Flash Movie Review: Pandas
GROWING UP IN AN APARTMENT BUILDING, our pet bird was more like the family dog. We had gotten her as a baby when I was in elementary school. She was a very smart bird and if we had spent more time teaching her, I am sure she would have been able to speak. When I would walk into the living room, I would stand just inside the entryway and call out her name. She would jump out of her cage and fly right to my outstretched arm. Once landed she would walk up my arm to my face and plant a kiss on my cheek; seriously, she would do this every time and not just to me. She would do the same thing to anyone in the family. During the summer months I would ask her if she wanted to take a refreshing bath and she knew to immediately fly over to the windowsill, where I would set up her bathtub. One trick I especially enjoyed was pretending she was a hawk. With her perched on my arm I would tell her to “go get them” and she would takeoff and fly around the room once or twice then come back to land on me. BECAUSE WE HAD GOTTEN HER SO young, I wondered at the time if she had bonded with us like I had seen done in a classic comedy cartoon. Ducklings had hatched just as a different species of animal walked by them and the little ducks imprinted themselves onto this animal as their parent. I have seen similar circumstances when friends and family members have adopted a kitten or puppy. When there is more than one person in the household the little puppy or kitten can focus solely on one particular member. I know this married couple who got a puppy that bonded to the “father.” The female puppy wanted to be in his lap anytime he was sitting down; it got harder for him as she grew into a 65-pound dog. If she heard him sneeze she would race into the room and jump up on him to lick his face. I have to say it was funny to see her standing on her hind legs with her front paws up by his neck, licking his face because he was standing when he sneezed; it almost looked as if they were dancing. So, you are wondering now how the dog interacted with the “mother” aren’t you? The dog would let the “mother” pet and feed her, but she would have to go over to the dog to pet her. The baby/parent bonding thing certainly is fascinating; you will not believe how it was done in this beautifully filmed documentary. RESEARCHERS BASED IN SICHUAN, CHINA solicit the help of a man from New Hampshire who has a special way with bears, earning him the nickname of Papa Bear. This film was being shown at the IMAX theater at the movie complex near my house. Did it need to be in this format? No not really, but I will say the scenery in this picture was gorgeous. With that being said the stars of this film were the panda cubs. I could not get over how much they looked like a bunch of kids playing. With the movie only being 40 minutes in length, I enjoyed the way the story went because it evoked different emotions out of me. Narrated by Kristen Bell (Bad Moms franchise, The Good Place-TV), one would be hard pressed not to fall in love with the pandas. If the reason for filming this movie with the IMAX format was to increase profits, then I am comfortable with it if some of the proceeds are going to help the panda institute. My only criticism is the film was too short; I could have sat there for a longer time just to see what the pandas would do next.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Alpha
IT STARTED WITH A DISCUSSION ABOUT whales. She had seen a documentary about the plight of killer whales and we were in agreement about the harm being caused to them in captivity. I suggested another film about dolphins, but said it was tough to watch in parts. Our conversation took us onto the topic of zoos and their purpose. A foe of hunting for sport, she was not a fan of capturing wild animals and sticking them in cages to display to a paying public. I also am against hunting for sport and expressed my opinion, stating there is a place in society for zoos. If it helps to heal or populate the species I am all for capturing animals and having them live in a space similar to their natural habitat. There have been zoos I visited that were utterly depressing; the animals were lethargic, bored to the point of being almost comatose. At least they looked comatose to me. On the other hand, I have visited a few zoos that were making progress in perpetuating certain breeds of animals. My city’s zoo has been quite successful in breeding gorillas that are at risk of extinction. A zoo in the Midwest has the largest colony of penguins in the country. The work they have been doing with the animals has been extraordinary. EVERY ANIMAL WHETHER YOU LIKE THEM or not has a purpose on this planet; I firmly believe it. I better since I originally started out my schooling in veterinarian sciences. The only thing though is some people have a different idea of what an animal’s purpose should be. Recently in the news there was talk about what type of service animals would be allowed on airplanes. The list wasn’t very long but the part I found interesting was the list of animals that would not be allowed. A service animal is individually trained to do work for the benefit of an individual who is disabled in some way. Because I do not know anyone with a service animal I was startled to see that miniature ponies and pigs were on the list. Now just because I have not seen it with my own eyes does not mean I do not believe these are some individuals’ service animals. I have seen where animals outside of the home pet realm have bonded with humans. And when it happens it turns into a special relationship; you could see for yourself in this adventure drama. ON HIS FIRST HUNTING TRIP KEDA, played by Kodi Smit-McPhee (The Road, Let Me In), was mauled by a buffalo and left for dead. The wild animals around took him to be their next meal. With Natassia Malthe (Lake Placid, DOA: Dead or Alive) as Rho, Leonor Varela (Odd Thomas, Blade II) as Shaman, Johannes Haukur Johannesson (Atomic Blonde, I Remember You) as Tau and Jens Hulten (Skyfall, Wallander-TV) as Xi, this story set in prehistoric times had some beautiful scenes. I admired the acting of Kodi, but I especially of all the characters enjoyed the wolf the most. The script had no spoken English, so it was all subtitled; it was not a distraction since dialog was kept to a minimum. However, I felt the story dragged. Plus, some of the special effects were noticeable in the wrong way. Instead of enhancing a scene they came across as fake. I thought the idea for the story was wonderful and as I said previously I loved the wolf. The different reactions coming from the wolf made it hard to believe that the animal was trained to do such a thing. I am a sucker for a good animal movie and this one had good intensions; however, it needed some more training before allowing it out to the public.
2 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: Crazy Rich Asians
THERE IS NOTHING LIKE FINDING A bargain. I do not understand people who do not pay attention to sales. To my way of thinking, when something goes on sale at the grocery store I buy multiples of it to last me up until the next time it goes on sale. In addition, I am a coupon cutter; in case I need an item and it is not on sale, then I feel better if I at least have a coupon to lower the price. I consider this simply rational thinking. Yet I know some people who say they cannot be bothered looking for sales or cutting coupons. Though I tend to think of people who fall into this category as being wasteful, I try not to judge them. The group I have a challenge with is the one where people must tell you how much they paid for an item. I am not talking about those who share their bargain treasures of which I am a part of; I am referring to the ones who feel it is necessary to tell me how much they paid for their car, their suit, their earrings and everything else in their possession. I USED TO HAVE A FRIEND who had the need, like a compulsion, to recite the cost of every single thing he owned. If I complimented him on a new shirt, he would tell me the price of it instead of just saying thank you. To me it was bragging because it was obvious he was paying full price; it wasn’t like he said, “Oh you won’t believe it, I got this for ½ off.” I just recently bought a lightweight jacket at a store that is in the throes of going out of business. It was a $100.00 jacket that cost me only $20.00. When someone compliments me on it I share the price and let them know the store has other items if they want to see if there is something for themselves. But this friend wanted to make sure people knew he was wearing top of the line, expensive clothing. I did not understand it at all. Just because a person has money does not mean they have good taste or good sense. This is how I look at money; it certainly can help eliminate some stresses in one’s life, but it does not give a person superhuman power. Heck, there are a lot of wealthy people who are jerks, even downright mean. With my way of thinking, the story in this romantic comedy resonated inside of me. NEW YORK NATIVE RACHAEL CHU, played by Constance Wu (Sound of My Voice, Fresh Off the Boat-TV), was in love with her boyfriend Nick Young, played by relative newcomer Henry Golding. His family back home was none too pleased about it. With Michelle Yeoh (Tomorrow Never Dies; Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon) as Eleanor Young, Gemma Chan (Mary Queen of Scots, Humans-TV) as Astrid Young Teo and Awkwafina (Ocean’s Eight, Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising) as Peik Lin Goh; this film was a good old-fashioned rom-com. The well written script was delivered with precision by the actors, who all formed a diverse soap opera of family and friends. I understand the bestseller this film is based on is the first of a trilogy; if that is the case, I certainly look forward to a sequel. Out of the cast I thought Michelle, Constance and Awkwafina were incredible. There was one scene in particular between Michelle and Constance that was near perfection. The sets and some of the costumes were outrageously over the top; it certainly fit into the story. I could appreciate it since it was necessary; however, it was not for me the most impressive part of this picture. It was the truth of the story that rang loud and clear inside of me. There was a brief extra scene early in the credits.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: BlacKkKlansman
BEING INQUISITIVE BY NATURE YOU CAN imagine how I must have felt when I saw for the first time a world globe. I spent time attempting to memorize the capital city of each country. My interest in other countries was sparked early on due to several of my friends having relatives in foreign places. I was lucky enough to be introduced to a couple of them during one of their visits to the states and was fascinated how the words they spoke had an accent. As time went on I found myself gravitating to conversations I heard when I was out and about, to guess where the person came from based on their accent. Whether it was an accent associated with a part of the US or one from a foreign land, I wanted to learn a few simple words from each place. Some of my friends tell me it is rude or demeaning to attempt to say a few words in a person’s native tongue, but I disagree. I feel not only can it be an icebreaker with a stranger, but it shows my interest in getting to know the individual. For this reason, I have learned greetings in several different languages. NOT ONLY ARE THE WORDS IMPORTANT that we use, it is the way we say them. In my daily life I talk on the phone with many individuals from different parts of the world. I do not think I am alone when it comes to forming a picture of them in my mind based on the person’s voice. With my own experiences people have asked me if I grew up in a different part of the country based on my speaking voice. I do not hear an accent and feel like I have a newscaster’s type of speech. What I really get a kick out of is when the image I have of a person is so different from their actual appearance. I remember a customer I used to speak with on the phone, who came to my office once to deliver a payment. Based on his voice I had the image of a tall, brawny type of man. He had this baritone belly laugh that reverberated over the phone line. Though I was expecting him, when he walked into my office it took me a second to figure out who he was supposed to be. He was a short wiry man, with a receding hairline; nothing like I pictured. At least I did not share my thoughts with him, unlike the characters in this comedic film festival winner that is based on a true story. BECOMING THE FIRST BLACK POLICE OFFICER in Colorado Springs, CO; Ron Stallworth, played by John David Washington (Monster, Malcom X), wanted to prove himself to the other officers. He found a way to do it; however, he could not be seen because he was a black man. This comedic crime film also starred Adam Driver (Star Wars franchise, Logan Lucky) as Flip Zimmerman, Laura Harrier (Spider-Man: Homecoming, The Last Five Years) as Patrice Dumas, Robert John Burke (Tombstone, Confessions of a Dangerous Mind) as Chief Bridges and Ryan Eggold (The Disappearance of Eleanor Rigby franchise, The Blacklist-TV) as Walter Breachway. I felt this was one of director Spike Lee’s (Do the Right Thing, Jungle Fever) best films. The story was outrageous, but Spike and the writers truly blended uncomfortable and humorous scenes together to form a solid piece of work; that includes the juxtaposition of movie clips chosen to accentuate the message. I found everyone gave a solid performance, especially Adam and Topher Grace. This picture demonstrated the importance of words, no matter how they were spoken.
3 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: Dog Days
FROM ALL THE ANIMALS AND PETS, I have encountered, there are two special pets that stand out the most in my mind. The first one was the very first dog we had in the family. I was around 7 or 8 years old when this small black furred puppy came into our lives. She was extremely smart, knowing which rooms in the house she could go in. The living room was off limits because it had white carpeting. You could try and coax her to come in, but she knew better; she would simply sit down at the edge of the room and observe whatever activity was taking place. I do not remember her ever being afraid of anyone; she loved everyone who came into the house. Because of her I learned a new dimension to unconditional love and friendship. In addition, I had to be told what “being in heat” meant after a couple of dogs chased me down the street while I was out walking her. I refused to walk her for the rest of the week if I remember correctly. THE OTHER PET THAT STANDS OUT in my mind was this dog that my significant other brought into our relationship. He was a “pound puppy” of mixed breeds. He grew to around 40 pounds, this furry bundle of love whose tail was always wagging. I soon began referring to him as the “shadow” because he did not like to be by himself whenever anyone was home. He would follow you from room to room; in other words, from the laundry room to the bathroom to the bedroom to the balcony; it did not matter if you were in the room for only a minute. As he grew up there was one thing neither of us could understand; he took a dislike to children. Specifically, any child who was around his height. It was the oddest thing that we finally attributed to him wanting to be the alpha dog with any kid around his size. Except for this weird trait he was a very compassionate pet. He had this sixth sense that always knew how each of us was feeling. If I was watching a DVD movie that made me tear up, he would jump into my lap and put his front paws up on my shoulders to stare me directly in the face as he licked the tears from my cheeks. He was something else, wasn’t he? I feel fortunate that I had these pets in my life, just as the individuals did with their pets in this dramatic comedy. SEVERAL PEOPLE CROSS PATHS WITH EACH other that alters their lives, all because of their pets. With Vanessa Hudgens (Beastly, Spring Breakers) as Tara, Nina Dobrev (Let’s Be Cops, The Perks of Being a Wallflower) as Elizabeth, Finn Wolfhard (It, Stranger Things-TV) as Tyler, Lauren Lapkus (Jurassic World, Blended) as Daisy and Eva Longoria (Overboard, Lowriders) as Grace; this film had a few different stories taking place at the same time. It was not confusing to watch, but I felt it may have contributed to the script remaining one dimensional throughout the story. Besides being predictable, I never felt fully engaged with what was taking place on screen. However, what I did enjoy was all the animals. I appreciated that the writers did not write script for the pets, where they would need CGI to have the animals mouth the dialog. Instead they let the expressions on the pets’ faces do the talking and it was cute I must say. Excuse my verbiage but this was a “fluffy” piece of entertainment. You could easily experience the same feelings by going to an animal shelter and seeing the animals live. The only thing you might remember if you see this picture is the pets.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: Slender Man
WHILE LOOKING AT OLD PHOTOGRAPHS I could not stop asking myself what was I thinking to wear such a thing. I understand part of the fashion industry’s mission is to constantly update clothing trends, so consumers will buy clothes for every season of every year. If all we wore was a pair of blue jeans and a plain cotton shirt, the clothing manufacturers would not last long. As far as I am concerned there is no reason to ever wear pleated pants; this is just my opinion. The clothing choices I saw in my old photos could be classified more as a fad. I do not mean to disrespect any culture or group of people, but there really was no reason I needed to wear puka shells/beads around my neck. There was a time where wearing puka beads was considered cool; I have no idea why but as I saw other people wearing them, I decided I needed them. Another fad I went through was Nehru and surfer shirts. I cannot remember when these items were a fad but all of us wore them. In fact, it was extra cool to wear a Nehru collared shirt with puka beads around the neck. Please do not judge me but at one point I even made my own puka bead necklaces. IN WRITING THIS REVIEW TODAY I looked up other fads from the past and came up with a variety of items. There was the Slap Bracelet, Garbage Pail Kids, Push Pops and Jelly shoes. Most fads, such as the ones listed, were innocuous; they are what I consider a singular fad because you do not need anyone to participate along with you. However, there are some fads that have a darker side. What may start out as a fad could turn into a cult. I have to wonder if the flash mob videos that were posted online was the spark that lead individuals to start posting more and more daring or unusual events. Do you remember the Ice Bucket Challenge? It was a novel idea created for a good cause; but, do you think it could be the first step in people trying more difficult and dangerous challenges to gain notoriety? The subject of today’s film started as a fad that I saw in the news led two Wisconsin 12-year old girls to lure their friend into the woods to stab her multiple times, just to impress this fictional character who stars in this horror, mystery film. WHILE A GROUP OF FRIENDS START to check out the internet stories about the Slender Man, one of them goes missing. Starring Joey King (White House Down, The Conjuring) as Wren, Julia Goldani Telles (The Affair-TV, Bunheads-TV) as Hallie, Jaz Sinclair (Paper Towns, When the Bough Breaks) as Chloe, Annalise Basso (Captain Fantastic, Oculus) as Katie and newcomer Alex Fitzalan as Tom; I cannot think of one positive thing to say about this incredibly, poorly thought out movie. The acting was basic; add in the dull script and it was close to painful to sit and watch this mess. I thought the special effects were a total joke. Taking a telephoto camera lens and moving it quickly back and forth from near to far did not produce anything close to scariness for the scene; if anything, it simply made me dizzy. I was not familiar with the Slender Man; but if one should be fearful of him, this picture did not place him in the proper light. There was nothing scary or suspenseful in the story. If this character of the Slender Man was supposed to be sinister, then the writers completely missed the point. My deepest wish is for this fad to go away; I never want to see a sequel or hear about him again.
1 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: The Meg
ONE OF THE THINGS I FIND more annoying then autocorrect changing my misspelled words to something completely different is a person who never believes what you tell them. I have this one friend who for some reason must confirm pretty much any details you share with him, even the most random of things. For example, if I were to tell him about a travel survey I read that listed the world’s top travel destinations, he would have to confirm it by looking it up for himself. When I told him that the retirement age for Social Security was not 65 anymore, that it was now based on the year of one’s birth, he did not believe me and had to go research it. Here is the specific part that I find the most irritating; he feels the need to come back and tell me that I am right. I just want to ask him why he thinks I would make up such a thing. Now of course there have been times where I misunderstood what I heard or read; but not enough to warrant disbelief for every single thing I have mentioned. THERE ARE OTHER TYPES OF PEOPLE who like to see things with their very own eyes. Mention there was a car crash and they immediately want to see it for themselves. I am good with just hearing about it; though there are times where I am being told too much detail, especially if it is gory. Oh, and there are also some individuals who will share something they experienced or witnessed but add their own personal flair to it. I have mentioned before a friend I used to have who had this great saying: a story is not worth telling if you cannot exaggerate it. This is the category I fall into the most; I am all for telling a good story but keep the essential facts intact. To me this makes the difference between a good versus mediocre storyteller. I knew someone who everyone dreaded when she would try to tell us a story. She would have to give every single detail, weighing down her story to the point where you did not care how things turned out. And what made it worse was when the story was supposed to be humorous and she would explain why it was humorous as if you were unable to understand what made the story funny. I think the writers were not sure what type of audience was coming to see this action, horror thriller. WHEN MEMBERS OF A DEEPSEA EXPLORATION team found themselves stranded on the ocean floor, the crew’s leader felt there was only one person who could save them. He was a former, discredited diver who believed there was something lurking at the bottom of the ocean. Starring Jason Statham (Spy, The Expendables franchise) as Jonas Taylor, Bingbing Li (The Forbidden Kingdom, Transformers: Age of Extinction) as Suyin, Rainn Wilson (Permanent, The Office-TV) as Morris, Cliff Curtis (Training Day, Whale Rider) as Mac and Winston Chao (The Wedding Banquet, Road to Dawn) as Zhang; this movie felt like one of those “B’ type of pictures that would play as a matinee. Jason was fun to watch but I found the script predictable and basic. There was little suspense though some of the special effects were good. As the story progressed after its slow start it appeared as if the script was constructed with bits and pieces from other movies, washed together with a Moby Dick vibe. As far as I am concerned this was an afternoon popcorn movie; I cannot recommend paying full price for it. I understand some of you will want to see it for yourself; I do not have an issue if you do.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: Puzzle
THIS WEEK I WAS LOOKING AT a recipe for a cherry tomato tart. It was in the newspaper and it sounded interesting to me. As I was reading the list of ingredients and directions I visualized how I would prepare it. I need exact measurements listed when it comes to cooking and baking; I am not one of those people who can eyeball a recipe and put a dash of this or a pinch of that into the mix of ingredients. With this tart recipe there was one direction that caused me to have second thoughts. After I was supposed to cook the onions, butter, parmesan cheese and spices in a pan on the stove; I was to pour the mixture into a pie crust. Here is where I got tripped up; the recipe then said to place the cherry tomatoes on top of the mixture and overfill it because the mixture will settle down as it is baking. How much is overfill is my question. For me taste is not the only thing that is important in a food dish, it also is the look of it; it must be visually appealing to me. The way foods fit together on a plate means something to me. In fact, it is more; the way things fit together in everyday life mean something to me. THERE ARE SOME INDIVIDUALS WHO use their closet as a repository. Their clothes hang haphazardly with no continuity; work and play items mingle together, so they must search all through their closet when seeking one particular item. Maybe I am showing my OCD tendencies, but calmness comes when wardrobes are grouped for specific functions. Even with relationships, isn’t the goal when dating to see how each of you fit together as a couple? There are some people who meet and easily fit their lives together as if they had been together for years. Others find themselves in different spots yet have the awareness of how things could be. I would like to say being in a relationship is like starting a garden. One needs patience first of all and an idea of what they want their life to look like as they grow older. Then they need to choose the foliage and the placement of it to fully maximize its growth. A person would have to have commitment to their garden, tending to its needs and requirements. It is the same way for a relationship; working to see how each piece fits together to continue its growth. This dramatic film festival winner does a beautiful job in showing the viewer how things can fit together. AGNES, PLAYED BY KELLY MACDONALD (No Country for Old Men, Goodbye Christopher Robin), had no idea what she needed to spark her into living life. She would find it in a simple birthday gift. With David Denman (Logan Lucky, The Gift) as Louie, Irrfan Khan (The Lunchbox, Jurassic World) as Robert and Austin Abrams (Brad’s Status, Paper Towns) as Gabe; watching this movie was like taking a leisurely walk through a garden. I thought Kelly and Irrfan were completely devoted to their characters and did a wonderful job of acting. The story quietly unfolded in a way that matched the game that was being played; at least that is how I interpreted it. There were a few passages where I felt a lull taking place, but then the script would move out of it. I especially was fascinated with the dynamics that played out between the characters. The director really spent the time needed on each character to allow them to develop before our eyes. Though I was left with a couple of unanswered questions; for the most part, I enjoyed the way the pieces of the story were put together in this lovely film.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Darkest Minds
IT HAS BEEN SAID “IMITATION is the sincerest form of flattery” but not in the case of chocolate. To tell you the truth that goes for almost any kind of food. Let me tell you why I think this way. Occasionally when the grocery store is out of something I need, I will try the store’s brand. One time I had to buy their brand of raisins when they were out of stock of the ones I preferred. They were raisins; what could they possible do differently I thought. Well when I opened the container and tried them I was disappointed. Yes, they tasted like raisins do but they were small and shriveled; I was used to these dark and plump ones that had more taste. They were cheaper and of course I used them, but they were just okay. The same thing happened when a friend insisted I try this store that only sells their brand of products; they carried no national brands. Out of a small shopping cart of items I bought, the only things that tasted good to me were the sunflower seeds and nectarines. Their granola type cereal tasted vile to me; it tasted like dust. BY NO MEANS AM I A food snob, far from it. These days I consider food to just be fuel, except for desserts of course. However, I still want my food to taste good. It just seems from my own experiences many of the generic foods and products I have used are not as appealing to me. Heck, I even tried a pharmacy’s cotton swabs once and they were horrible; because they had so little cotton on them they kept scratching the outside of my ears. When it comes to new products many of them are not based on an original idea. Instead they take someone else’s idea and improve upon it. This is the nature of commerce; companies want you to buy stuff and continue to buy their products. This is one reason why there seems to be more film sequels to me. When a movie studio produces a successful picture; they immediately want to recreate the success they had with another movie. I have to wonder if the film studios check out their competition and when something is a hit, they try to do something in a similar vein, hoping to be successful with it too. For me the story in this science fiction thriller was very familiar; I know I have seen something like this somewhere before. You may have also. WHEN A MYSTERIOUS VIRUS NEARLY wipes out all children on the planet, the ones remaining become a threat to the adults. So much a threat that they need to be put away… or put down. Starring Amandla Stenberg (The Hunger Games, The Hate U Give) as Ruby, Mandy Moore (47 Meters Down, This is Us-TV) as Cate, Bradley Whitford (Get Out, Saving Mr. Banks) as President Gray, Gwendoline Christie (Star Wars franchise, Game of Thrones-TV) as Lady Jane and Harris Dickinson (Beach Rats, Trust-TV) as Liam; I thought the actors fit well into their roles. The story started out fine; it made me curious to find out more and I especially enjoyed the acting from Amandla. But as things started to happen I was left underwhelmed. This story for all intents and purposes was a lite version of the X-Men or anything like it. The special effects were nothing special and ultimately the script failed because it bored me. It was obvious where things were going and worse, it appears the movie studio is hoping to do a sequel. The best thing about seeing this generic piece of work was the price; with the money I had on the theater’s loyalty program, it only cost me 53 cents.
1 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: The Spy Who Dumped Me
FRIENDS HAVE TOLD ME I should write a book about all the excuses I have heard to end a relationship. You might think I am making them up but that is not the case; some of the ones I will list here were given to me. One of my favorites is the one where our relationship had to end because I lived in the suburbs. It wasn’t as if I resided in the farthest suburb that was miles away, where one needed to pack a lunch before heading out. My house was literally 5 blocks from the city limits; from my place to theirs was a total of six miles that was easily accessible by car, bus or train. From someone else their reason to me why they were ending the relationship was because I walked too fast. My response was to ask if it had ever occurred to them to ask me to slow down. How was I supposed to know otherwise? I have long legs; so, I guess I cover more ground quicker than someone with shorter legs? Several of the other excuses that people have told me they heard were: you are too intense, we have different interests and you are not an animal lover. AN IMPORTANT LESSON I LEARNED ABOUT break-ups is to not take them personally. I know, it can be hard not to take them personally; but in my experiences a majority of the time I had not caused the separation between us. There were times where I later found out they were going through personal issues that had nothing to do with me. I will say I have gained something from every person I have ever dated. At the time I may not have understood what insight I had received; but eventually, it would reveal itself to me so that I could get a better understanding about myself. Sound too deep? Yea, I agree; I do not want to turn this review into a session of therapy. One more thing and then I will move on; I was not always an understanding individual who would take the ending of a relationship in stride. Oh no, I could easily turn it back on them and get real ugly. There were a few where I not only gave them a piece of my mind but gave them an encyclopedia of derogatory adjectives to describe what I saw as their failings. And I never did it in a text message; unlike what happened to the poor woman in this action comedy. NOT ONLY DID AUDREY, PLAYED BY Mila Kunis (Black Swan, Bad Moms franchise), not know why her boyfriend Drew, played by Justin Theroux (The Girl on the Train, American Psycho), broke up with her; but now she was wanted by people from all over the world and not in a good way. With Kate McKinnon (Rough Night, Office Christmas Party) as Morgan, Sam Heughan (Heart of Lightness, Outlander-TV) as Sebastian and Hasan Minaj (Most Likely to Murder, The Daily Show-TV) as Duffer; if for nothing else, the only reason one needs to go see this movie is for Kate McKinnon. She is truly gifted; watching her, I had to wonder if she was ad libbing half the script. Her timing and delivery was wonderful. Mila was good; but Kate is in a different category. As for the film the script could have used a couple of rewrites. I found the story going from one outrageous caper to another, some bordering on silly. At least I did get some laughs from time to time; but these 2 actresses easily could have taken on a better developed story and script. I think with a little tweaking and work Kate and Mila could be a long-term, fun relationship.
2 ½ stars
moviejoltz 