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Flash Movie Review: Warm Bodies
Love is coming home where a warm hug is waiting to brush the trying day off of you. Waking up to a gentle protective breath on your neck that kept dark dreams away through the night is love. Comfort in knowing that if you make a mistake it will not diminish one’s love for you. Even the unexpected card filled with caring thoughts is a form of love. Taylor Dayne’s song “Love will Lead you Back” would be apropos to describe this romantic comedy. From the director of 50/50, Jonathan Levine created a funny horror movie that was a relative to the story of Romeo and Juliette. Nicholas Hoult was the unusual zombie named R. On a night of feasting on humans; R became enthralled with Julie, played by Teresa Palmer (The Sorcerer’s Apprentice, Bedtime Stories), after making a meal of her boyfriend. Determined to protect her, R formed an unexpected relationship with Julie that would change the world. But R did not know Julie’s father Grigio, played by John Malkovich (Burn After Reading, Con Air), was the leader of the human zombie killers. I was totally taken by surprise with the smart and witty dialog. Nicholas and Teresa were perfectly matched, adding authenticity to their characters. Playing R’s friend M, Rob Cordday (Cedar Rapids, W.) was wonderful in his role, coming up with some great lines. My only regret was the small amount of screen time Analeigh Tipton (Damsels in Distress, The Green Hornet) had playing Julie’s friend Nora. A very entertaining film that was rated PG-13 had brief scenes of blood and gore. I was completely surprised by this fun movie. Who knew this zombie film came with a big heart.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
My introduction to the brothers Grimm was through animated movies. I can remember being perched atop folded coats on my theater seat, so I would have a clear view of the movie screen. Cinderella dressed in her magical ball gown or the poisoned apple that induced eternal slumber for Sleeping Beauty were characters that amazed me, when I saw them up on the big screen. At a time before movie characters were marketed into every conceivable consumer product, I stored a variety of Grimm fairy tale characters in my imagination. Let me first say I am not a purist when it comes to keeping a story true to its original form. If the story can still be entertaining, I am fine with it. Unfortunately this abomination lacked the entertainment factor, besides a variety of other things. The movie updated the story of Hansel and Gretel by turning the brother and sister into adult witch hunters. Sure I get it, nearly cooked in an oven by an evil witch as kids; I could buy into their chosen profession. What I found out of character was having the two talking in a contemporary style, dropping the “F” word freely. It was foolish to have fairy tale characters from olden days swearing like thugs. Jeremy Renner (The Hurt Locker, The Bourne Legacy) was Hansel and we were led to believe he was a diabetic. He wore a special wristwatch that rang every 2 hours, reminding him to take an injection that would keep him alive. It was so ridiculous I knew the concept was only there to be used later in the boring story. Gemma Arterton (Quantum of Solace, Clash of the Titans) was the sharpshooter Gretel. The two were hired by a town to find a witch that was stealing children. What Hansel and Gretel found was a diabolical plot by the powerful witch Muriel, played by Famke Janssen (X-Men franchise, Goldeneye). In a nutshell the acting was miserable, the special effects were bland, the story was putrid and I resented the movie studio for tarnishing a classic tale.
1 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Mama
The middle brother who was the #1 renter of DVD’s in the country was also a master ghost storyteller. My cousins and I would huddle around him at family gatherings as he wove and spun elaborate tales of suspense and surprise. He would slowly build up the stories, shocking us with the sudden appearance of a flame from his lighter or a quick slap of his hands; making us jump in the darkened living room. The most innocent of events would be transformed into a wild frightening story filled with scary apparitions and spirits. What made his ghost stories so good was the way he slowly built up the suspense, taking his audience on an unexpected journey to a different world. These same factors were employed in this darkly hued horror film. There was no slashing of flesh, no spurting of blood needed in making this well done film scary. There were times when the music would give away the upcoming twist, but it was the use of shadows that propelled the tension forward. Uncle Lucas, played by Nikolas Coster-Waldau (Kingdom of Heaven, Headhunters), had been searching five years for his missing nieces, before he was notified they had been found alone in an abandoned house in the wilderness. Lucas and his girlfriend Annabel, played by Jessica Chastain (Zero Dark Thirty, Take Shelter), would help reintroduce the girls into the living world by becoming their guardians. What the couple did not realize was the girls already had a protective guardian. Taking on a different kind of role, Jessica still brought her considerable strong acting skills to her character. Megan Charpentier (Red Riding Hood, Jennifer’s Body) and Isabelle Nelisse (Mirador-TV) were absolutely creepy as the nieces Victoria and Lilly. There was never a time where I jumped out of my seat from fright; however, the tension and suspense kept me captive. It was done in a similar way like my brother used to do with his stories when I was a kid.
2 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Ladyhawke
Pretty Boy was our family’s female parakeet. Do not ask about her name. She was the dog we could not have in our 3rd floor apartment. For me she was not just a parakeet, she was a hawk. Except when Pretty Boy was asleep for the night, her cage door was always open. When one of my brothers or I entered the room she would fly to our shoulder to greet us. I would tell her to attack any one of my friends who happened to be over and she would take off and circle them before coming back to my outstretched arm. And get this: when my family would be gathered around the television for the Academy Awards show, she would fly down onto the floor and sit with me. Since her I have always had an interest in flying, so this fantasy film would certainly be something I would watch. For a fantasy there were few magical things; the movie essentially was a love story. Rutger Hauer (Sin City, Blade Runner) was Captain Ethenne Navarre who joined up with young thief Phillipe Gaston, played by Matthew Broderick (Glory, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off), for help in sneaking up and surprising the corrupt bishop. For you see the bishop, played by John Wood (Chocolat, Sabrina), had cast a spell on Captain Navarre and his love Isabeau d’Anjou, played by Michelle Pfeiffer (People Like Us, Stardust). At nightfall the Captain would turn into a wolf and at daybreak Isabeau would turn into a hawk. Directed by Richard Donner (Superman franchise, Radio Flyer), this sweet movie harkened back to a time where the story drove the movie instead of special effects. There were well staged fight scenes and it was fun watching a young Matthew Broderick. I especially enjoyed the performance of Leo McKern (A Man for All Season, Rumpole of the Bailey-TV) as Father Imperiust the Monk. This fanciful movie did not reach my highest rating, but I still took pleasure in the way I floated along with the story.
2 3/4 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole
My cousin’s real parents were a king and queen. She was switched at birth for protection. At least that was what my father told me and my cousins when we were small. Growing up in my family always involved the telling and listening of stories. Some were based on true facts, others were a total fantasy. The story of my father being hidden in the woods for safety as a baby was true; but that story about my cousin was not. She really was not a princess–though she would have enjoyed being treated like one. Our family stories truly provided the latest generation a history of their heritage. My love of stories is what attracted me to this animated movie. Based on The Guardians of Ga’Hoole book series by Kathryn Lasky, the movie was about brother owls Soren and Kludd, voiced by Jim Sturgess (Across the Universe, Cloud Atlas) and Ryan Kwanten (True Blood-TV, Don’t Fade). Kidnapped and forced into slavery by a group of owls who called themselves the Pure Ones, Soren’s only hope was to escape and find the owls of Ga’Hoole. From his father’s stories, Soren believed these guardian owls existed and could free all the enslaved owls. What made this film stand out for me immediately was the directing of the visually artistic scenes. Director Zack Snyder (Watchmen, 300) created a stunning movie that was different then the usual CGI animated movies. Besides the owls’ regal appearances and the use of slow motion in the action scenes; I enjoyed the choice of actors used to voice the owls, such as Helen Mirren (Hitchcock, Red) as Nyra and Joel Edgerton (The Odd Life of Timothy Green, The Thing) as Metalbeak. The story was weak due to its predictability, yet I still found the movie exciting. This film may not be suitable for younger children due to the fighting and killing that was shown. The threads of told past stories have woven a rich family history for me and now Soren will be part of his family’s stories.
3 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Cirque du Soleil: Worlds Away
Many years ago a Cirque du Soleil show saved me from a debilitating blue funk. I had been blindsided by the breakup of a relationship that left me numb. Each day was a struggle to get out of bed and function in the daily routine of life. Planned months prior to all of this, I had tickets to see a Cirque du Soleil show that had been traveling around the country. The performance started with the sound of high pitched chimes randomly ringing. Though I was not in the best frame of mind, I became intrigued with the outrageously colored costumes worn by the performers. We were 20 minutes into the show when a group of clowns took to the stage. Not being a big fan of clowns I started paying more attention to the audience members’ reactions to the skit playing out on stage. Suddenly I was hit with a blast of wind that pressed my curly hair back against my scalp. I turned my gaze back to the stage where a couple of clowns had dragged a huge industrial fan onto a platform. The scene playing out in front of me was a clown trying to maintain his place without the wind machine blowing him off the stage. I was seated directly behind this clown, feeling the effects of the steady wind stream. Two clowns on either side of the fan were pouring confetti in front, creating a blizzard like visual escapade. I burst out with laughter as the confetti whirled pass me; realizing at that very moment, I had forgotten what it felt like to laugh. From that point on I have always had a soft spot inside of me for Cirque du Soleil. If you have never seen a show of theirs, this movie would be the perfect opportunity to experience them. The price of a movie ticket would be a major bargain compared to their live show ticket prices. The story is quite minimal; a young woman at a carnival attempts to save an aerialist when he missed a grab, falling to the earth. The two get sucked into the ground, where they are transported to a different world made up of a series of tents. The woman travels to each tent in search of the missing aerialist. Some of you may have already guessed that each tent was a scene from one of the Cirque shows. There were acts from several of the Las Vegas shows like O and Love. Seeing them in 3D did nothing for me. Honestly it added a weirdness to the acts, dulling some of the magic they usually create. If you have seen a few of their shows already, this movie would not leave a lasting impression on you. The film essentially is a long advertisement for Cirque’s permanent shows. It would have helped if they spent a little more on the story and use the medium of film to enhance the visual experience. Nonetheless I cannot bad mouth Cirque du Soleil for what they did for me so many years ago. And I now have my very own Cirque red and orange souvenir 3D glasses that were given to us at the movie theater.
2 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Big Fish
A storyteller takes something ordinary and makes it interesting. With an added twist of words the mundane can be transformed into an extraordinary tale. Before I even began my schooling, I was exposed to a master storyteller–my father. Out of the entire family, my dad was the person who provided tall tales and comic relief for everyone. Anyone who was within ear shot would be drawn into my father’s fabrications. As a salesman, he covered the entire city and always found fodder for his next anecodote. The story of my dad stopping by to surprise my mother and me at the grocery store was completely transformed when he retold it. He would say he went into the store and found me crying at the service desk, separated from my mother. When the service manager asked him who he was, my dad said he was my father. The manager turned and asked me if that was my dad and all I could cry for was my mother, never acknowledging my father. It was these tall tales I grew up with and why this touching movie resonated with me. Albert Finney (Erin Brockovich, Annie) was the colorful character Ed Bloom. After being diagnosed with cancer; his estranged son Will, played by Billy Crudup (Almost Famous, Watchmen), returned home to reconcile with his dad and find out the truth behind the wild stories he had heard growing up. Told in flashbacks the younger Ed Bloom was portrayed by Ewan McGregor (The Impossible, Beginners). Director Tim Burton (Beetlejuice, Planet of the Apes) surprised me with this touching, imaginative story. The entire cast blended together so well, that I had no trouble going from fanciful stories to current reality. Jessica Lange was wonderful as she played Ed’s grounded wife Sandra. It was fun to see a younger Steve Buscemi (Fargo, Reservoir Dogs), Danny DeVito (Batman Returns, Twins), Marion Cotillard (Inception, Contagion) and Helena Bonham Carter (Les Miserables, Harry Potter franchise) make up part of the ensemble. This charming movie is being turned into a Broadway play. I believe it will easily transfer to the big stage and do quite well for this simple reason: if you cannot exaggerate the story, then it just isn’t worth telling.
3 1/3 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: The Invisible
An ideal life would be one with no regrets from one’s choices. I still struggle with some of the decisions I have made; telling myself to stop it, I cannot change something that was out of my control. It does not always work. The answer may be to realize there was a reason for that choice, though it may not make sense at the time. As I started watching this movie, I began comparing some of the aspects of these high schoolers’ lives to my own school experiences. Funny how people can portray a particular persona, that covers up the true reality of their life. A remake of the Swedish film “Den Onsynlige,” this film had an interesting story line. After being brutally attacked by Annie Newton, played by Margarita Levieva (The Lincoln Lawyer, Adventureland), and her buddies; Nick Powell, played by Justin Chatwin (War of the Worlds, Taking Lives), was left for dead. But on the next day of school Nick showed up to his class, yet no one could see him. He would have to piece together clues about his disappearance before it would become a life or death conclusion. Does that sound confusing to you? Let me just say I found this intriguing dilemma to be a fascinating idea. I thought the set up to Nick’s attack was an excellent example of what type of consequences could befall a person based on their choice of action. Marcia Gay Harden’s (Mystic River, Into the Wild) portrayal as Nick’s mother Diane was well done, using her appearance to cover up her true feelings. The one character I had trouble with was Nick’s best friend Peter Egan, played by Chris Marquette (Fanboys, The Girl Next Door). His role did not come across as being real to me. The foundation of the story was solid; my issue was I felt the writers were inconsistent. Where some scenes were tight with levels of tension, others were loose and unrealistic. Though I liked the idea behind this movie, it did not make as big of an impact as I expected. Then again, one could say I chose to elevate my expectations. Either way, I did not regret seeing this film. A couple of scenes with blood shown.
2 1/3 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
There is a certain beauty in nature’s untouched landscapes. Having traveled across the United States, visiting 47 out of the 50 states to date, I have been incredibly grateful for what I have seen. I felt I was on a different planet while trekking through Badlands National Park and when I was at Yellowstone National Park, I finally understood the line “purple mountain majesties” when I saw them with my own eyes. Without special effects or being touched by man, earth can provide us an unbelievable movie set. Sitting in the movie theater with my 3D glasses on, I felt I was watching a PBS special. Scene after scene after scene of fantastical landscapes filled with soaring mountains and unfurling waterfalls, I did not know where to look first. If this was only a travelogue then this would be wonderful in its own right. But this was a movie, so I wanted a story to connect the beautiful and exciting images before my eyes. It felt to me as if the special effects were thought of first and then the writers put a story to them. Starting a new trilogy, I understood there would have to be a groundwork of explanations laid down to get the movie audience on the same page; however, it made for a slow pace in the beginning. Martin Freeman (Love Actually, Hot Fuzz) played Bilbo Baggins, a hesitant Hobbit who went along with a band of Dwarves to reclaim their mountain home from the dragon Smaug. Richard Armitage (Frozen, Robin Hood) was the Dwarf King Thorin who with the wizard Gandalf, played by Ian McKellen (X-Men franchise, Stardust) lead their group through perilous lands filled with goblins, giant spiders and other deadly creatures. Where the beginning of this movie was disappointing, the last half of this 2 hour and 49 minute film came together for me. Director Peter Jackson and his special effects team did an amazing job, bringing a new and improved Gollum, played by Andy Serkis (Rise of the Planet of the Apes, The Prestige) to the screen. The facial expressions on Gollum and the other fanciful beings were truly realistic. With the excitement ratcheted up, the steadier pacing and deeper chemistry between characters; I thoroughly enjoyed the movie by its conclusion. If only more attention had been given to the story as the special effects this would have been a masterpiece. As I was leaving the theater, if they had been selling postcards of the movie’s landscapes, I would have bought several to mail out to my friends.
2 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn-Part 2
Heads will roll if you mess with Bella’s child…and they certainly did in this final chapter of the movie series. After yesterday’s review that talked about the bond between mother and child, we have here another example of a parent’s love for their offspring. In this movie there was a new and improved Bella, played by Kristen Stewart (Snow White and the Huntsman, The Runaways). With the birth of her daughter Renesmee, Bella would need to master all of her new found vampire abilities if she was going to keep her child safe. The reason being there was something special about Renesmee that threatened the Volturi and its leader Ado, played by Michael Sheen (Midnight in Paris, Frost/Nixon). Since I did not read any of the Twilight books I do not know how closely this movie followed the novel. The story picked up right where the previous film ended, with Bella having turned into a vampire. I had hoped with this new Bella there would have been a better acting job from Kristen, but that was not the case. She never looked happy, with only a couple of emotional facial expressions, that honestly looked like she was a mouth breather. Robert Pattinson (Water for Elephants, Cosmopolis) as Edward Cullen played the role with a slightly more relaxed feel to it. As for Taylor Lautner (Abduction, Valentine’s Day), he did not bring anything new or special to his Jacob Black character. The first half of the movie was slow for me. I found it to be syrupy and melodramatic, with its heavy musical accompaniment. What I found odd was how some vampires had unique special skills. It was as if the writers forgot they were dealing with vampires and writing instead for X-Men characters. The last half of this action film had a buildup of tension that led to an epic battle, with a couple of interesting twists thrown into the mix. On a whole the writers of this movie sucked the life out of the story, giving me only an ok movie experience. I was disappointed I could not sink my teeth into something good.
2 1/3 stars
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