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Flash Movie Review: In the Lost Lands
WHEN SOMEONE THINKS THEY ARE ALWAYS right, it is a good bet that person would absolutely enjoy having total power. I used to work at a fitness center where I had a boss who always thought she was right. Most of the time, I would not let it bother me; but when she decided that the schedule of classes would start changing every six weeks, I respectfully expressed my opinion. I could tell she was perturbed, but I did not care. To me, we instructors were there to serve the members’ needs, not my boss’s ego. I expressed how some of our members only have a particular time they can come to the center to workout. Members already expressed when they find an instructor they like, they want to stay with them. The proof of that was the fact I had the largest number of members attending my classes. My boss said it was important for the members to experience assorted styles of workouts and instructors. I countered each instructor makes sure to change up the exercise routines that are done in their classes, so the member’s body never gets used to a class and loses the shock value on their muscles. We went back and forth, point and counterpoint, until my boss said she did not care what a few members think, she is changing the number of times we will be changing formats and classes. And just like I predicted the members loudly complained and as a result attendance in general dropped until my boss bitterly gave in and returned the schedule back to the old format. THE STORY I JUST SHARED WAS recently expressed to a friend of mine who was telling me about the changes taking place at her office. She worked for a private company where the long-term president was recently replaced. What she told me was both frightening and sad. This new president was not discreet in showing his disdain for the way the past president ran the company. He was also determined to cut costs, no matter the ramifications. I sat and listened to my friend list things this new person already did and how his actions were affecting the employees. For example, the new president never listened to advice from anyone. Upon one meeting, he would already have formed an opinion of the person; most of the time he thought the person was inferior and would begin to treat them with disdain. After my friend was done sharing all her horror stories, I told her the new person sounded like a power-hungry dictator. I questioned why someone would want to lead by instilling fear in the employees who helped make the company so successful. It was a perfect example of absolute power being corruptive and destructive. I saw the same thing taking place in this fantasy action adventure. DESPITE ON A MISSION GIVEN FROM the queen to acquire a special power for her, a hunter and her guide were being hunted by someone in the queen’s realm who wanted her dead. With Milla Jovovich (Resident Evil franchise, Monster Hunter) as Gray Alys, Dave Bautista (The Killer’s Game, My Spy franchise) as Boyce, Arly Jover (Blade, A Prominent Patient) as The Enforcer, Amara Okereke (Red Rise-TV, The Morning After-TV) as The Queen, and Fraser James (Yardie, Resident Evil: The Final Chapter) as The Patriarch; this movie based on a George R.R. Martin (Game of Thrones) short story was cheaply done. I thought the special effects and sets were paltry and unimpressive. Even if the entire movie was shot in one room and everything shown was CGI, it was poorly done and unrealistic looking. The script bounced around, never providing a cohesive plan of logic. As for the acting, it was nothing but average at best. I honestly was not sure why Milla and Dave agreed to star in it until I saw they were producers. What were they thinking? This film was a disappointment, and I wonder if there was only one person in charge who greenlighted everything needed to create this waste of time.
1 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
THE TICKETS WERE MORE THAN I like to spend for live theater, but the recommendation I got was glowing for this production. A friend raved about this pre-Broadway production that was stopping here for a trial run before heading to New York; they said I had to see it. I get a kick out of seeing a play or musical before its Broadway run because the tickets are a whole lot cheaper, and I enjoy being first to discover something that becomes a major sensation afterwards. The night of the performance, a small group of us got dressed up and went out to dinner before curtain time. When we finally arrived at the theater, it looked like a mob scene. There were people everywhere, taking selfies in front of the theater posters and marquee. We bypassed all of it to make our way inside the theater lobby. By the time we settled into our seats, the theater lights flashed on and off to signal to all those standing it was time to get seated. And right on time the lights went off and the production began. It was staged beautifully, with elaborate sets and dramatic lighting. There were parts that were amusing, but to be honest, I was bored through parts of it. For everything my friend praised about this play; I had a different reaction. I did not get it at all, and I already was regretting the amount of money I spent to come see it. Just one big disappointment. IT IS BECAUSE OF THINGS LIKE that, I am hesitant to recommend anything. I am sure you have experienced going to a restaurant where someone told you to try and discover you did not care for the meal. Or try a new food item from the grocery store and your reaction differs from the person who told you about the product. Taste is such a personal thing; we all have different combinations of taste buds, where some people think an item is too salty and others feel it is too sweet. When I suggest a restaurant place to someone, I always preface it with my food issues, such as not liking spicy, or heat infused food. I also do not like gooey types of food. My pizza must be well done; if it comes to the table looking wet with oil and the cheese ready to slide off the crust, I will not eat it. So, you can see, this is why I tell people my taste preferences, to lessen the chance of disappointment. On a similar note, I found myself in this situation. Having heard so much about the Dungeons & Dragons game, I was all prepared to have a great time watching this action, adventure comedy. DESPARATE TO REVIVE HIS DECEASED WIFE, a thief plots to steal a lost relic to help in his quest. He soon discovers he cannot accomplish it on his own. With Chris Pine (Star Trek franchise, Don’t Worry Darling) as Edgin, Michelle Rodriguez (The Fast and the Furious franchise, Widows) as Holga, Rege-Jean Page (The Gray Man, Bridgerton-TV) as Xenk, Justice Smith (Paper Towns, Pokemon: Detective Pikachu) as Simon and Sophie Lillie (It franchise, Gretel & Hansel) as Doric; this fantasy film confused me. Keeping in mind I was not familiar with the game this film is based on, I felt lost many a time. For the first half, I was bored multiple times. On the plus side, the movie was visually stimulating as well as creative. I enjoyed the cast, especially the chemistry between Chris and Michelle. There were parts of the story I did not understand; maybe because I never played the game. Not until the last half of the story, did things pick up for me. The fight scenes were fun and well-choreographed. And the special effects were well done. I wished I would not have been as disappointed as I was with this picture. For me, it has potential for creating a better sequel. There was one brief extra scene during the ending credits.
2 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: The School for Good and Evil
UNLESS I HAVE BEEN A WITNESS, I take the comment, “they are a good person,” with a grain of salt. You see, I believe everyone comes into this world with the capacity for being both good and evil. It all depends on what the individual choses to act upon. This is why, one of my favorite sayings is, “Actions have consequences.” I know for myself I am a combination of the two; when I was younger, I relied more on evil than good. For example, when at a party and I felt someone had slighted me, I would make them uncomfortable by my actions until they would leave. Nothing I am proud of I have to say; but I was an angry individual then. These days, I feel I am more of a good person and am always amazed how much easier it is to act that way. Being bad took a lot of energy. I know this one person who makes a point of always telling people about the good things they do for others. I am not denying they do it, but I always find it weird when a person must announce it instead of just letting it be. It comes off as bragging to me. And though this person claims to be good, they are the first to talk and say negative things about someone behind their back. They make fun of a person’s looks and/or clothing; I do not find that being a good individual. IN PAST REVIEWS, I HAVE TALKED about those individuals who have done evil things; so, today I want to focus on a person I know who, for the circumstances they found themselves in, still chose to act in a decent, good way instead of being a mean vindictive being. When you meet this person the first thing you would notice is the lightness in their eyes and their smile. There is a warm inviting energy they exude that lets a person know they are in a safe environment. It is rare one must ask them for help because they are perceptive enough to understand and offer their help freely. Having been in this person’s presence, I can solidly state they are a good individual. There is zero trace of them acting in a competitive or sneaky way. To be honest with you, whenever I have been around them, I leave with the thought I wish there were more people like them in the world. I am so sure of it that I believe they could easily fill in for the head of the school for good in this fantasy comedic drama. TWO BEST FRIENDS, WHO HAVE DONE everything together, suddenly find themselves at opposite ends when one is accidently picked for a different school. The separation will have a lasting effect on them as well as the schools. With Kit Young (A Midsummer Night’s Dream, The Origin) as Rafal, Sophie Anne Caruso (37, Crash & Burn-TV movie) as Sophie, Sofia Wylie (Back of the Net, High School Musical: The Musical-TV) as Agatha, Rob Delaney (Deadpool 2, Catastrophe-TV) as Stefan and Charlize Theron (Monster, Mad Max: Fury Road) as Lady Lesso; there were several aspects of this movie that I enjoyed. The visuals and special effects were stunning and fun. I always enjoy watching Charlize in character and I thought she was a great counterbalance to Kerry Washington’s character. The message regarding good and evil was something I especially enjoyed and thought the writers did a decent job conveying it. However, there were other storylines that cluttered the message and made this film longer than it needed to be. The other issue for me was what I perceived to be the similarity to the Harry Potter and Percy Jackson stories. With some editing and a little more character development, I think this could have been a better picture. It was obvious the studio is hoping for a sequel, but I am not sure that would be a good idea if they are going to stick with the same writing team.
2 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: Earwig and the Witch
THE WOMAN IN THE PHOTOGRAPH WAS old looking, but I did not know she was ancient. I was working on creating a wall of family photos and the photograph of her was sent to me. When I first got it, I had no idea who she was or the younger woman who was standing next to her in the photo. When I found out, I was absolutely blown away; she was my great, great, great grandmother. The woman standing next to her was my great, great aunt. I kept staring at the photograph because I could not believe I was looking at someone who was connected to me from such a long time ago. And when I say a long time ago, when doing the math, I mean she was alive when Napoleon invaded Russia, hence the 1812 Overture by Tchaikovsky. This small and frail looking woman was seated in a chair or stool with her arms folded in her lap. Her clothing looked like it could swallow her up; the skirt hung down to the floor and her jacket or sweater was dark and long as well. She had a scarf tied around her head as if she were about to go outside, though the sepia colored photo showed her to be inside. I could only imagine what kind of life she must have lived, but because of her I was here. DESPITE NOT KNOWING SOME OF THE relatives in the photographs I have in my possession, I feel a connection to all the people. It is a weird feeling that I do not know if I can explain but looking at all the relatives in the photos had the effect of centering or grounding me. I felt like I had tapped into my roots; I was not some transient who floats from one thing to the next without having a “home base” to return to. Maybe another way I can explain it is by saying my life story, though it is unique to me, shared common ground with the stories from all of these relatives, whether they are deceased of alive. This reminds me of another photograph I got that has 5 relatives in it. I found out that this particular photograph used to be quite famous in the family because it was the first and maybe only one that depicts 5 generations of the family in one photograph. Each one of them has played a part in laying the groundwork for me and my generation of relatives; I just find that so amazing. I know I am lucky that I can have a history with individuals who share the same bloodline as me. It is one of the reasons why I understood what the main character was going through in this animated fantasy film. GROWING UP IN AN ORPHANAGE AND seeing her friends being adopted, only made Earwig, voiced by relative newcomer Taylor Henderson, wish for a family of her own. There was a chance her wish could be fulfilled when an odd couple came calling on the orphanage one day. With JB Blanc (Breaking Bad-TV, Bleach-TV) voicing Mr. Jenkins, Thomas Bromhead (I Got a Rocket-TV, Forest of Piano-TV) voicing the cook, Richard E. Grant (Hudson Hawk, Gosford Park) voicing the Mandrake and Vanessa Marshall (The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy-TV, Young Justice-TV) voicing Bella Yaga; this film festival winner was Studio Ghibli’s first foray into using CGI in their animation. In some instances, it worked but other times I was underwhelmed by the animation. I could say the same thing for the script. For an animated film, I found this one to be dull and uninspired. The way the story ended was awful and there was nothing fun or enchanting about the story. I do not know if even small children would care for this picture. If I were Earwig, I think I would have spent more time wishing for a way to get out of this movie.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: The House with a Clock in its Walls
LEARNING THE HISTORY ABOUT FAMILY MEMBERS can be a fun experience. Some of the things I found out about my relatives seem so out of character to the people I knew. There is a relative of mine who holds the patent on some particular lint trap that is part of a washing machine. Another family member was a gangster. In the family I had an umbrella maker, a butcher and the owner of the first cable boxes that came into existence. As you can see the list is quite varied and I get a kick out of the randomness of it. Recently I was talking with a friend about a movie that is coming out later in the year. Based on the trailer I mentioned I was looking forward to seeing this film about Mary, Queen of Scots. You will not believe what he told me about Mary; his family history has a branch of it that is loosely tied to Mary. Listening to the connections between the deceased relatives, I was struck with the fact he was able to remember who married who and whose brother’s sister-in-law was part of the genealogy trail. It was astounding listening to so many generations coming from this one side of his family. THERE IS NOTHING AS FASCINATING IN my family tree as my friend’s; but if I had such knowledge on the history of my family, I wonder what historical facts I would find out about my deceased relatives. One of the things I know is which countries some of my relatives were born in. I remember in school I would check out books from the library that pertained to these countries, wanting to learn about its history and how it came into being the mother and fatherland of my relatives. My knowledge barely goes back 3 generations of my family. Pretty much all I know is how relatives made their way to America. One relative was sent here with her sister when they were in their teens. She was going to be married off to someone she knew back home who had been sent over earlier to get established in a city. I have other relatives who did not want to migrate but had to because of war. There was a story told about brothers who as children had to be hidden in the forest to escape being kidnapped or worse killed by enemy forces. Though the young boy in this family fantasy only had to be shipped to the state of Michigan, he found out there was something special about him and his family tree. ORPHANED DUE TO THE DEATH OF his parents Lewis Barnavelt, played by Owen Vaccaro (Daddy’s Home franchise, Mother’s Day), was sent to live with his uncle Jonathan Barnavelt, played by Jack Black (Goosebumps, Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle), who was an odd man. There was a reason why Jonathan was different. With Cate Blanchett (Ocean’s Eight, Thor: Ragnarok) as Florence Zimmerman, Kyle MacLachlan (Blue Velvet, Dune) as Issac Izard and Renee Elise Goldsberry (Sisters, The Good Wife-TV) as Selena Izard; this comedy film was aided by the chemistry between Cate and Jack, which granted seemed an oddball pairing. They were fun together and I enjoyed the way the film started out. I thought it was strange to have Lewis presented with his aviator goggles and bow tie, but at first I did not mind. It was not until the story moved into the 2nd half where I started losing interest. This is where the script was muddy with different references. For me I felt the story was becoming more of a cartoon, meaning silly. With a little more history, development and originality; this picture would have been more enjoyable for me.
1 ¾ stars
Flash Movie Review: Blair Witch
Fortunately I was not one of those kids who would get carsick. I knew a couple of children who were never invited to take a ride in anyone’s new automobile; for fear the new upholstered or leather seats would no longer have that new smell after they went along for a ride. Even though I was fine being in a car, there were a couple of adults I avoided when they were the drivers. One in particular was referred to as the cowboy because you felt you were riding a bucking bronco (the actual horse, not the car) anytime you would be riding with them. Most people when they see a stop sign or red stoplight would slow down as they neared the intersection, but not them. They would continue the same speed, which by the way was always over the speed limit; all the way until they were just about at the cross street and then they would slam down hard on the brakes. You could not help but be forced forward in your seat. When it came to making a left or right turn it was always better to hold onto the armrest so you would not slide across the seat. After spending just a little time in their car would cause me to have a headache. The constant hard stopping and quick starts just made the entire ride a series of jerking motions that never was pleasant. When I finally could exit their car I usually was dizzy and needed to sit still for a few moments after. It has been years since I experienced a ride like that until I sat through this horror thriller. HAVING seen new footage of the Blair Witch woods James, played by James Allen McCune (The Walking Dead-TV, Shameless-TV) was convinced his missing sister could still be alive. The only way he would know for sure would be to venture into the demonic area. This film also starred Callie Hernandez (Machete Kills, Members Only-TV movie) as Lisa Arlington, Corbin Reid (Words with Girls-TV movie, Kingdom-TV) as Ashley and Brandon Scott (An American in Hollywood, Knife Fight) as Peter. Sitting through this picture I was essentially uncomfortable for most of the time. There was nothing I found positive about this film. Most of you know I am not a fan of the found footage way of shooting a picture, but watching this was more painful than usual. The jerky movements, the poor lighting, the multiple scenes where the camera was dropped on the ground and the periodical blackouts made for a scattered mess on the big screen. There really was no acting to speak of and I did not find any suspense or horror except for one character’s medical condition. I honestly do not know what the point was in making this film; just like the bizarre sound effects had no meaning to me. These random sounds would take place to scare the characters but nothing had any follow through to it. After enduring this movie all the way to the end, all I got out of it was a headache. I would hate to see what would happen for those viewers who get motion sickness; it doesn’t sound like a pretty picture either way.
1 ½ stars
Flash Movie Review: The Huntsman: Winter’s War
They share similar features, have the same inflection in their voice, with mannerisms that are alike, even from the same gene pool; yet they are nothing like each other. This is something that has always fascinated me: the similarities and differences between siblings. I always wanted to figure out what were the factors that caused brothers and sisters to turn out the way they did when they were from the same parents. One of the obvious things to me was the birthing order because I strongly believe there is unique baggage in being an older, middle or younger sibling. I have seen families who blatantly treated their first born child differently compared to their 2nd born. From the people I know who were the youngest of their siblings I know some people claim this group was spoiled the most by their parents. I do not totally agree with this; I just think by the time the youngest of at least 3 children have been born, the parents were too tired to care about the same things they once did with their older children. Personally I am not a fan of dressing up one’s children in the same clothing; I feel it takes a bit away from a child’s identity. Now when siblings display strong reactions towards each other, I have to wonder what took place in their childhood that caused such negative feelings towards each other. It is so perplexing to me that I notice when I am introduced socially to new people I tend to ask them at some point if they have any siblings. You should hear some of the responses I have gotten, but nothing that matches the siblings’ story in this fantasy adventure drama. AFTER suffering a horrific loss Freya, played by Emily Blunt (Sicario, Into the Woods), decided to leave her older sister Ravenna, played by Charlize Theron (Young Adult, Mad Max: Fury Road), and stake out her own land where she would be the sole ruler. Her kingdom would have one major law: falling in love was not allowed. The special effects in this action film were certainly fun to watch with the actors. Besides Charlize and Emily there was Chris Hemsworth (In the Heart of the Sea, Thor franchise) as Eric and Jessica Chastain (Crimson Peak, A Most Violent Year) as Sara. I was stoked to see this cast especially in the fight scenes; however, the dull script ruined the already poorly thought out story. I could not believe two actresses like Emily and Charlize were not given more powerful dramatic scenes that they could easily have handled. With the multiple story lines I do not know if this picture was a prequel or sequel; it was totally baffling to me. The writers and director could have created a wild fantasy franchise but for me this movie was a bust. I do not know about you, but I have seen more sparks and drama at a family dysfunction.
1 ¾ stars
moviejoltz 