunned by the tasteless subject matters would be an understatement. After sitting through this movie, despite several people walking out, I felt every actor and actress should come out publicly with an apology. The movie consisted of several short films that were loosely connected, each one vulgar and tasteless. The cast is more than I can list here, but there are a few that stood out. Let me start with Hugh Jackman (Les Miserables, The Prestige) and Naomi Watts (The Impossible, 21 Grams). These two have been nominated for best actor and actress in this year’s Oscars. I want to know how they can walk the red carpet, knowing what they did in this dreadful piece of garbage. If Halle Berry (Cloud Atlas, X-Men franchise) was concerned she would never live down her role in Catwoman, she won’t have to worry about that anymore. Let me just say she reached a new low when she was mixing guacamole with her breast during her film segment. Add in Richard Gere, Liv Schreiber, Greg Kinnear and Kate Winslet; did all of these movie stars owe someone a huge favor? I could go on and on, but let me end on a positive note. This movie has earned a special place on my movie review site: it is the first film to receive a single star from me. I would have given it a zero; but when I started this site, I decided to make 1 star my lowest rating. Obscene and vulgar language in trailer.
1 star
Flash Movie Review: Quartet
Growing old is like watching a balloon expand with each breath, never knowing when that one breath will cause the balloon to pop. As my friends and I age, the subject of how we may need assistance in our old age comes up more often. It is particularly important to those of us who are single; we wonder what will happen to us. An idea we have kicked around is buying an apartment building, where we can all live. It would allow us privacy but we would always have someone close by if help was needed. In a similar situation this sweet movie was about a home for retired musicians. Idyllic days filled with music and singing, building up to the annual charity concert celebration, received a surprise interruption. It was the arrival of new resident opera diva Jean Horton, played by Maggie Smith (Harry Potter franchise, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel). Her appearance was even a bigger surprise to her former husband and resident Reginald Paget, played by Tom Courtenay (The Golden Compass, Billy Liar). With the heavy weight of clashing egos, could the show survive and still be a success? For his directorial debut, Dustin Hoffman (Last Chance Harvey, Finding Neverland) did an admirable job in telling this safe, predictable story. I think Dustin’s job was made much easier by his impressive cast. Besides Maggie and Tom, there was Billy Connelly (Mrs. Brown, The Debt Collector) playing the flirtatious Wilf Bond, Pauline Collins (Albert Nobbs, Shirley Valentine) as the forgetful Cissy Robson and MIchael Gambon (Harry Potter franchise, The King’s Speech) as concert director Cedric Livingston. From the film’s entire cast there was a true sense of history behind the characters, that was proven at the start of the ending credits. An easy and enjoyable movie to watch. A thought came to me as I left the movie theater: When I take my last breath, I only hope it comes at the end of a movie’s credits.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work
I have met a few celebrities in my travels, though not nearly as many as I hope to see some day. Las Vegas has been my lucky spot where I have seen the majority of them. There was the time tennis player John McEnroe and his wife Patty Smyth were walking down the street. My friend and I walked faster to overtake and pass them. We then stopped where I pretended I was taking a picture of my friend in front of a hotel marquee. Fiddling with the camera lens, I waited until John and his wife came into viewfinder range then shot the picture. The photo showed my friend standing next to the couple as if he belonged with them. Things like this have added an extra fun element to my Las Vegas trips. The subject of this documentary was someone I met in a Las Vegas hotel’s elevator. When she walked into the elevator it only took a second for me to realize it was really Joan Rivers and not an impersonator. The question then was whether to leave her alone or say hello. I could not resist and introduced myself, telling her I enjoyed her humor. Joan was quite cordial, thanking me and asking me if this was my first time in Las Vegas. It briefly crossed my mind to hit the emergency button to stop the elevator, so I could ask her a bunch of questions. I thought better of it because getting arrested as a stalker would be something that definitely would not stay in Vegas! If you are not a fan of Joan Rivers I do not think you would even get this film; however, I was surprised to find her story told in a funny and compassionate way. She deserves credit for what she has done in paving the way for the female comics we enjoy today. No matter what you think about her, Joan cannot be faulted for her work ethic. At her age keeping her schedule as active as it was shown, I only hope I can keep doing what I do at that age. As my cousin’s aunt who was a Hollywood manager always said, “You have to be a little crazy to be a star.”
3 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Mother and Child
Before I was born my mother was pregnant with a baby girl. I found out when I asked her why my two brothers were so much older than me. She told me about the miscarriage she had before me. I spent my youth imagining what life would have been like if I had a sister. There was a small part of me that always wondered if I would have even been conceived if that baby girl had been born. My mother would tell me numerous times that I was the only one planned. She talked about the nervousness she had all through her pregnancy with me up until I was delivered. Except for that one time, my mother never talked about that lost baby girl. There is such a special bond between a mother and her child; I cannot imagine how the loss changed my mother’s life. The relationship between a mother and child was explored in this stirring drama. Annette Bening (Ruby Sparks, Being Julia) played Karen, a single woman who had given up her baby for adoption over 30 years earlier. Naomi Watts (The Impossible, Eastern Promises) played Elizabeth, the grown up version of that baby. Kerry Washington (Django Unchained, Ray) was a married woman who could not conceive a baby. Each woman’s life was drastically altered by their circumstances. Not only was the acting outstanding from these three women, but everyone else was just as good. There was Samuel L. Jackson (Django Unchained, The Avengers) as grieving lawyer Paul and Jimmy Smits (The Jane Austen Book Club, Star Wars franchise) as Karen’s co-worker Paco. Each of the three stories was carefully crafted and directed, allowing for a continuous flow of feelings to permeate each scene. This movie provided a touching study on the effects a child can have on one’s life. If I had a sister, I wonder what she would have thought about this wonderful film.
3 1/4 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Mama
The middle brother who was the #1 renter of DVD’s in the country was also a master ghost storyteller. My cousins and I would huddle around him at family gatherings as he wove and spun elaborate tales of suspense and surprise. He would slowly build up the stories, shocking us with the sudden appearance of a flame from his lighter or a quick slap of his hands; making us jump in the darkened living room. The most innocent of events would be transformed into a wild frightening story filled with scary apparitions and spirits. What made his ghost stories so good was the way he slowly built up the suspense, taking his audience on an unexpected journey to a different world. These same factors were employed in this darkly hued horror film. There was no slashing of flesh, no spurting of blood needed in making this well done film scary. There were times when the music would give away the upcoming twist, but it was the use of shadows that propelled the tension forward. Uncle Lucas, played by Nikolas Coster-Waldau (Kingdom of Heaven, Headhunters), had been searching five years for his missing nieces, before he was notified they had been found alone in an abandoned house in the wilderness. Lucas and his girlfriend Annabel, played by Jessica Chastain (Zero Dark Thirty, Take Shelter), would help reintroduce the girls into the living world by becoming their guardians. What the couple did not realize was the girls already had a protective guardian. Taking on a different kind of role, Jessica still brought her considerable strong acting skills to her character. Megan Charpentier (Red Riding Hood, Jennifer’s Body) and Isabelle Nelisse (Mirador-TV) were absolutely creepy as the nieces Victoria and Lilly. There was never a time where I jumped out of my seat from fright; however, the tension and suspense kept me captive. It was done in a similar way like my brother used to do with his stories when I was a kid.
2 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Last Stand
He wasn’t lying when he said he would be back. When Arnold Schwarzenegger (True Lies, Predator) first came on the movie scene he was an imposing figure. The roles Arnold had were not meant to stretch him as an actor; he was not known for his great acting skills. He was more the cartoon super hero type, who had some iconic lines that have stayed through a generation of moviegoers. With a freshened face, older and slower, this Arnold realized he could not do the same stunts of yesteryear. And that was exactly the reason I enjoyed this action film. It took him longer to recover from a fall as he complained of being tired. In fact, he had to take out a pair of glasses to read a report. Arnold was Sheriff Ray Owens of Sommerton Junction. His town was the last stop before the Mexican border and Sheriff Owens was the FBI’s last hope to stop Mexican drug cartel leader Gabriel Cortez, played by Eduardo Noriega (The Devil’s Backbone, The Method). With Johnny Knoxville (Jackass franchise, The Ringer) and Luis Guzman (Anger Management, Boogie Nights) as the sheriff’s deputies Lewis Dinkum and Mike Figuerola, there was a comic streak thrown into the scenes. It was because of the comedy I felt Forest Whitaker (Phone Booth, The Last King of Scotland) was hired as Agent John Bannister. The movie studio needed someone with heavier acting credentials. All aspects of this movie were geared with Arnold in mind. Yes, there was a body double for him on the tougher physical stunts while the writers tried to give Arnold new clever, memorable lines to say. I enjoyed this fast paced movie more than I thought I would and part of the reason was due to feeling nostalgic with seeing Arnold on the big screen. Not that I was a big fan of his, but I always knew what I would get out of his movies–over the top fight scenes, fun lines and Arnold as the good guy. He was just a little slower and did not want to stay out late. Violent scenes with blood.
2 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Exit Through the Gift Shop
For all I know, I may be seeing the work of the next Andy Warhol or Banksy. When I ride the city’s public transportation inevitably I see a variety of street art and graffiti. Not the kind that a teenager tags on a wall to claim he or she was there, but the detailed creations that give me reason to pause and ponder their message or even their irrelevance. Part of my curiosity is trying to figure out how the person even reached the location to place their work. This documentary gave me an inside look into the whole process and I found it wildly fascinating. The film began with the story of Frenchman Thierry Guetta, a Los Angeles shop owner. With video camera in hand, Thierry fell into recording street artists. His quirkiness and charm somehow worked; artists began trusting him, allowing Thierry to document their work in action. One of the most infamous street artists was the individual who called himself Banksy. His detailed stenciled art had become well known throughout the world. Thierry was determined to track down this artist, but when he finally met the person, Thierry’s camera lens would be turned back on himself. I know art is a personal thing for everyone. What one person calls art, another could call it junk. It should not make a difference for enjoying this funny documentary. In my naivete I had no idea Shepard Fairey, the man associated with the famous blue and red Obama campaign poster, was a graffiti artist. Or that Mr. Brainwash did the cover art for Madonna’s Greatest Hits Collection CD. The risks these creative people took was startling. Since Banksy was credited with directing this movie, I honestly did not know how much was believable and I did not care. The build up to Mr. Brainwash’s show felt surreal to me. The creative mind is a wonderful thing and watching it in action throughout this film was exciting.
3 1/2 stars — DVD
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