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Flash Movie Review: Jupiter Ascending
I believe one has to look at their past to see where they are going in the future. The opportunities are plentiful if one looks at the past generations of their family, besides learning some surprising facts. Since I look at the world as one large supermarket, I am always curious to find out the heritage of any new person I meet. Listening about their family’s roots only reaffirms my beliefs that we are all connected in some way. I used to fantasize about my deceased relatives, imagining elaborate scenarios for them regarding their professions, their neighborhoods, even their hobbies. Hearing about family members who fought in battles or others who were inventors, only set my imagination into high gear. I wondered if any of these relatives’ genes were flowing in my blood. Just take a moment and imagine you found out a relative of yours did something extraordinary in their life; don’t you think it would inspire you in some way? I had a relative who played the violin; so when I used to play the piano, I would pretend they were accompanying me. Something as simple as that made me work harder on my piano lessons so I would not be the one to make a mistake during our duets. One never knows how the actions of one relative can affect another. WISHING for something more in her life Jupiter Jones, played by Mila Kunis (Black Swan, Oz the Great and Powerful), was not expecting it would be in the form of the alien warrior Caine Wise, played by Channing Tatum (Foxcatcher, White House Down). Little did she know her life was about to drastically change along with her planet. The first thing that grabbed me in this action fantasy was the visually spectacular special effects. Set in the city of Chicago there was one particular outdoor fight scene that used much of the city’s skyline. Though Channing’s character always looked like he was ice skating, it was still pretty cool to watch on screen. Written and directed by the Wachowski siblings (The Matrix franchise, Speed Racer), the visuals were this adventure film’s strongest feature. I thought Mila and Channing had excellent chemistry, besides Sean Bean (The Lord of the Rings franchise, North Country) putting in a good acting job as Stinger Apini. However, I strongly disliked Eddie Redmayne’s (The Theory of Everything, My Week with Marilyn) performance as Balem Abrasax. It felt and looked so out of place compared to the other characters. Sadly the script was a mess that never lived up to the visuals. It came across as a mashup of several other films like Star Wars and The Wizard of Oz. If the Wachowskis wanted an epic creation here, I wished they would have created a script that made more sense.
1 3/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water
The weekends not only meant there was no school, they also represented Saturday morning cartoons. I always looked forward to spending Saturday mornings in front of the television to watch my cartoons. With a snack tray placed in front of me for my bowl of breakfast cereal drenched in milk and a glass of grape juice, I would sit through several shows in a row. Little did I know at the time that some of the cartoons were doing parodies of famous operas or satires on public issues; I just enjoyed being entertained by a slew of fanciful characters like a ghost, a rabbit, a young explorer and a duck. No matter what happened to the characters they would always bounce back; ultimately good always won over evil. You can only imagine how excited I must have been when I found my cartoon friends starring in a movie. Currently from time to time I have been able to catch a cartoon show here and there on television. The first thing I usually notice is the way the animated characters move; it seems as if they are stiffer in their movements today than I remember when I was a child. The other thing I noticed about today’s cartoons was the lack of creativity but that may be due to them being shorter in duration than the old classics. WHEN the Krabby Patty secret recipe was discovered stolen, SpongeBob and his friends would have to go topside to pursue the thief who took their beloved Krabby Patty recipe. Not at all familiar with the SpongeBob cartoons, this animated adventure film was a hybrid of throwback animation and modern special effects. It had that high energy zaniness that I remembered enjoying as a kid. Even the animation looked as if it were hand drawn like they used to be. I can see where children would be enthralled with SpongeBob and his fellow cast mates because there was always things happening around them. The use of humor was abundant and quick, with some of it geared to the parents in a lighthearted way. I thought Antonio Banderas (The Skin I Live In, Once Upon a Time in Mexico) did a wonderful job playing Burger Beard. When the action came up on land, the retro animation turned into CGI effects that only accentuated the fun craziness to the story. I really was surprised I enjoyed this movie as much as I did, but I think part of it was due to nostalgia. Not to take away from the effort put into this film, but I wondered if the movie studio had the writers and animators study some of the ageless cartoons from the past before they created this enjoyable adventure film.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Centurion
Recently I was playing with a friend’s dog who loved being chased around the house. Though he was a small sized dog he would outrun me. It was so funny to watch him when he moved out of eyesight from me; he would stop and wait until I entered the room before taking off again. It reminded me when we were kids how we loved being chased by older relatives Actually I cannot recall any child not enjoying a game of tag or having someone playfully chase them. However once we start arriving at adulthood, being chased takes on a whole different, scary dimension. For those who have never experienced being chased let me describe it for you. The brain opens the floodgates of hormones for the body to take flight. As the heart is pounding in your chest, hearing it all the way up to your ears, your vision narrows into a tight focus as the eyes are constantly seeking out safe passage for you. Despite hearing your body in overdrive, the ears suddenly take on animalistic sharpness; you are able to single out the sounds stretching to you from your pursuers. And finally, time becomes distorted where seconds feel like minutes and minutes feel like milliseconds. DEEP inside enemy land a small group of Roman soldiers was trying to make their way back after a devastating battle. However, revenge would sustain those assigned to hunt them down, no matter how long it would take. This film festival nominated movie’s story was set in Britain during the 2nd century, starring Michael Fassbender (X-Men franchise, Shame) playing Centurion Quintus Dias and Dominic West (Chicago, 300) as General Titus Flavius Virilus. It was these actors that attracted me to this DVD since I was not familiar with the writer/director Neil Marshall (Dog Soldiers, Doomsday). I have to tell you right at the start this action drama had a large amount of blood being spilled throught it; I mean a lot. The acting was good and I especially liked the character of Etain, played by Olga Kurylenko (Quantum of Solace, The November Man). Except for all of the blood, I enjoyed the way this picture was filmed; some of the outdoor scenes had a great look to them. Regarding the battle scenes, they were a bit intense at times even though they verged on becoming cartoonish. What basically caused me to lose interest was the story; it essentially became one long chase scene that seemed to be repeating itself. I also did not think the scripted dialog did it any favors. There would be no reason to go out of your way to see this film; but if you had time to kill with nothing to do, you may be okay pursuing this one. Many scenes had blood and violence in them.
2 stars — DVD
Flash Movie Review: Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb
My obsession sprung out from one of my favorite children books, “From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler.” The idea of hiding in a museum until after it closes fascinated me for a long time when I was a kid. Having visited the museums in my city numerous times, I credit them for helping my mind open up further into the world of possibilities. One museum had a real airplane suspended from the ceiling that I never walked under as I made my way to the gigantic train set, with its various locomotive trains traveling multiple tracks through manufactured landscapes. There was another museum that would transport me back in time to when Pharaohs ruled as I saw their wrapped remains resting in elaborate coffins. I would daydream about sleeping overnight in a museum; going on my very own treasure hunts as I explored the massive hallways that I just knew had to have secret passageways. They probably lead to secret underground laboratories and vaults. I was convinced there was a whole different world to explore behind the sculpted granite walls of all those museums. SOMETHING was beginning to happen to the inhabitants of the museum that would affect their very existence. With very little time left security guard Larry Daley, played by Ben Stiller (Tropic Thunder, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty), would have to travel to London, England to discover the reason why his friends were being robbed of their ability to come to life after dark. This latest adventure comedy, the 3rd in the franchise, saw the return of cast members such as Robin Williams (Dead Poets Society, August Rush) as Teddy Roosevelt and Owen Wilson (Midnight in Paris, Wedding Crashers) as Jedediah; along with some new characters like Sir Lancelot, played by Dan Stevens (The Guest, The Fifth Estate) and Tilly, played by Rebel Wilson (Pitch Perfect, Bachelorette). For the life of me I had a hard time finding anything I liked about this stale film. Oh wait, the special effects were still fun even though I had seen them all before. The story and script were simply horrible. So pedestrian and plain, I could not find anything funny. There is a horrible expression that goes, “beating a dead horse” and I felt the movie studio was doing it with the release of this film. There was nothing new or exciting; it had all been done before, so what was the point? I will say most young children will probably like the film since it was colorful and took place in a fascinating place, a museum. On second thought, plan a trip to a local museum instead of going to see this movie.
1 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
It has been a long time; some people had relationships that were of a shorter duration. When we first met my eyes were dazzled by your beauty and my mind was tickled by your fanciful creativity. You showed me places I had only read about in books, never imagining I would see them come to life. I so enjoyed listening to your stories as the images you created appeared before my very eyes. You had this ability to sweep me away to a place where I could forget my problems and let the little boy inside of me come out to play. The years have been good to us. Like any relationship we settled into an easy comfort as we grew old together. Though my hearing and vision may not be as good as it used to be, I still looked forward to the tales you would tell me. After all this time I very much appreciated the fact you did not judge me if it looked like I was about to doze off during your storytelling; you know I never did. By the way, whenever I needed to take a bathroom break I always quickly ran there and back so I would not miss much. DIRECTOR Peter Jackson (King Kong, The Lovely Bones) and I started our journey back in 2001 at the release of his first film from his Lord of the Rings trilogy. Twenty-three years later we meet again for the last movie of his Hobbit franchise. This film festival winning adventure fantasy was just as spectacular visually as the previous ones. I particularly admired Peter’s eye for detail when it came to the scenes. Besides returning cast members Ian McKellen (X-Men franchise, Gods and Monsters) as Gandalf and Martin Freeman (Hot Fuzz, The World’s End) as Bilbo Baggins, there was newcomer Billy Connolly (The Boondock Saints, Quartet) adding a bit of life with his character Dain. Let me start by saying I enjoyed this film more than the previous one. Smaug the dragon, voiced by Benedict Cumberbatch (The Imagination Game, Sherlock-TV), who ended the last movie began this one with a fiery blast. What it boiled down to for me (no pun intended) was the script could not match the visual technical achievements of the scenes. After all this time there was a tired feeling to the last couple of pictures. It seemed as if this final installment was repetitive, with added fillers. For me watching a nearly one hour long battle scene was a laborious undertaking; it lost intensity as it went on. There was a “let us throw everything at them” quality to it. I am, however, glad I saw this movie. Our relationship may not have been as fresh as it once was, but I could not stand Peter up.
2 2/3 stars
Flash Movie Review: Exodus: Gods and Kings
Taken out from a religious context what does the phrase, “Let my people go,” bring to mind? For me it is Charlton Heston playing Moses in the film, The Ten Commandments. I was too young to understand everything about the movie, but several of its iconic scenes have been etched inside of my brain. It would be inconceivable to me to find someone who saw this film prior to the creation of current CGI effects, who was not struck with awe by the parting of the Red Sea. I can remember when we studied that time period in school; I would get confused when the lesson did not match what I remembered in the picture. There are just some films that remain with us for our entire life and this was one of them. So here was my dilemma: could I watch and review this dramatic adventure film without being biased. SURPRISINGLY I was able to sit through most of the action scenes without thinking about Charlton or Yul Brynner. The main reason was due to the special effects; the scope and expanse of the scenes were nearly overwhelming for me. I sat in my seat with stunned surprise at the amount of people used and especially the vast visual depth to the scenes. On a visual basis this film was beautiful, even though the 3D effects did not do much for me. Christian Bale (American Hustle, The Fighter) was excellent playing Moses as was Joel Edgerton (Warrior, Zero Dark Thirty) who played Ramses. However, Joel must have realized the script was quickly tanking as he became more of a caricature as the movie progressed. Directed by Ridley Scott (Gladiator, American Gangster), this film was all surface with no substance. I was saddened on how quickly I became bored with the uneven script that at times would be wonderful then quickly turn dreadful, especially due to the modern macho vibe. Though there was variety with the cast, I thought Ben Kingsley (Gandhi, Iron Man 3) as Nun and Sigourney Weaver (The Cabin in the Woods, Avatar) as Tuya were utterly wasted in this mess. I believe a good portion of the fault was due to having four writers working on the script. There was never a time where I felt emotionally moved by a scene. And of all scenes not able to stir me, the parting of the sea was such an anticlimactic moment for me. I wished the time spent on creating a visual feast would have gone more into the script; I was looking down at my watch a couple of times, which is never a good sign. To give the benefit of the doubt, maybe there are certain stories/movies that should never be remade. I am not sure; but with our technical prowess in special effects, if the movie studio would have spent more energy on the script this would have been a modern epic.
2 1/4 stars
Flash Movie Review: Penguins of Madagascar
True friends have the ability to reflect our real selves back to us. No matter how ugly, scary or false we act out; our friends have an open line to the sane part of our minds, reminding us who we are and to stop acting in such a poor fashion. I have a select group of friends who help me cut through the minutiae that spews out of my pinball brain from time to time. As the years stack up for me and my friends, we tend to communicate in a form of verbal and nonverbal shorthand. A simple look can reveal what one of us is thinking. One of the major facets established with these friendships is the supportive aspect. Whenever an event, either of a celebrating or crisis nature, comes up all the friends are right by each one’s side, ready to do whatever is necessary. There really is something to that phrase about “friends from the old neighborhood.” The people who have grown up with us have a special connection that is not affected by distance or time. BEST friends Skipper, Kowalski, Rico and Private; voiced by Tom McGrath (Madagascar franchise, Megamind), Chris Miller (Shrek franchise, Madagascar franchise), Conrad Vernon (Shrek franchise, Madagascar franchise) and Christopher Knights (Shrek franchise, Madagascar franchise); all agreed to work with a top secret organization called The North Wind. Led by the secretive agent referred to as Classified, voiced by Benedict Cumberpatch (Star Trek into Darkness, The Fifth Estate), the penguins would help to stop the evil Dr. Octavius Brine, voiced by John Malkovich (Red franchise, Secretariat), from wreaking havoc across the world. This animated adventure comedy was filled with a variety of clever lines and visuals, A couple of them went by so fast they easily could be missed if one was not paying close attention. The actors all did a fine job voicing their characters; each with a distinct enough voice to keep the characters separate. As for the story, it was geared more towards a younger crowd; it lacked the sophistication of some of the recent popular animated films. What did not work for me in this movie was the constant chase scenes. It began to feel monotonous to me after a short time. Fortunately I did not have time to dwell on this because I was busy trying to catch the fun twists to the printed words and sight gags flying across the movie screen. With strong themes of friendship, loyalty and commitment; I wound up enjoying this fun animated story. There was an extra scene at the end of the credits.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 1
How the heart swells at an act of kindness generated by love. Simple acts such as a small gift on a random day or a surprise visit to share lunch together expand the love that is shared by two. There are multiply levels for acts of love. Each on is as valid as one from another level; the only difference is the degree of difficulty. I believe a true love is one where the two individuals still maintain their love during life’s challenges. In my opinion, those people who leave a relationship when something hard comes up were never truly in love. For love is unconditional; it will not deflate when a person has a health challenge or disappear when one must travel for work and is gone for weeks at a time. There is the saying love makes the heart grow fonder and I believe it to be true. If love makes up the muscles of the heart then communication is the blood that nourishes it. LOVE was the underlying motivation to the events in this science fiction adventure film. Jennifer Lawrence (Silver Linings Playbook, Winter’s Bone) reprised her role as Katniss Everdeen for this first of a 2 part ending to the series. Having taken refuge in District 13 headed by President Alma Coin, played by Julianne Moore (Non-Stop, What Maisie Knew); Katniss had to be convinced in lending her voice towards the campaign to keep the revolution alive. When it was discovered Peeta Mellark, played by Josh Hutcherson (Red Dawn, The Kids are all Right), was alive and living in the capitol, Katniss agreed to be the spokesperson of the cause. However, there were a couple of conditions that had to be met. If you have not seen the previous films to this franchise you may feel a bit lost with this one. Things moved slowly at first which I attributed to the writers laying down the groundwork for the huge finale with the 2nd half of this story. Jennifer was her usual amazing self with this character; her acting was especially notable due to her having to pretend to act badly in a couple of the scenes. Compared to the previous installments there was not much action in this picture. There was more of a cat and mouse nature to the story. I did find it sad to see the deceased Philip Seymour Hoffman (A Most Wanted Man, Doubt) on screen playing his character Plutarch Heavensbee. A question came up for me during the latter part of the film. Since I had not read the books, I was wondering if it was really necessary to split the final book into two films. My guess was probably not but I understand how studios want to get the most bang for their buck. Though I enjoyed the previous film more, this one did not give me a reason to leave the series now.
3 stars
Flash Movie Review: On Any Sunday: The Next Chapter
For years I had heard people heap praise on all the great things they experienced when riding a motorcycle. I heard how the wind blew through their hair as they barreled down a road, with the early morning sunlight stretching out from the horizon. I have been told there was no greater sense of power than wrapping one’s legs around a rumbling, roaring rocket of pure horsepower. From all the accolades expressed, I became curious to find out what all the hoopla was about. What pushed me into committing to a motorcycle ride was seeing a group of motorcyclists when I was vacationing in the Dakotas. They looked like a flock of ravens swooping down the road with the tails of their bandanas flapping in the wind. When I returned home I called my friend up and we arranged to go out riding the following weekend. He arrived with spare helmet in hand, explained the route we would be taking and then told me how to sit behind him with my arms wrapped around his waist. Going down the side streets by my house did not seem like anything special. It was weird not having anything around me, like the interior of my car as we headed onto the main road. From that point on everything was a blur to me. My soft cheeks were rippling back towards my ears as my eyelids struggled to stay open from the force of the wind smacking me. The scariest thing was the variety of bumps and cracks in the road. Every time we rode over one of them I would bounce off the seat; this literally freaked me out. My arms with their now death grip around his waist and my legs locked into a tight vice over his; by the time we got back, I was completely exhausted. Any curiosity I had about motorcycles was left out on the highway and the final blow came the next day when my friend called to tell me he woke up to find bruises on his torso and legs, where I had locked down on him. THRILLS and excitement flew across the movie screen in this documentary from writer/director Dana Brown (Dust to Glory, Step into Liquid). Inspired from the 1971 documentary by Bruce Brown, this adventure sports film used sharp footage and a variety of riders to give the viewer a close-up look at how motorcycles affect people’s lives. Considering my one and only experience; I actually found myself enjoying this documentary, especially the Pike’s Peak run and Bonneville Salt Flats segments. I may not have had the wind in my hair or open wide spaces in the theater; but at least no one around me got bruised.
2 2/3 stars
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