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Flash Movie Review: You are so Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah
IT TOOK SOME TIME BEFORE I became comfortable going out to the clubs by myself. There were a couple of reasons why I would venture out alone; one, I do not drink alcohol and two, I did not like staying so late when many patrons were feeling the effects from their drinks. There was nothing worse than being stuck next to someone who could barely form words into a sentence, let alone stand on their own two feet. If I did go out with a group of friends, everyone knew I was the designated driver and I was okay with that as long as they knew they could not make a mess inside the car. Since I loved listening to music, I found myself enjoying sitting by the bar or standing off to the sidelines listening and watching people dance to the music. It felt like I was an audience member at a variety show. There was so much to watch, from the different fashion choices to the dancing skills to the foolishness of some individuals. Because I was somewhat shy, I tended to find an ideal spot for my people watching and would stay there for most of the night. It would not be unusual for me to tap my foot or move my hips to a song; I think subconsciously I was letting everyone know I like to dance. THE TIMES I WOULD GO WITH a couple of friends, we had a plan in place to avoid any conflict. It turned out we were all attracted to the same type of individual. We came up with a plan where we took turns on who would get the first opportunity to engage with that person. If things went well and they hit it off, so be it. If not, then the next one of us in line could try our hand at starting up a conversation. This all came about when two of my friends got into a fight over someone, they both had an interest in. I stayed on the sidelines as an impartial observer; there was no way I was going to pick sides. After that disagreement, we came up with the idea of taking turns if we discovered more than one of us was interested in someone. Now, you might laugh at this, but I must tell you we never had a disagreement ever again. Personally, I could never imagine having a fight with a good friend over someone we both liked, but that is me. However, if you want to see what could happen without a plan, then you might be interested in watching what takes place with best friends in this comedy. TWO BEST FRIENDS FOR YEARS HAVE been looking forward to their Bat Mitzvahs. With every detail planned out for every minute, there was nothing left to chance; except, the discovery that both girls had the same love interest. With Idina Menzel (Uncut Gems, Enchanted franchise) as Bree Friedman, Jackie Sandler (The Wrong Missy, Daddy Daughter Trip) as Gabi Rodriguez Katz, Adam Sandler (The Wedding Singer, Hustle) as Danny Friedman, Sunny Sandler (Grown Ups franchise, The Out-Laws) as Stacy Friedman and Samantha Lorraine (Kid Stew-TV, The Kid Who Only Hit Homers) as Lydia Rodriguez Katz; this film was filled with Adam’s family members. With that being said, I did think Sunny had a good sense of comedic timing and came across convincingly. The story had a typical coming of age theme; however, the script had a bit more punch to it, infused with Adam’s brand of humor. Overall, there was nothing great or terrible about this picture; it was simply okay. In my opinion, I would not go out of my way to see this movie, but if you have nothing else to do and want to fill the time, then this film might fit the bill.
2 stars
Flash Movie Review: My Big Fat Greek Wedding 3
THE FOOD WAS GOOD BUT THE conversation took a slight detour while we were eating. I had been invited over to a friend’s house for dinner. Of course, I brought a dessert with me, and it was a good thing since their kids had come over to join us. During the meal, I commented on one of the platters that had been placed on the dining room table. It looked like a platter my family used when company came over. I asked about its origins and was told it was part of a dinner set that was handed down from my friend’s great grandmother. I was immediately impressed that something so “old” had been carefully taken care of for all these years, since it looked so good. Plus, I loved that my friend had an appreciation for family heirlooms. I have in my possession a silver wine cup that came from my great, great grandfather who only used it on holidays. During the conversation, my friend turned to their two children and asked if either of them would like it. Both did not even pause to think about it before saying no. I did not say a word but thought it would be sad if the platter wound up in the trash heap or found its way to a garage sale or resale shop. I could see the disappointment on my friend’s face, so much for family history. I DO NOT REMEMBER WHEN MY interest in family history, heirlooms and such took on a level of importance; I enjoy learning about my ancestors and appreciate whatever small things they may have left behind for future generations to house and protect. For example, I have a framed photo hanging on a wall of my great, great, great grandmother who was alive when Napoleon invaded Russia. When guests are over and I explain the image to them, they each cannot get over the idea that this old frail woman dressed in a dark, floor length drab dress with a plain scarf tied around her head witnessed such history as a small child and that I am related to her. I ask you; how many people know what their great, great, great grandmother looks like? I feel if we can get some understanding about those who came before us, it will help us on our life’s path forward. Presently, I am debating how best I can distribute old photos I have of my relatives when they and their families were quite young. It is this idea of passing down a person’s history that I found so charming in this dramatic, comedy romance. WANTING TO FULFILL THEIR DECEASED FATHER’S wish to pass down his personal journal to his childhood friends, his children plan a trip to their father’s homeland, that will correspond with a family reunion. The problem will be how to track down these friends from a long, long time ago. With Nia Vardalos (I Hate Valentine’s Day, The Curse of Bridge Hollow) as Toula, John Corbett (The Messengers, The Silence) as Ian, Louis Mandylor (The Debt Collector, As Good as Dead) as Nick, Elena Kampouris (Before I Fall, Summer Night) as Paris and Andrea Martin (Black Christmas, The Good Fight-TV) as Aunt Voula; this sequel did not offer much to maintain my interest. The only two highlights were Andrea Martin’s performance and the beautiful scenery filmed in Greece. I did not find anything funny and thought there was zero-character development for most of the cast. The direction was poor because it felt like I was watching a series of vignettes. For the most part everything being done was predictable to the point where I was bored. I am afraid this movie would be something one does not want to hand down to a younger generation.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: Shazam: Fury of the Gods
HAVING RECENTLY RETURNED FROM MY FIRST cruise in decades, I was impressed with the diversity and camaraderie I saw on the ship. For two weeks, I observed families and chosen families support and help each other, in a display of genuine kindness. There was a group consisting of about a dozen or so people who were the best of friends. They had bonded and became a chosen family amongst themselves; I enjoyed listening to the travel adventures they had taken previously, along with their choice of excursions on this trip. I could see a real connection between many of them; it reminded me of my own gatherings where there was joking and laughing sprinkled among more serious discussions about various topics. One of the things that impressed me was how easygoing most of them were, considering there were so many options of things to do and eat while onboard; I would have assumed there would have been some disagreements, but I was never a witness to such things. Honestly, they were like a big happy family. One night was designated as a formal dinner event and each of them chose instead of wearing dinner jackets or evening attire, to dress up in clothing that was more aligned to a runway during fashion week in Paris; it was a sight to see. THERE WAS ANOTHER SMALL GROUP OF people I saw who might have been related, but I never had the chance to speak with them. One of the members of the group was in a wheelchair, which I must tell you was going to be hard to maneuver if they were taking similar onshore tours to the ones I was signed up to experience. As it turned out, they were on an excursion I was taking that involved walking up ancient stairs to a historical landmark. It was so touching to see members of the group take turns lifting the gentleman in his wheelchair up the steps. They would stop at each landing to swap out those individuals who got tired from the exertion of keeping the wheelchair in the air, while they themselves had to watch where they were stepping. It was a beautiful sight to see and when everyone in their group finally reached the summit, I saw the look on the wheel bound individual and it was priceless. These two examples reaffirmed my feelings that chosen family connections are just if not stronger than blood related families; however, one experiences love and support is all that matters, at least to me. This point stood out for me in this action, adventure comedy. WHEN AN ANCIENT ARTIFACT IS STOLEN from a museum, it becomes the focal point and the test to see how strong the family ties are for two opposite families. With Zachary Levi (Thor: Dark World, Chuck-TV) as Shazam, Asher Angel (Darby and the Dead, Andi Mack-TV) as Billy Batson, Lucy Liu (Charlie’s Angels, Elementary-TV) as Kalypso, Helen Mirren (The Duke, Hitchcock) as Hespera and Rachel Zegler (West Side Story) as Anthea; this sequel continued with the same type of humor found in the first installment. There was very little difference with this film compared to the previous and that was the issue I had with it. The characters did not display any growth in their lives, so the fun connection I had with them previously was strained in this one. Helen and Lucy stood out for me; they truly gave it their all despite the poorly conceived and written script. Even the special effects, I found, were underwhelming. If the film studio is planning to continue with this franchise, which is apparent with the two extra scenes during the ending credits, they will need to kick up the intensity, drama, comedy and special effects to better compete with the other superhero films that have been released.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: Asteroid City
IT WAS THE CLOSEST I HAD ever been to another planet and I did not want it to end. After seeing Jupiter and Saturn, I quickly lost my amazement over the moon and Mars. I even got to see a shooting star; there was always talk about one, but I had never seen it before. No pun intended, but my mind expanded in a new way while I leaned back in one of the cushy chairs there in the dark auditorium of the planetarium. It was my first time and seeing the solar system come “alive” above my head was exciting. The only reference I had to the other planets in our solar system had been movies and children’s books. I do not think we had studied the system yet in elementary school. So, you can see how stunned I was to see crystal clear images of the planets floating in the air, or at least it certainly seemed that way. One of my favorite television shows was Flash Gordon; at one point, I wondered if during the show I would get to see the planet, Mongo. Alas, it was never shown. I left the planetarium with a stronger fascination about outer space and the possibilities that were out there. THIS FEELING WAS SUCH A STRONG contrast to what took place in school. When I tell you what took place, there might be a chance you will not believe me. The reason I say this is because recently I was talking with a group of people, some of them educators, who shared their school’s protocols for safety. I was stunned when they said they must perform “active shooter” training with their classes. We discussed the horrors that are attached to it. For example, one teacher said they have a couple of students who were traumatized by a shooting in their town, and they must be excused because the training was too intense for them. I expressed my horror that we now live in a time where “active shooter” training is the norm. When I was in first grade, we periodically would have air raid drills. I surprised the educators because they had never heard of such a thing. I told them an alarm would sound and we would all have to leave our classrooms and go into the hallway, to sit down with our backs up to our locker, then cross our legs and try to get our heads down to our laps. I always wondered who would harm us in an air raid in the Midwest. It was a similar wonder to what happened to the junior stargazers in this dramatic comedy romance. COMING TO A SMALL SPOT IN the desert, a group of strangers encounter something unworldly that changes their perceptions of the world. With Jason Schwartzman (The French Dispatch, Big Eyes) as Augie Steenbeck, Scarlett Johansson (Black Widow, JoJo Rabbit) as Midge Campbell, Tom Hanks (A Man Called Otto, Elvis) as Stanley Zak, Jeffrey Wright (The Batman, The French Dispatch) as General Gibson and Bryan Cranston (The One and Only Ivan, Jerry and Marge Go Large) as the Host; this Wes Anderson film had all of the same trappings as his previous films. It had a great and diverse cast, quirky and colorful sets, multiple story lines and odd characters in the story. What was missing for me was the fun factor, along with a better cohesive script. Things felt forced to me. It seemed various scenes were tossed in to keep the audience entertained, but they did not offer much. I found myself being bored at times and not really getting a sense of where the story wanted to go. There was an element of humor and silliness, but it did not help to get me into an excited mood to sit and enjoy the rest of the film.
2 ¼ stars
Flash Movie Review: Haunted Mansion
WHEN THE CARNIVAL OPENED IN SPRING, it gave us the opportunity to see a second haunted house in our neighborhood. The first one sat at the end of a block that had lightly colored painted houses. The color of this haunted house was dark brown with patches where it had peeled away from what looked like rotten wood. It was a scary looking place, even the windows looked dark. I do not recall ever seeing them open. There was dense foliage all around the perimeter of the place; so thick that I was sure a child could go missing in it. The front walk that led to several dilapidated steps was barely visible unless you used your arms to move the overhanging branches that were sturdy and gnarled. All the kids in the neighborhood would avoid this house at Halloween. No one, even if they were with a group of other trick-or-treaters, had the courage to make their way to the opposing door that looked like an animal’s mouth about to let out a growl. Even after living in the neighborhood for decades, I never saw anyone coming out or going into that dark, spooky house. MY IMAGINATION ABOUT WHAT COULD TAKE place in that house on the corner was fueled by what I experienced at different amusement parks’ haunted houses. The one from the carnival was a cheap version of what was in my mind, but I still thought of the various scare tactics and transposed them into a deadlier version. There was a man dressed up as an evil ogre who would jump out from a dark corner and scare all that entered his realm. He really was not that scary to me because I saw one of his costume’s big floppy ears had fallen off, revealing his human ear; it took the scare out of the costume. Through the house there were various mechanical objects dropping down from the ceiling or popping out of the walls. There was a mist like fog that slowly swirled about but the air circulation and venting were almost stagnant, so depending on where you were, it was hard to see stuff at times. I remember one room had paintings hanging on the walls. One of them was a portrait of a man with the eyes cut out so someone, who was standing behind it, could press their face against the canvas and have their eyes fill out the holes. However, it must have been irritating them because periodically you could see a finger pushing across to rub the eye. It was not a very scary haunted house, just like the one that was in this comedy, horror film. WHEN A MOTHER AND HER SON discover their new home is filled with ghouls and ghosts, she turns to some local folk to help her in the removal of them. However, they are not ready to leave. With LaKeith Stanfield (The Harder They Fall, Sorry to Bother You) as Ben Matthias, Rosario Dawson (Unstoppable, The Water Man) as Gabbie, Owen Wilson (Marry Me, Father Figures) as Father Kent, Tiffany Haddish (Like a Boss, Night School) as Harriet and Danny DeVito (Batman Returns, The War of the Roses) as Bruce David; this dramatic family movie, based on the amusement park ride, Haunted Mansion, needed help. The story was never scary enough to draw a gasp or yelp from the audience; at least not what one hears when doing the actual park ride. I did not find much to laugh about either. I did appreciate the cast’s efforts to levitate the story and make it exciting, but it never materialized. For those of you who have ridden the amusement park’s ride, you will sense a familiarity with the sets and characters. However, there was not enough here to make this a memorable experience. Better to save up your money for the actual ride; you will have a better time.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: Pinball: The Man Who Saved the Game
I WAS THE ONLY KID WHO was too afraid to dive off from the high diving board. On a large family trip, several cars of relatives drove to a resort area in a neighboring state. When we arrived at the hotel, all of us were assigned rooms on the same floor. Since it was still early in the afternoon, it was decided we would all meet at the swimming pool. I was a decent swimmer but had only recently ventured into deeper waters. The pool had two diving boards, one low and the other high, but the low one was being repaired. All my cousins were excited to go off the high dive, lining up single file to climb the metal ladder to the top. I tried doing it but when I got to the top and saw how far down it was to the water, I started to cry. Though relatives were encouraging me to jump, some even treading in the water below, I could not do it. I still remember how humiliated I felt as I climbed back down the ladder and walked past the line of cousins who were too excited to focus on my failure. After that I did not want to spend any more time by the swimming pool. ACROSS FROM THE SWIMMING POOL AREA, I had not noticed a small non-descript wooden structure that looked like a miniature house without windows. The relative who was taking me back to the hotel room, stopped at the front of this structure and asked me if I wanted to peek inside. It was such a curious building that I said yes. There was only an entryway, no door, so we walked in. What was inside was something I had never seen before. There was this machine with flashing lights. Its body had a glass top that covered an array of bumpers, buttons and holes. It fascinated me with its colorful graphics that stretched across both inside and out. My relative must have been familiar with the machine because they placed a chair they had taken from a corner, by the side of the machine and told me to stand on it, so I could watch them play. Once I was on it, my relative pulled back a metal rod and let go. I saw a silver ball whip up to the top of the course, bounce back and forth a couple of times, then descend into the array of bumpers and buttons. It was amazing, watching the ball bounce from one side to the other; and whenever the ball got near to the bottom, my relative would press these two red buttons on each side of the machine to smack the ball back up towards the top. This was my first encounter with a pinball machine, but it was not going to be my last. A STRUGGLING WRITER IN NEW YORK CITY finds escape in a pinball machine he found in an unlikely place. When the machine gets confiscated due to the ban on them, he puts his frustration into his writings. With Mike Faist (West Side Story, Wildling) as Roger (young), Crystal Reed (Incident in a Ghostland, Gotham-TV) as Ellen, Dennis Boutsikaris (Batteries not Included, Better Call Saul-TV) as Mr. Shapiro, Christopher Convery (The Girl in the Spider’s Web, Prisoner’s Daughter) as Seth and Connor Ratliff (Search Party-TV, The George Lucas Talk Show-TV) as Jimmy; this comedic drama hooked me in quickly after a short time figuring out if I was watching a documentary or not. I thought the way the writers told the story in this biography made it more interesting. As a lover of pinball machines, I appreciated the history lesson being told in such an entertaining way. Set in the 1970s, the sets and costumes were perfect. Maybe other viewers will feel the same way as I did to find out there was a time when pinball machines, of all things, used to be illegal. For me, it sounded so absurd, and it was another reason I wanted to see this movie. This film is certainly worth keeping in play.
3 ¼ stars
Flash Movie Review: Happiness for Beginners
MANY REVIEWS AGO, I TALKED ABOUT changing up one’s routines after a breakup. Part of the reason was to create a diversion from any sadness and another part was to explore new avenues of growth. I remember an early breakup where I spent an entire weekend watching movies. If I recall, I believe I saw twelve movies in three days. In that review I focused more on the diversion instead of the growth that could take place. When in a love relationship, it can be easy to fall into a routine to the point where things become automatic, very little thought is needed. Sure, there is a comfort being in that state, but is it beneficial to the growth of the relationship? Honestly, I fluctuate between the comfort of routines with the adventures of exploring something new. I think that might be one of the reasons I love to travel; it nourishes me in a certain way that reading a book about the place cannot provide. But traveling is not always an easy project. I remember being in a relationship and the two of us taking a trip to Las Vegas for an extended weekend. Withing 24 hours, I realized this was not a good fit because our ideas of a vacation were so opposite of each other. By the time we were flying home, we barely talked to each other. Lesson learned: make sure the person you are going with on a trip is compatible with your expectations. SEEING HOW THAT RELATIONSHIP DETERIORATED WHILE on vacation gave me a thought that stuck with me for the next time, I found myself in a similar situation. It was a year or two after where I found myself at the end of another relationship. Remembering my Vegas trip, I decided I would take a trip by myself; it was a foreign concept I must tell you. I planned out everything from the location to the hotel to the activities. It was weird at first to be alone on a plane. I kept myself busy by reading a stack of magazines I had bought at one of the terminal’s newsstands. Once I arrived, it was a little unsettling to navigate by myself through the airport and to the rental car location; but I did it. I remember asking the clerk at the rental place for directions to my hotel and was grateful when he pulled out a map and drew a route for me. After I arrived mid-morning and checked into my hotel room, I ventured out to the first tourist attraction I had on my to do list. By the end of the day, I had walked eight miles and had seen several places I had on my list. I discovered I was resourceful and enjoyed planning out and executing a route to cover as much ground as I could to explore the city. Discovering this in myself was one of the reasons I was attracted to the main character in this romantic rom-com. AFTER THE BREAKUP OF HER MARRIAGE, a woman decides she needs to make some changes in herself. What came to mind was to sign up for a wilderness survival trek with a group of strangers. The trip would test her in ways she had not expected. With Ellie Kemper (The Stand In, Bridesmaids) as Helen, Luke Grimes (Fifty Shades of Grey franchise, The Magnificent Seven) as Jake, Nico Santos (Crazy Rich Asians, Superstore-TV) as Hugh, Blythe Danner (I’ll See You in my Dreams, The Last Kiss) as Gigi and Ben Cook (West Side Story, Paterno) as Beckett; this movie did everything by the book. In other words, pretty much everything was predictable. I enjoyed Ellie’s and Luke’s performances; however, the script was too generic to the point it did not provide any surprises. In fact, at times it would telegraph what was going to happen later in the film. For a story based on taking risks, the writers should have listened and done the same.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: Hidden Strike
A COUPLE OF MY FAVORITE INGREDIENTS for a dessert are chocolate and butter. Rarely have I come across a dessert with these two items included that was not delicious. The chocolate can be in the form of cocoa powder, chips, syrup, pudding or even crushed chocolate sandwich cookies. Those who know me know the dessert is the most important part of dinner. I do not want to say the entrée is just a formality to get to the dessert, but it comes close. Since I was a small boy, I always enjoyed having something sweet to eat after dinner. Chocolate has always been my “go to” food after a meal, but that does not mean I do not like other flavors. Being a texture and visual eater, I love the combination of flavors and texture. For example, I prefer brownies with nuts in them because I like having a bit of crunch when I am chewing. The same goes with chocolate chips. A good chocolate ice cream with chocolate chips is heavenly. There just are certain pairings that make perfect sense, whether they are familiar or something brand new; it just tastes damn good is all I can say. THE IDEA OF PAIRING IS NOT solely something for desserts. The first thing that comes to mind are the Bob Hope and Bing Crosby road movies, like Road to Bali and Road to Rio. With one being the comedian and the other the straight man, they made a great pair. Another pairing that worked was Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis; they did several movies together besides doing stand-up comedy. One of my earliest memories was seeing an old black and white film with Katherine Hepburn and Cary Grant called Bringing Up Baby. There was something about that film that grabbed my attention. Maybe it was the interaction between the two movie stars or the antics that took place; but the memory of it has stayed with my all these years. When you get two celebrities together and it is obvious there is a connection between them that works, it usually has been encouraged by their management teams and/or film studios. One can see it is a winning formula all the way around because studios still try to pair up different actors for a movie project. Just look at the film franchise, The Expendables. Getting a group of Type A personality types in one room can always provide hours of entertainment. This is one of the reasons why I was intrigued to see this action, adventure comedy because of its pairing of two action stars from different genres. WHEN A GROUP OF EMPLOYEES HE was escorting safely out of the country gets ambushed, a special forces soldier finds himself in the unusual position of working with someone who had similar training to himself but uses it for a different purpose. Can the two ever find a way to work together to get the kidnapped crew back? With John Cena (Vacation Friends, 12 Rounds) as Chris Van Horne, Jackie Chan (Rush Hour franchise, Iron Mask) as Luo Fang, Pilou Asbaek (Game of Thrones-TV, A Hijacking) as Owen Paddock, Rachel Holoway (Momentum, Ransom’s Law-TV) as Raider and Amadeus Serafini (Smiley Face Killers, Scream: The TV Series) as Henry Van Horne; my other curiosity was seeing if Jackie Chan’s character would be up to Jackie’s past fighting mode. The answer is yes, but it doesn’t look like Jackie did much if any of his physical demanding stunts. This was only one of many disappointments, I am afraid to say. I found the story to be a generic blueprint for these types of films where the hero must try to get someone/something out of a hostile territory while the villain tries to stop them. With a predictable script and poor special effects, this is a throwaway film. In other words, if you have nothing else to do then go ahead and watch it before you toss it away physically and/or mentally. Sadly, this was a forgettable pairing. There were outtakes during the ending credits.
1 ½ stars
moviejoltz 